


Rainbows in my Veins, Music in my Memory

by Oblivion_Wanderer



Category: The Bifrost Incident - The Mechanisms (Album), The Mechanisms (Band)
Genre: (eventually) - Freeform, Canon-Typical Violence, Developing Relationship, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Feelings Realization, Hurt/Comfort, Lyf and Marius are both idiots about their feelings, Lyf has a bad time, Mutual Pinning, Nightmares, Other, Post-Bifrost, Slow Burn, how to deal with being marked by a cosmic horror, nastya is also here bc i say so, nonbinary Lyf, pinning, slightly weird eldritch happenings on Lyf's part, the Mechs just adopt Lyf eventually, there's gonna be a happy end don't worry, usual Mechanisms nonsense
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:27:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 83,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23062444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oblivion_Wanderer/pseuds/Oblivion_Wanderer
Summary: Worn down by nightmares and overwhelmed with existential dread, Lyfrassir Edda crosses paths with the Mechanisms once more, much to their regret. Even worse given one is the violin wielding Marius von Raum. And even worse, is that something’s happening to them that’s more than just nightmares.aka, Lyf deals with being marked by the Bifrost, as well feelings for a certain space pirate.
Relationships: Lyf & the rest of the Mechs, Lyfrassir Edda/Marius von Raum
Comments: 135
Kudos: 303
Collections: Stowaways' Shenanigans





	1. We're Really In It Now

**Author's Note:**

> ...I don't know how we got here but here we are.
> 
> I intended originally for this to be just a oneshot but it's since spiraled out of control, as it turns out I have a lot of this in my head to write down. I know it says (at the time this first part is posted) that there's gonna be 5 chapters, but that may be subject to change.
> 
> (also, Lyf is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns bc I say so)

Another nightmare jolts Lyfrassir from their sleep (or what sleep they could manage); a cold sweat on their skin and their heart racing inside their chest. The faint, haunting sound of static lingers in their mind. All that comes out of their throat is a strained cry; an attempt to vent the terror that gripped them in the dream.

Again… again with this….

The nightmares, ones they’ve been having ever since escaping on this craft, were the same old same old; reflections of the screaming, tearing, and the pure madness of things they’ve seen in the recordings of the Black Box. There’s also the singular frozen frame that keeps appearing in their dreams, of Odin as she grins at the camera. Lyf is still convinced she was looking right at them, as if the lens had been a window back into the failed voyage of the train 80 years prior.

That alone makes Lyf shudder, makes them feel vaguely ill. That’s usually how it is when they wake from one of these dreams; feeling cold, alone, and sick. And always with the feeling of being watched.

They pull their cloak tighter around them and look out the observation window to the void, if only to distract from the flickers of rainbows that still linger in their vision. They had forgotten for a moment that they had fallen asleep here, tucked up against the window in a tired, drunken slumber from downing half a bottle of whiskey. And that probably hadn’t been the best idea, given they already felt awful and they made themself sick off it nearly an hour later.

They put a hand up to the glass of the observation window, the material cool against their skin. Unfortunately it does little to soothe their troubled mind, and only reminds Lyf of their doomed home.

Lyf misses home, now far, far behind them. When they’d seen the truth- the horrors, about what really happened in the Bifrost, what was inevitably going to emerge- they’d fled as quickly as they could, stuffing a few of their possessions into an old backpack and charting a ship. The only things they had with them, aside from the clothes on their back, were as followed:

> -A bottle of whiskey, now half empty (They prefer mead, but whiskey works too)  
>  -One set of clothes (that wasn’t the uniform they still currently wore).  
>  -A dark purple cloak that was a gift from their mother.  
>  -A small bundle of photos bound together by a rubber band.  
>  -A paperback book; their favorite book, actually.  
>  -The stupid, accursed Black Box, stuffed into the bottom of their bag. The only record of what happened to their world aside from themself. That’s the only reason they bothered to hold onto the damn cube.

It hurt to leave their home, everything they knew, behind. The first few hours after leaving the Hoddmimis mining colony, they broke down in tears, knowing everything they knew would be no more (or worse). Lyf knew with certainty they were the only one left of their world, even if they hoped others found their warning in time and fled as well.

Knowing all this was like a stab to the heart. However, they know it was better this way, lest be devoured by the thing that was unleashed from the Bifrost (Yog-Sothoth, their brain supplies). They’d gone beyond the Hoddmimis mining colony by this point, having gathered what supplies they could there, which was mostly fuel for the ship. Lyf didn’t even know where they were going at this point, but the further the better. They hoped that somewhere out there was someplace where the Bifrost and its horrors within could not find them.

Yet, even if they found some safe place, they knew they’d never be able to shake what they had seen; that some part of the Bifrost would remain with them. It’s sunken into them; burrowed and taken root. Trauma, they reasoned; putting down the recurring nightmares as evidence to that point.

Lyf lowers their hand and lets out a shaky sigh, having calmed down somewhat. They’re not seeing multicolor anymore at least, and the static has stopped ringing in their ears. They still feel exhausted and weary, mostly from the dreams, which hasn’t been great for their health. And yes, maybe they are a bit sick; whether from the constant nightmares, the stress, existential dread, or missing home. Maybe all, really.

Or maybe it’s been because they’ve been stuck on this ship for a little over a week (save for the stop at Hoddmimis). Cabin fever and all that.

Speaking of which-

A noise from one of the nearby consoles manages to catch their attention, and Lyf mutters something under their breath. They force themself up from the metal floor and stumble over to see what could possibly be going on. If they’re lucky, maybe it’s an incoming beacon from another ship.

But of course, they’re not that lucky.

Something is indeed going wrong with one of the ships systems. Looks like… Oh great. It’s either the climate control systems or life support systems that are on the edge of being on the fritz.

“Fantastic.” Lyf grumbles sarcastically.

They sit down in the pilot’s seat, not entirely sure where to start. They know some things about the workings of spacecraft, but for the most part they’ve had the ship running in auto pilot mode for navigation and automating the rest of the systems. Plus, the ship was an older model; best Lyf could afford on short notice.

They try and keep composure and first take stock of what was going on. Keep a level head.

“Okay, systems may be going wrong. Not good.” Lyf says to themself, eyes darting over the controls. “Think it through logically… Run diagnostics.”

Lyf manages to locate the diagnostics program and sets it to run, primarily for checks on the climate controls and life support. While that searches for the problems, they go over to the star charts in navigation, setting a search for any nearby systems within reasonable distance. While they did get some supplies from Hoddmimis, it was not going to last forever. They had enough to last a few more days, but they would have to find someplace to restock.

While Lyf waits anxiously for anything to ping on the navigation search, the diagnostics finish running. Turning their attention to those, Lyf sees that there are problems detected in _both_ systems.

Fucking great.

“Can’t have either going down, especially life support. Might crash some other systems too, like the oxygen pumps. Though… that wouldn’t exactly be a bad way to die. Better that than whatever horrors have taken Yggdrasil. Let’s see… do these show me...” Looking through the diagnostics log, Lyf finds that the logs list a possible problem. “Looks like a loose cable or two. Hm...”

It probably wasn’t a good idea to try and fix it on their own, but they had to try, at least until they could get to someplace that they could possibly get it fixed. The logs told them where the loose cable was- an adjacent corridor that lead towards the sleeping quarters (though half the time Lyf slept it was in this room instead of the room with an actual bed).

“I could at least try and fix it. Just… Just until I-”

Another alarm went off from another console. Lyf tried to find out what it was, but all they caught was a report of a power surge (due to the auto pilot stupidly rerouting things to compensate for the possible failing systems) before something sparked across the consoles violently.

They jump to their feet and away from all the things still sparking, but with a rush of dizziness from standing too quickly, rainbows flash suddenly, like when your vision goes spotty but in multicolored format. Instinctively, Lyf covers their eyes to block it out- they don’t want to see it. They don’t want to see. Go away, go away- _Flashes like camera bulbs_ -

But as they stumbled backwards, everything suddenly goes fuzzy and they don’t feel a thing. They don’t feel themself falling. The next thing they know, they’ve collapsed onto the floor.

Lyf just lays there; sounds of alarms blaring out around them as they stare up at the ceiling in a daze. Somehow it was much better sounding than the static of their nightmares. It distantly occurs to Lyf that they fainted somehow, but they don’t have the energy to care. Their head hurts. They feel ill, like they have for this entire damn flight. They’re tired of this, of everything.

They’re just adrift.

Those alarms are still going off. The lights stutter and go off. Definitely not good.

‘ _Cascading system crash.’_ Lyf reasons, thoughts drifting. _‘This is it then…?’_

Yes… Yes, this must be the end. If all the systems are going down, from a stupid loose cable and power surge of all things, then there was very chance they were going to die very soon, depending on what system decided to shut down competently. They doubted they could even fix everything that was going wrong on their own. There was nothing to be done.

So, after feeling away from an eldritch horror, and then having all the systems in their ship likely go into failure, this was it.

Lyf missed home still, even though there was no home to go back to. Everything was gone, and they were the last one left. They were the last; tormented by swirling technicolor dreams and the horrors within, and the sensation of being watched. Lyf’s tired and sick of it all, and now they would die, but at least not by the hand of the Bifrost’s madness.

‘ _Gods, please don’t let me dream of it. Let me have the blessed dark.’_

Lyf closed their eyes, accepting this fate with a heavy heart; resigning to letting themself slip away to whatever death awaited them.

They just lay there and breathed until they drift back into unconsciousness.

They didn’t even see the ping from a still working console, indicating an incoming beacon from a nearby ship.

…

(They don’t even see the faint rainbow pulse under their shirt- it won’t let them die yet)

* * *

“You coming to check out that wayward ship too?” Ivy asks.

Marius eyes her as they walk into the hangar bay. Raphaella and Tim are with them too. “Yeah, why not? The more the merrier, I say. Surprised Jonny didn’t want to join in on the fun.”

“He doesn’t really care what we do with the thing.” Tim says with a shrug. “Also, he’s seeing if Ashes can shoot a bottle off his head. Regardless, the ship Brian picked up on is small enough for a few people at most, so Jonny said we can just strip it for supplies and anything else. Maybe if there’s a few people on board you can “psychoanalyze” them or something.”

“Well, if there is anyone on board they may well be dead.” Raphaella speaks up. “No response to our beacon. It’s already been brought into the hangar via the grav field, so we’ll find out if there’s really anyone’s home.”

“We can still loot it; just won’t be as fun. But I get to blow it up after.”

Marius laughs, then addressing Ivy. “What do you get out of this?”

“I want to see if there’s anything I can add to my collection.” She simply replied. “Do you forget I am an archivist?”

“Fair enough, I guess.” Marius doesn’t really know enough about Ivy’s never-ending quest to add to her so-called “collection”, but whatever made her happy. They were all just here to cause chaos. It was what they all did best.

The ship they’d picked up had been small enough to bring into the hangar bay, and it waited for them silently. It had looked like most, if not all, its systems had gone out when they had decided to check it out (for supplies and letting Tim blow it up for amusement). The style of the craft itself was vaguely familiar to Marius, but he didn’t care to try and place where.

They get into the ship without issue and begin to search for any supplies to use (and anyone to torment). The ship is quiet and still, however.

For her part, Ivy makes her way up to the control room to see if she can get anything off the ships databases. Anything that was not in her collection she saw as hers for the taking. The others can go do whatever it is they want, but she’d at least try and get something before inevitably being demolished by Tim in a wonderful explosion.

Reaching the control room, she finds it empty… save for someone lying on the floor near the control consoles. Curious, seeing that this is the only person they’ve encountered, Ivy goes over to them. They look to be unconscious, or sleeping, or possibly dead, but she’s got a pistol on her in case she’s wrong. She also spots a backpack near the body.

When Ivy gets close enough she recognizes the person and lets out a laugh. It all clicks into place. She knows them all too well.

“Would you look at that.” She then speaks into her coms link. “Raphaella. Von Raum. Come over to the control room. You’re not gonna believe who I found.”

She kneels down and pokes the person in the shoulder, trying to provoke a reaction from them. She got none, figuring whatever happened must have knocked them out cold, or killed them. She saw no wounds on their person though. Besides, she’d leave that for Marius to determine.

Soon enough, she heard the others arrive into the room. “Aright, what is it, Ivy? Find something for the collection?”

She smiled and stood up. “Take a wild guess.”

With that, she stepped off to the side to reveal her find.

Raphaella was the first to react. “Isn’t that Inspector Lyfrassir?”

Then Marius. “Thought we left that guy back on Midgard. I figured they would have vanished with the rest of them after the whole, you know, unspeakable eldritch horrors from the Bifrost.”

“Well, they were the one looking into the Ratatosk Express. Maybe they found what they were looking for and got out of the Yggdrasil system in time. Would explain why they’re all the way out here.”

“Maybe so. There was an 80% chance they would have taken that course of action.” Ivy looks down at the unconscious Lyfrassir and pokes him again, this time with her foot. “Can you tell if they’re alive, Marius? They don’t have any injuries from what I can tell, but they’re awfully pale.”

He walks over, kneeling down next to Lyf to get a better look. After a minute or so, he reports, “Yeah, they’re alive; looking a little worse for wear, but still got a pulse.”

“Great.” Raphaella chimes in. “What are we supposed to do with one unconscious Inspector then?”

“We could always take them back with us.” Marius says with a grin. “He was fun to annoy.”

“Seriously? You know Jonny won’t like that. We don’t really keep guests.”

Ivy thinks on this for a moment, remembering all too well what had become of the Yggdrasil system. She, Raphaella, and Marius had made a quick getaway once Lyf had left, muttering about the Black Box. Looking down at them now, she knew they had managed to get away in time since they were here now, but she also knew there was every possibility Lyf did not get away unscathed in some manner. Still, perhaps she could get some more history of the system from Lyf. She’d gathered plenty from her time there, mostly from Midgard, but the more information the better, especially given recent events.

“Admittedly, I’m interested in seeing if the Inspector here knows anything more about the Yggdrasil system. Perhaps I shall make them my assistant. Then you can annoy them all you like, von Raum.” Ivy spoke at last.

“Is that a good idea?” Raphaella asks, arms crossed. “They may have escaped, but was that before or after the Bifrost bleed into their world?”

“There is a 35% chance they have been touched by the Bifrost in some way. Poor thing’s probably traumatized by whatever awful things they saw in the Black Box.”

“Alright, but if Jonny gets annoyed and shoots one of you, don’t blame me.”

It’s at that moment, that Tim decides to join them.

“There you guys are.” He says, walking into the room. “There’s some stuff we can salvage from the engine room, but nothing much else.” And a pause as he sees them gathered around Lyf, who is still out cold. “What you find there?”

“Just that guy Marius kept annoying with his violin while we were on Midgard.” Raphaella supplies.

“That the Lyfrassir Edda fellow you told us about?”

“Yeah. We thought they would have died with the rest of the Yggdrasil system, but looks like we were wrong. Ivy thinks they might have some more information for her archive so I guess we’re taking them back with us.”

Tim looks to Lyf on the ground, and then back to the rest of them. “Can I still blow up this ship?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Good. However… You do know Jonny might not like the idea of a “guest” and shoot one of you in the head, right?”

“That’s what I told these two!” Raphaella gestures at Ivy and Marius. Ivy shrugs; they’d live.

“Alright, von Raum. I’ll leave Lyfrassir to you.” Ivy announces. “Don’t break them. If they have anything on the Yggdrasil system, I want it. And grab their stuff too while you’re at it.”

“Have faith; they’re in good hands.” Marius says with a wink.

Ivy can’t help but laugh.

* * *

Lyf is slow to come back into consciousness, though their sleep this time was free of nightmares. A small blessing. Everything feels weighed down and sluggish; a feeling that’s consistent through their entire being. However, it feels nice, in a way; they feel warm and comfortable for the first time in a while. It’s almost like like they’re curled up by a fireplace and Gods, it is really tempting to just stay like this.

Aside from that- Their mind is a hazy mess at the moment, and they just feel unwell in general,- so tired- but still they manage to latch onto the sounds of nearby voices. The voices are… talking about them?

“Ivy’s interested in them?”

“So she says.”

“And what do you get out of this, Marius? I hear tell you mostly just got on their nerves. Besides, we don’t keep guests. Could be marked by that multicolor nightmare for all we know.”

“Ivy says there’s only a 35% chance of that, and probably mostly psychological from staring in the Black Box for so long.”

“35%. Really now?”

Okay, so the voices are definitely talking about them. One of the voices was unfamiliar, but the names mentioned, and the other voice, ring bells in their head.

‘ _That’s- Please tell me I’m dreaming.’_ Lyf hopes, before forcing their eyes open. It looks like they’re in some sort of medical bay. They still hear the voice, talking more about Ivy, and they turn their head in the direction of the voices.

They don’t recognize the man with the streaks of black across their face, like lightning bolts, but they do recognize the one with the- oh gods- that stupid hat and the mechanical arm.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding.”

Lyf’s barely able to voice this, but it seems to be enough to catch the attention of the others, who stop talking and look over at them instead.

Marius von Raum grins at them. “Welcome back, Inspector.”

“Former.” Lyf rasps.

“Hmph. You’re awake then.” The man with the black lines across his face says. “You don’t seem too happy to see us. Or Marius at least.”

Lyf manages to lift their head slightly. “Just let me go back to my ship and toss me into the void so I can die in peace.”

“Yeah, about that… Tim already blew it up.”

Lyf blinks, and then lets out a groan, their head falling back onto the pillow.

“Come now, Lyf. Better here then in that tin can you were drifting around in.” Marius says, still grinning at them.

Lyf tries to snap back some remark, but then it hits them that if their ship is gone-

“M-My bag!” They exclaim, breaking their still state and trying to force themself up from where they lay, ignoring the sudden dizzy spell that came over them. That bag had some of the last mementos of their home; the last remaining artifacts of it now. “Where-”

Marius cuts them off; putting a hand on their shoulder and pushing them back down. “Relax; you’re not well. Raphaella grabbed your things. Don’t pull that IV out or I’ll stick you with another one.”

Lyf looks to their arm, and sees there is an IV line stuck in it. They also realize that their cloak and coat have been removed, leaving them in their shirt and trousers. At least their family ring is still on their hand where they left it. A blanket has also been thrown haphazardly across their lap. Lyf settles back down and looks at Marius and… whoever the other man is. He just watches quietly.

“Where is “here” exactly?” Lyf asks, mostly directing the question to the one they don’t know.

“I’ll do it.” This other answers. “You’ll just want to explain in song.”

“Where’s your sense of humor?” Marius chuckles. He’s given a sharp look from the other and he says nothing further.

“I’ve heard of you, but I don’t believe we’ve met yet.” The other man comes up to them. “Name’s Jonny D’Ville; your humble captain.”

“First mate.” Marius teasingly corrects.

Jonny glares at Marius. “Don’t make me shoot you.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Jonny mutters something and then resumes talking to Lyf. “You, former Inspector, are currently aboard the starship _Aurora_. A few of the crew found you on that ship we pulled in and decided to bring you aboard. Lyf, was it?”

“Lyfrassir Edda.” They reply. “ “Lyf” is just for short, but I don’t mind. But, ah- they/them, please.”

Jonny nods. “Alright. Lyf, then. Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella have told us about you; when they were recounting their time on Midgard.”

“So they have.” Lyf directs their gaze to Marius for a moment, then back to Jonny. “I’m assuming you’re also another one of those bandits. What do you intend on doing with me?”

“We’re known as the Mechanisms; immortal space pirates and vagabonds.”

“Immortal? You’re joking.”

It would account for why those three had not aged at all in the 60 years they were in custody, but still.

“Nope! As for your question- I don’t really care. Personally, I would’ve just left you to whatever fate awaited you, considering you’ve technically been in contact with whatever it was that ate your star system. Your story seemed pretty much done, but it did prove to be interesting from Marius and the others relayed.”

“Thanks for pointing out the obvious. Statement fucking ends.”

Jonny smirked. “You’re interesting, Lyf. Anyway, Ivy seems to think she can get some use out of you, and Marius here seems to like you, so I’ll let you stay for now. Also, if you would be so inclined, I would love to hear your tale about the missing train.”

Lyf gives him a confused look. “...Why? You just said you’ve got details from Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella.”

“Yes, but you, Lyf- you were at the center. You were the one conducting the investigation. You witnessed what the Black Box had captured. Makes for one hell of a story, and we always love picking up a tale or two.”

They want to throw something at Jonny, but they also know that likely wouldn’t phase him (given the whole immortality thing, if it was true). Damn this man for being morbidly curious about the events that brought them here. Though in some way the request is valid, given that Lyf knows that they are literally the only one who knows what happened. Gods, that’s a terrifying (and depressing) thought, one that had crossed Lyf’s mind early on into their flight away from Yggdrasil.

If these space pirates did collect stories though, perhaps there was a way to pass on what they had seen. Perhaps take a little of the weight off their shoulders knowing that someone else knew and understood.

Still.

“No promises.” Lyf finally says.

“Grand.” Jonny winks at them and then turns to Marius. “They’re yours and Ivy’s problem now. You break them or accidentally kill them, that’s on you.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll look after our guest.” Marius assures him. “If you see Ivy, tell her Lyf’s awake.”

“Sure. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to find Toy Solider.”

“Going to toss it out an airlock again?”

“Maybe.”

Lyf watches this brief conversation, a tad bit concerned and confused about what they just heard, and closes their eyes to process all this new information, mostly about the apparent “immortal space pirates”.

When they open their eyes again, they find that Marius has pulled up a chair and is sitting beside them. Lyf attempts to sit up, more carefully this time, and to their surprise, Marius reaches over and tries to help. Lyf shrugs him off at first, but doesn’t fight it when Marius places a hand on their back; keeping them steady and helping to lay back against a couple pillows.

“You three knew. You all fucking knew, didn’t you?” Lyf finally says.

“What? About the train?” Marius replies. “So we did. Ivy and Raphaella were the ones who mostly pieced it together while we were out having fun. Ivy was going to add it to her collection.”

“Bastards. You enjoy watching me squirm trying to figure it out?”

“While it was fun seeing you get frustrated, we didn’t have all the details. We didn’t know what led to it or who caused it; only the result.”

“I’d punch you if I didn’t feel like shit.”

“You can do it later when you’re feeling better. If it helps, I seriously considered coming back and dragging you off with us when we broke out.”

That leaves Lyf honestly speechless. They’re torn between all different kinds of feelings; including, but not limited to being mad Marius didn’t come get them, wishing he had.

...What a strange thought.

They let it go for now. They’re not in the mood to deal with this, or untangle these knots of thoughts and feelings.

“I’m your problem now?” Lyf asks, changing the subject. “If you’re gonna torture and kill me, do it fast. I’ve already been through enough shit.”

“Mine and Ivy’s problem, according to Jonny. And we’re not gonna kill you; Jonny would have done that already. Ivy’s got something in mind for you, but she said she’d wait until you were up. As for me- I’m here to be charming and serenade you with a violin.”

Lyf sinks back against the pillows in annoyance, biting out a sarcastic. “Great.” A pause, and then, “Jonny said some of your crew found me aboard my ship. I don’t really remember what happened.”

“Doubt you would, given you were passed out. Me, Ivy, Raphaella, and Tim were scavenging the ship for stuff we could use, and it was actually Ivy who found you. We took you aboard and I brought you here to be looked after; you seem a bit under the weather.”

“That’s what running from an eldritch monstrosity on short notice will do to you.”

“When’s the last time you slept?” Marius asks, tone slightly serious.

“Just now?”

“That doesn’t count.”

Lyf gives a huff, but answers anyway. “I’ve slept… just not as much lately. I haven’t been particularly well since I left Midgard. Must be stress and all that. Oh, and knowing the fact I’m likely the last person from the Yggdrasil system alive.”

That’s as much as they’ll let on. Lyf doesn’t feel up to discussing their nightmares or their depressing existential musings, especially not to someone like Marius von Raum.

“Suit yourself. I’m keeping you here for the time being, at least until tomorrow. You’re still a bit dehydrated. That’s probably why you feel out of sorts.”

‘ _Oops.’_ Lyf thinks to themself. On top of the week they spent hardy getting any sleep due to their damn rainbow colored nightmares, they’d been barely able to eat or drink, save for the whiskey (which, again, probably wasn’t the best idea) and what granola bars they’d managed. They’d honestly just picked up these things in a rush while on Hoddmimis. The nightmares were just… They left Lyf in a daze most of the time, so such things had slipped their mind.

In any case, Lyf doesn’t have the energy to argue. “Fine. Uh… my- if I’m going to be stuck here, can I at least have my book? It’s in my backpack, wherever it’s ended up at.”

“Raphaella left that here too. It’s next to the bed.” Marius hands Lyf the bag, but then adds, “Interesting ring you got.”

“Don’t get any ideas. You can’t have it.”

“Hey, I’m just curious. I would always see you wearing it whenever you stopped by the prison.”

“I usually do, it’s… it’s my family’s ring.” They look down at the ring, a design of crossing lines arranged like a compass engraved on it. “The design is a Vegvisir; a kind of compass. It’s supposed to mean something along the lines of always finding our way though all the twist and turns in our lives. I wear it every day.”

“Huh. Sentimental type, aren’t you?”

Lyf scowls at that. “You-”

“Hold on. I was going to say that, given what’s happened, I can’t blame you for holding onto it.”

“I… Uh...” Lyf doesn’t know what to really say, what to make of it, so instead they ignore Marius and rifle through their bag. They pull out their book, zipping the bag up again and placing it on the floor. “Thank you.”

“The snarky former Inspector Lyfrassir thanking me? Ha! You must be unwell!”

“Shut up.”

“Heh. There you are.” Marius says with a sly grin. “I’m gonna go see what the rest of the crew is up to. You’re staying here to rest.”

Lyf continues to look annoyed, even if they’re tried. “You do that.”

Marius leaves them alone after that, and Lyf does stare after him for a moment. At least there were no violins this time. There had been this fleeting thought in their mind before they saw the truth in the Black Box that if they ever saw Marius von Raum or those other two again during the investigation that it would be too soon.

But look where they were now.

Lyf opens their book, one that they tended to re-read once a year, and tries to read a passage from where they left off. The old bookmark they’d used sits worn, nestled between the pages. Lyf ends up managing a page or two before they start reading the same paragraph over and over before giving up entirely. Their eyes are slipping closed again. They can’t concentrate.

They recognize that they’re likely exhausted, but constant recurring nightmares will do that to you. And Lyf’s are nothing less but such. Their mind drifts to thoughts of those twisted dreams-

-and for a moment, Lyf’s vision dances with rainbow spots again.

They flinch, taking a sharp inhale of breath. The color is gone just as quick as it came.

‘ _It’s not there. It’s not there.’_ Lyf tells themself.

They rest a shaky hand on their book, giving up on reading it, and distract themself by looking around the room, studying the surroundings. It’s somewhere between hardly used and kind of a mess. They don’t do this for long though, as sleep once again creeps up on them and drags them under.

All Lyf can hope for at this point is that they don’t wake up screaming from Bifrost related terrors… or they don’t waking up to finding some limb of theirs missing.

* * *

Marius checks on Lyf a little while later, after talking with the rest of the Mechs about where to head off to now that they’re a good distance away from the Yggdrasil system. Also after Jonny has tossed Toy Solider out an airlock yet again, but Marius figures it’ll be back before too long.

However, he finds Lyf well asleep by the time he does get back to the medbay. Not surprising, given the circumstances. The former Inspector did not look well when Ivy found them, but they seemed a bit better now. Marius figured that Lyf needed a nice long nap and then they’d be back to their grouchy self (not like they weren’t grouchy already).

It kind of reminds him of when he was still stuck in that prison and Lyf had stopped by one day. It’d been raining, and they had trudged in looking absolutely miserable; hair wet from rain. They had looked nearly asleep on their feet as well. Lyf had wanted to question them about something (That wasn’t about the Ratatosk. This was before then), but had ended up dozing off in their chair. It was kind of funny at the time, since they had insisted stubbornly that they had been fine. Also because Marius had made a joke about asking if their coffee machine was broken, to which Lyf had rolled their eyes at. 

It had also been funny when Marius started  into a round of Tales To Be Told and woke Lyf up. The Inspector had snatched the violin away from him and denied falling asleep. They only got more irritated when Ivy and Raphaella confirmed that, yes, Lyf had fallen asleep.  Marius remembers that day well.

He honestly hadn’t expected to run into Lyf once they had left the Yggdrasil system, he’d just assumed Lyf would have died with the rest of them. Which was a shame, really. Honestly, he’d been fond of Lyf; himself, Ivy, and Raphaella had been anyway. It’d been pretty boring sitting around in a prison for 60 years, but it’d never been boring whenever Lyf dropped by. Sure, Lyf was a bit wound too tight, but it was easy to rile them up- and the look on their face whenever Marius broke out the violin! Not to mention the annoyed pout they always put on was kind of cute.

The last time he had seen Lyf, they had looked into the Black Box and started muttering to themself as they left. Him, Ivy, and Raphaella had chosen to make their escape then before everything dissolved into multicolored nuclear chaos. Marius had been tempted to go find Lyf back then and drag them off to the _Aurora_ with him, but decided it wasn’t worth it. The whole of the Yggdrasil system would be no more, so there really wasn’t any point. Marius had written off Lyf as being good as dead.

But Lyf had escaped, and now they were here. Pure chance, really, even if Ivy said she calculated a 80% chance Lyf would have managed to leave Yggdrasil before it was swallowed by the Bifrost.

Observing Lyf as they sleep, he’s reminded of that  rainy day, though  Lyf’s looking more exhausted than normal. Logically, Marius knows it’s because of everything they have been though recently.  They literally had their whole star system  destroyed; it was hard not to feel bad for Lyf. They’re sleeping now though, so that’s good.  Lyf had always been on the short side, but seeing them lying here in such a worn down state almost made them look even more small and frail.  They should be fine though.

He’s not worried; no way. He’s just… looking after his patient. He is the ship’s doctor after all; that’s his job (maybe not with the legal  medical degree but that’s not the point).

“Jonny told me Edda is awake?” A voice calls to him. He turns to see Ivy leaning against the doorway into the medbay.

“Well, they’re not anymore, so be quiet.” Marius says in a hushed voice. He watches as Lyf’s head rolls to one side, but other than that, they given no indication that they heard him or Ivy. “They’ll be snippy if you wake them up. Outside with you.”

He takes Ivy outside of the room and then closes the door behind them. Ivy just rolls her eyes at him.

“No need to be pushy. I assumed they would be awake, though my calculations said otherwise. However, I did calculate a 50% chance you’d be here.”

“I _am_ this ship’s doctor, you know. Of course I was going to check in on my patient. I figured they’d be out again when I came back anyway.”

“I can’t blame them, given what happened.” Ivy commented. “Edda did manage to outrun a cosmic horror that destroyed a whole star system. They must be exhausted after being adrift for as long as they have.”

“Yeah, poor bastard.”

There’s a silence, and then Ivy asks, “You’re happy to see them, aren’t you?”

“Me?” Marius shrugs. “I guess.”

Ivy chuckles. “Don’t give me that. You are. I’m happy to see them too, but you _missed_ them.”

“Okay, maybe I missed them a little. They were good company.”

“Despite the fact they seemed most annoyed with you?”

“Hey, I’m downright pleasant.”

“You were the one who liked to push their buttons to get a reaction of them. You’d always get this strangely sweet smile whenever they came by.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Ivy said nothing to him, but continued to give him a look like she knew something he didn’t. Marius sighed and continued. “Anyway, you’ll get your assistant tomorrow; we can show Lyf a small mercy and let them rest.”

“Look at you being all nice.” Ivy teases.

“I can be nice!”

“You like to be a nuisance when your not trying to study people’s heads.”

“Don’t you have a library to organize?”

“Oh yes, but I’m waiting till Lyf feels better. With luck some of my finds from Yggdrasil will cheer them up a bit. Speaking of which, I should actually go set some materials aside for them tomorrow.”

“Yeah, you do that.” Then he adds, “Let me know when dinner’s ready?”

Ivy laughed again, taking a step back. “Get it yourself. Go look after your partner.”

“What? You mean Ly- They’re not my anything, Ivy!”

She quickly makes a retreat and Marius just scowls after her until she’s out of sight.

He goes back into the medbay, but stops short after walking a few feet through the door. He looks over to where Lyf sleeps, and yeah, it’s good they’re getting some rest. They’ll be fine.

‘ _Maybe I did miss you, just a bit.’_ Marius thinks to himself.

Yes… he had missed Lyf. That was it. That was solely it- Nothing else.

* * *

They have no idea what time it is when they wake up, but they know when they open their eyes they’re still in the same place where they fell asleep. They feel… a bit odd somehow, but Lyf chalks it up to their likely exhausted state. They think back on the last time they were awake, and it comes back to them in disjointed words.

‘ _Medbay. Aurora. Mechanisms. Oh, right. Dammit.’_

Much to Lyf’s displeasure, they know they’re not dreaming; that they really are on the starship belonging to space pirates that have for some reason decided to let them stay. Lyf looks down and sees all their limbs are still in tact, thank the Gods. The IV line has been removed from their arm, and the blanket was now pulled up to their chest.

‘ _Marius’s doing perhaps’_ They assume. That was…. surprisingly kind for a headache of a man. Lyf remembers Marius claiming to be a doctor on multiple occasions when they were still on Midgard. Lyf never really believed him.

And speak of the devil-

Lyf hears footsteps and turns their head to see Marius approaching. Lyf just gives a dramatic groan and rolls over onto their side, back to Marius. They’re not in the mood to deal with this first thing after waking up.

“What? You wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” He asks. “I can always play you something on the violin to cheer you up!”

Lyf raises one hand and flips a middle finger at him.

To their surprise, they hear a laugh. “Looks like you’re back to normal. Sleep well, former Inspector?”

Lyf doesn’t answer. Though, actually… despite the odd feeling that something’s out of place, they feel more rested than before. It’s a nice change from the nightmares that plagued them while they were on the other ship.

“….I did, surprisingly.” Lyf gets themself sitting up in bed, glancing over at Marius, who’s now standing next to them. “I feel… well, somewhere between weird and okay.”

“Weird how?”

“I… Nevermind; it’s nothing. I’m still waking up a little. I am better though.”

“That’s good!” He claps Lyf on the shoulder, making them flinch.

“Yes… Um-” They hesitate, knowing what they want to say, but not something they expected to. “Gods, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but thank you, von Raum. Thanks for… bringing me aboard your ship. Looking after me.”

Marius beams at them. Oh… Oh, that’s- it’s quite lovely, seeing him smile like that. It suits him. Wait, what? No! Gods…

“I did tell you I am a doctor!” Is the enthusiastic response.

“Ah, yes- yes, you’ve told me many times before. Don’t think I’m any happier about being here though.” They pause to clear their throat. “What time is it? How long have I been out?”

“It’s morning. You slept through most of yesterday after I left.”

“Well, like I said, running from eldritch horrors on short notice.”

“Yeah, yeah.” And then… Marius’s expression changes. He looks sort of confused as he stares at Lyf, like there’s something on their face. Lyf is aware they probably don’t look in the best of shape at the moment. Gods, their hair is probably all messy from sleep.

“...What?” Lyf starts.

“Uh, Lyf, have your eyes always been like that?”

What?

“Have they been like- What are you _talking_ about?”

“Have you always had silver eyes?”

Lyf goes still.

_What?_

“Wh… No- no, my eyes have always been brown- what are you going on about? Is this a joke?”

“I’m being serious! Your eyes- I mean I always thought they were brown too, but- I don’t mean to sound like a sap, but your eyes look like starlight.”

Lyf falls silent, stunned by this news. That… That can’t be right. That can’t be true.

They want to get up and find a mirror just to prove Marius wrong. They want to scream because _why are their eyes apparently silver_? Is this some trick? Is this true? What… what is happening?

(also they’re not awake enough to deal with this)

“Are… Are you being serious about my eyes, von Raum?” They ask.

Marius nods. “Very. I can find you a mirror if you’re so insistent that I’m lying.”

Something about that tone tells Lyf all they need to know. Somehow, they believe him, and if that’s true, suddenly there are more dizzying questions in their mind. Was the reason for that weird feeling earlier? Of something being off; out of place.

“If you- Why- H-How?” Lyf stumbles with their words.

“Not sure. I don’t think they were like that back on Midgard though.”

They try to think, try to reason some explanation to why their eyes have decided to change color (if they have), and to such a stark one. Why…

‘ _Bifrost.’_ Is the answer that comes to mind.

Oh… Oh no…

“Lyf?”

Marius’s voice startles them out of their spiraling thoughts, and Lyf looks up, blinking flickering rainbows from their vision. They see him sitting on the edge of the bed now.

“You okay?” He asks. He sounds… concerned. Huh.

“I… um… I- I-I think, if you’re telling the truth, that it’s the Bifrost, or at least a, ah- a-a side effect.”

“But you never came in direct contact with it, right?”

“No, I got out of the system before then. Maybe- Th-the Black Box. Exposure via the Black Box.”

Marius doesn’t say anything for a moment; just watches them. Lyf averts their gaze.

“...We can always have Raphaella take a look at you.” Marius finally says. “She’s our science officer-”

“No!” They cut him off. They’re not going to be subjected to any more scrutiny. “I’m not some science experiment!”

“Okay, okay! It was only a suggestion.” He retorts, and when Lyf doesn’t respond, he taps their hand to get their attention. “Look, how about instead we see about getting some food in you? Everyone’s already over at the mess and Ivy’s looking forward to speaking with you again.”

Lyf wants to say they’re not hungry, but they know they are. They haven’t eaten anything since being brought onto the _Aurora._ As much as having breakfast with the rest of the Mechanisms makes them nervous, it’s a slight distraction, if anything. Admittedly they know they should try and eat something as well. They can deal with the whole silver eyes thing later.

“Sure, I guess.” They run a hand over their face, trying to stifle a yawn. “Let me change into my other clothes; they’re in my bag.”

* * *

There’s an adjoining room where they can get changed in peace, though Lyf does spot a mirror in said room.

They hesitate when they spot it, thinking back to what Marius told them. Lyf knows what he said, but part of them is hoping that it’s not true and that it’s an awful joke someone put him up to. If it’s true though, Lyf would like to know; to confirm for themself, even if it’s bad.

Lyf takes a breath and goes over to the mirror, trying to brace themself for what they may see.

They see themself, looking awfully haggard and their hair a mess. Their eyes though- Marius was right; they are silver.

The sight startles Lyf, making them take a step back. Then again, what were they expecting? Did they really expect to get out of that unfolding nightmare unscathed? Did they really expect not to have the recordings from the Black Box leave its mark on them after the things they saw within? Especially after the countless times they watched and rewatched the recordings looking for something, anything- _the same scenes, the same faces over and over._

They take in a few deep breaths, trying to compose themself. It’s not the worst that could happen, they suppose. They had been lucky enough to see the truth in the Black Box and escape before the worst happened to begin with. If this is what doing so did to them, so be it. Things could be much worse. They could be dead… or… devoured by that rainbow abyss and changed into something more… squamous.

Besides, they’re currently in the company of space pirates and set to have breakfast with them. Oddly enough, they’re more worried about that at the moment.

‘ _I can live with this.’_ Lyf tries to convince themself. _‘Doesn’t mean anything is wrong; it’s just a side effect. Now, mustn’t keep stupid von Raum waiting.’_

After changing over their clothes and making an attempt at tidying up their hair, Lyf goes back to meet up with Marius. They don’t forget about the sight of their own reflection with silver eyes though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (catch the brief TMA reference)
> 
> So, in the part before Lyf is found by the Mechs- that is based off something that happened to me. During my first year in college, I fainted once in a similar fashion (and woke up next to my trash can five minutes later). I was fine, if not a bit banged up bc I guess I fell back against a wall. I don't remember fainting but I knew it happened.
> 
> The silver eyes thing is... part of something that will become more known as things progress (you can probably already guess)
> 
> The design on Lyf's ring is a symbol known as Vegvisir, which means "that which shows the way". It has origins as an Icelandic symbol that serves as protection against getting lost. Thought that'd be a neat thing to throw in..
> 
> Also I say the Black Box is just some weird af cube that was directly exposed to the Bifrost since it was recovered from/on the stupid train to begin with. (and before you ask I /will/ be using it for something)


	2. Adjustments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lyf has breakfast with the Mechs and tries to settle into their apparent new life among the group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait; I work a full time job so I really only get to write in the evenings and weekends. I'm quite pleased with how many of you have liked this so far though.
> 
> (also this fic keeps evolving, so I'm not really sure how many chapters it's gonna have now)

Lyf meets him back outside the medbay, though Marius notes they seem a bit distracted, fidgeting with their ring silently. He can take a guess as to why they appear so.

He hadn’t been lying about Lyf’s eyes- The new silver stands out starkly in comparison to the hazel color they held before. Lyf had taken it about as well as expected too, with accusations he was just trying to trick them, and then taken on a distant stare as if slowly processing the possibility. Lyf had put this change down to the Bifrost, a fair assessment, but Marius could tell it was still bothering them. He couldn’t blame them, especially with that sort of implication. Lyf had been lucky to get out of Yggdrasil in time, but perhaps not without something to show for it.

Though Marius didn’t really think much about the change in eye color. He really wasn’t bothered by it. It was kind of, hm… pretty on Lyf.

Nope. Not the time.

“There you are.” Marius greets them. “Come on, we should get there before Toy Solider starts putting teeth or bones in the pancakes, granted it found its way back by now.”

Probably not the best thing to say, as Lyf seems to go pale at the notion. “Uh...”

“Forget I said that, but I’ll personally make sure it doesn’t put anything of the sort in your food. Also if it does, Jonny will probably just toss it out the airlock again. That’s a regular thing that happens.”

“I’m not sure if that’s supposed to be reassuring or not.” Lyf says, tugging on one of the sleeves of their sweater. It’s a nice sort of olive green shade, though it looks a little too big for Lyf. Marius makes a mental note to find Lyf some better clothes, especially if they’re gonna be hanging around with him and the rest of the Mechs for the foreseeable future.

Lyf doesn’t look too bad in it though, and their hair has been pulled back into a loose bun. Marius is used to seeing Lyf’s hair done up with fancy braids (Ivy told him it was common for people of the Yggdrasil system, especially on Midgard), but how they have it done now looks nice too.

“Let’s just head over before all of breakfast is gone. You really should try and eat something, and Brian can make a great omelet if you ask him nicely.”

“You’re not going to poison me, are you?” Lyf asks as they start to head toward the kitchen.

“What? No. We usually only break out the poison for pranks on each other.”

“Lovely.” Lyf mutters sarcastically.

They go quiet for a while after that, and more than once Marius glances over to see Lyf still fidgeting with their ring, while looking around without any real point. Marius really does feel bad for them; Lyf just can’t seem to catch a break. He understood, as everyone on this boat carried their own sort of trauma, though what happened to Lyf was vastly different to what had happened to himself and the rest of the Mechs (something he wouldn’t wish on anyone, especially Lyf).

It’s at this point he gets an idea, to try and distract Lyf from whatever is going through their head thanks to the silver eyes thing.

“How about a song?” Marius says with a grin. It’s something he hasn’t done for a while and hadn’t gotten the chance to since Lyf showed back up, given Lyf slept most of yesterday away.

Their head snaps toward him. “Don’t you even-”

Too late. Marius has already got his violin. “You’re looking gloomy, so I’m going to play something to get your spirits up.”

“Where do you keep getting those?” Lyf questions, glaring at him. “If you start playing something...”

Marius starts into a random tune and Lyf’s reaction is immediate. Their face scrunching up in irritation, and displaying that same old scowl. Now that brings back memories.

Five seconds later Lyf’s chasing him through the corridors, trying to snatch the violin out of his hands.

“What’s with you and violins?” They exclaim, catching up to Marius and attempting to get at the instrument. Marius is able to dodge it.

“Because that’s what I play in the band!” He replies. “Didn’t you know we have a band?”

“Oh, must have slipped my mind.” They deadpan. “No.”

“I can play something just for you if you like?”

“No comment.”

Lyf makes another grab, but again, Marius is able to avoid it. “Just like old times, huh?”

“You mean all the violins I had to confiscate from you?”

“Yeah! What do you got against violins, former Inspector?”

“Just- give me the damn-”

This time, they practically collide with Marius as they reach out for the violin. When they connect, both of them loose balance and topple to the floor, violin clattering away.

Marius groans from where he lays on the floor, temporarily dazed. He’s fine really; not the worst thing to have happened to him. He’s a Mechanism; there are far worse things that could happen to him, though he’d still come back from it all the same.

It’s as he’s trying to get his bearings though, he realizes there’s someone on top of him. Not just anyone either.

Marius realizes that Lyf fell on top of him, and meets their silver eyes as they lift their head up. Loose strands of their hair fall freely around their face. Marius also realizes Lyf has a hand on his mechanical arm, and even more so, how close their faces are to one another. Lyf stares at him, and just then he could have sworn to see a faint blush across their face.

The moment is broken when Lyf scurries off him to sit by his side. So much for that.

“You alright?” Marius asks, sitting up and then getting to his feet.

“Yes, of course.” There’s a pause. “...Are you alright?”

“I’m good. You’d be surprised what I’ve endured in my many, many years of traveling across the cosmos.”

“I’m assuming that’s related to the whole immortal thing.”

Marius doesn’t answer that; instead taking a step towards Lyf and extending out a hand for them. He watches as their eyes flicker back and forth from him and the offered hand. Eventually, and somewhat hesitantly, Lyf takes it.

Marius smiles and helps them up, trying not to think too hard about how their hand feels in his. Lyf’s is a bit smaller and more slender compared to him. Briefly he wonders if they ever played an instrument.

Still… It feels nice.

Regretfully, Marius lets go once Lyf’s upright.

“We should, um, continue on.” They say, a bit awkwardly.

“Yeah.” He replies. “And actually, everyone else is interested in meeting you.”

“They are?” Lyf sounds surprised.

“Everyone that hasn’t met you yet anyway.”

“Hm. Von Raum, what are they like? The rest of the crew.”

There’s quite a few words that could serve as an answer, but Marius just settles on, “They’re an interesting bunch. You’ll see.”

“As long as none of them try to kill me.”

“You’ll be fine, Lyf; trust me.”

“If they kill me, I’m blaming you.”

Now there was the Lyfrassir Edda he knew. Mission accomplished.

….Okay, he really did miss Lyf. It was good to have them back.

* * *

There’s a small group of people gathered at a table, talking loudly with each other and- well, someone just threw a fork at another person.

Lyf can only assume these people are the rest of the crew; the Mechanisms.

‘ _It’s fine.’_ Lyf tells themselves. _‘It’s literally just breakfast… with space pirates… hm...’_

One of the group that Lyf recognizes as Jonny spots them and calls out, “About time you got here, Marius. Ah- I see you managed to drag Lyf with you.”

As soon as Jonny says their name, everyone halts their conversations and all their gazes turn on Lyf, making them freeze in place. Their shoulders tense up, all the eyes on them- they can practically feel each individual gaze- reminding them too much of the eyes in the nightmares; the feeling of being watched. They’re suddenly starting to regret all this.

‘ _What have I gotten myself into?’_

Despite their trepidation, and all the pairs of eyes watching them, Lyf makes themselves walk forward. Besides, by the time they manage to unfreeze themself, Marius was already at the table and waving them over.

It was fine. They could handle breakfast. Everything was fine.

(Arguably, everything was not fine)

Lyf sits down at the table, Ivy on one side of him and Marius on the other. Lyf remembers Ivy, the one who fixed the Black Box for them, and they also spot Raphaella sitting next to her. They remember her too (they’d know those wings anywhere).

“Edda.” Ivy greets. “Good to see you up and about. I calculated a 64% chance you would be joining us this morning.”

“Yes, I- I guess it’s good to see you again.” Lyf says. Ivy and Raphaella they had been able to tolerate a bit more than Marius. All three had honestly been a pain for them to deal with on a regular basis, but at least neither of them ever made instruments materialize out of nowhere.

She’s smiling at them, but then a puzzled look crosses her face. “Edda, your eyes- what happened to them? They weren’t like that before.”

Of course. Of course someone else was going to notice. Lyf turns their gaze down, trying to avoid drawing attention from anyone else.

“I think they look nice.” Marius chimes in. Lyf can’t tell if that was supposed to be a jab or a genuine compliment. “Don’t they look nice?”

“What did you do, von Raum?”

“Nothing! Why do you think I had something to do with it?”

“Raphaella, look at this-”

The familiar voice of Raphaella adds in, “Hm? Oh, Ivy, you’re right-”

Lyf can’t deal with this.

“Don’t.” Lyf interrupts, still keeping their eyes turned downward. “It just- I’m not sure how it happened, but it happened. Suppose it was too much to hope for to get away without...” They trail off, deciding not to give any of them reason to toss them back into space.

“Leave them be.” A new voice says. They don’t look to see who. “If they do not wish to talk about it, they do not have to. Now, I have only been back five years, but I hear they’ve gone through a lot, and I’m sure we can all relate. Lyfrassir is our guest, no?”

“Only because these two insisted on keeping them.” Jonny cuts in. He means Marius and Ivy likely. Lyf dares a glance over at Jonny, only to see him watching them with a cautious expression. He probably realized something was up; it was pretty drastic to have eyes change from brown to silver, and they knew he already suspected that Lyf had been affected by the Bifrost.

“I for one am glad to see you again, Lyf.” Raphaella offered. “Good to see you made it out in one piece.”

In one piece. Ha. Sure. They’re starting to doubt that.

Lyf tries to not think about it, to focus on something else. There was already some food set out on the table, but someone who Lyf assumes is Brian comes around and sets out more. Soon after, there’s a plate set in front of them with pancakes and bacon, followed by a mug of something. Tea maybe?

“I set this aside for you in case you happened to join us. Hope this is to your liking.” Brian tells them before taking a seat next to Marius.

“Thanks...” Lyf manages.

They feel a little out of place as they watch everyone else grab at more of the food that Brian had set out on the table, but at least no one’s tried to kill them yet. Maybe everything would be fine after all. Marius said this was meant to be a sort of introduction to the rest of the crew, right?

“Syrup for the pancakes, Lyf?”

They blink, realizing it was Marius who had spoken to them. They just shook their head, managing out a quiet, “I’m fine with just this.”

“Alright. Feel free to help yourself though; there’s plenty to go around.”

Someone else’s voice catches their attention then. “-Ivy, have you told Lyf yet?”

Lyf looks back to Ivy. “Told me what?”

“Oh, yes. Thank you for reminding me, dear.” She turns to address them. “I was going to tell you yesterday, but you were already asleep again by the time I got down to the medbay. I’ve decided to make you my assistant!”

“What?!”

“Yes, starting today.” Ivy confirms.

“When was this decided?”

“She decided that when we found you. It was her idea.” Marius answers, pointing to Ivy.

“Hey, at least it’ll give you something to do. You stay here, you make yourself useful.” Jonny tells Lyf, gesturing at them with a fork.

“Cheer up, Lyf.” Marius tries, nudging them with his elbow. “It may be boring work, but you’ve still got me!”

“My home got eaten up by some cosmic horror from the Bifrost, my eyes have turned silver overnight, and now I’m in the company of you lot, one of which is claiming me as an assistant. Oh, what has my life become?”

“Stop moping and eat up.” Then Jonny adds, “By the way, now’s a perfect time to introduce you to the rest of the crew. You already know myself, Marius, Raphaella, and Ivy; our medic, science officer, and archivist respectively. This one here is Nastya, engineer of the _Aurora;_ recently returned to us _._ ”

Jonny gestures to the woman next to him, who’s giving Lyf a smile.

“Welcome aboard, Lyfrassir.” She greets. Lyf recognizes her voice as the one who had tried to ease everyone off from asking them about the changing of their eye color. “Aurora has asked me to pass on a greeting from her as well.”

“The- you mean the ship?”

“Yes. She is my girlfriend.”

“Your...” Lyf doesn’t even want to begin thinking about what sort of arrangement that was, but given they were in the company of people who were supposedly immortal, it was better to accept it as part of this weird new existence. “Nevermind. Let her know I say hello as well.”

“Continuing on,” Jonny picks up. “Over here is Gunpowder Tim; master of arms.”

“The one who blew up my ship?” Lyf asks, remembering the name.

“It was practically running on fumes after the systems crashed.” Tim answers with a shrug. “It was fun to destroy though.”

Continuing on-

“Ashes O’ Riley; quartermaster.”

“Nice to meet you, Lyf.” Ashes says in greeting. “By the way, I think the silver in your eyes is nice.”

“I already said that, Ashes!” Marius cuts in.

And finally-

“And Drumbot Brian; pilot.”

Lyf looks over to the person on the other side of Marius, who is now confirmed to be Brian. He doesn’t say anything, but gives a kind nod to Lyf.

“There’s also the Toy Solider…” Jonny adds. “Though I’m not sure where it is, and I don’t care to know.”

Those are all the introductions, so Lyf supposes it’s their turn now. Would only make sense, right?

“Okay… So… You’ve probably heard of me from the three that were there, but I’m Lyfrassir Edda. Former Inspector Second Class. I go by “Lyf” as well, if that suits you. I’m… I’m a bit far from home, it would seem. Not like there’s anything to go back to.”

“Does that mean you’ll be staying with us for a while?” Tim asked.

“I suppose so. Not the most ideal, but what options do I have at this point?”

“You Can Always Come Float In Space With Me~!” A cheery voice from behind Lyf calls.

The voice startles them bad, nearly causing them to fall out of their seat as they turn around to see someone (or something- is it some kind of living wooden doll?) wearing some kind of military uniform smiling at them. It doesn’t stop smiling. Everyone else around Lyf seems unfazed.

“Christ, TS- don’t do that.” Marius says to it. “You’re gonna give poor Lyf a heart attack. And you’re technically not alive. Lyf is, and they’re mortal.”

“I-It’s- um- It’s okay, von Raum. Uh...” Despite the sudden appearance of this newcomer making their heart rate jump, they try to compose themself to properly greet this- Marius called them TS, right? “TS… Are- Is your name Toy Solider?”

“I Am!” It replies. “And You Are Inspector Lyfrassir, Yes?”

“Former. There’s no need for the title anymore.”

“Jolly Good! I’m So Happy You’ve Decided To Join Our Crew, Lyfrassir.”

“You seem… nice, TS, but I didn’t have much choice in the matter. And no one has decided anything of the sort! I just- I just ended up here.”

“Oh. Well, You’ll Like It! Would You Like Some Tea With Teeth?”

Lyf’s taken aback. “E-Excuse me?”

“Give it a rest, TS.” Raphaella says. “Lyf’s still trying to get settled. Speaking of which, are you feeling any better, Lyf? You were in a bit of a bad way when we found you.”

They lean forward and look over at her. “A bit better, I guess.”

“Good. Like Marius said, help yourself to some food. Suppose you’re a bit hungry right about now.”

Lyf only offered up a weak smile, and all at once the conversations they had walked into before started back up again. TS had joined the rest of the group at the table (sitting next to Nastya) and watched them all with its constant smile. Lyf tried to eat some of the food that was given to him (which wasn’t that bad actually), and listened in on the conversations.

Lyf barely spoke unless one of the others wanted to ask them something, but all in all, it wasn’t as terrible as they thought it would be. Ideally, none of this was what Lyf was expecting or could of hoped for, not to mention other things that were still bouncing around in their head and weighing on their heart. They supposed things could be worse.

Nastya is now issuing a reminder about something she’s only referring to as “date night”, which is apparently happening in a few days, and to which everyone collectively whines about. A small smile flashes across Lyf’s face, amused.

‘ _This is… nice.’_ They think. They’re not sure why; maybe it’s the feeling of wanting interaction with someone, anyone, after around a week and a half drifting alone in space with nothing but themself, the void, and of course the nightmares.

So maybe this is nice, in some weird bizarre way. Lyf certainly never thought they’d be having breakfast with space pirates though, that’s for sure.

Though, Lyf does eventually witnesses one of the stranger things about the Mechanisms

They’re finishing up one of their pancakes when Tim makes a snarky comment to Jonny (and also making Lyf laugh a tiny bit). The result of that is Jonny pulling out a pistol, pointing it at Tim, and shooting him in the chest.

Tim falls over dead, pushed away onto the floor by Jonny. Everyone else seems unaffected by this, and Toy Solider just laughs like it’s a joke. Lyf, meanwhile, is stunned.

“...What the fuck- why?!” Lyf exclaims.

“Calm down, Lyf; he’ll be fine.” Ashes assures them, and then addresses the rest of the group. “Did none of you tell them we’re all immortal?”

“I did.” Jonny replies. “Not my fault they didn’t believe me.”

“It’s not the easiest thing to believe!”

“Edda, we were in that prison for 60 years.” Ivy says. “And before that we spent 20 years running all over Yggdrasil. Why do you think we never aged, or that it was so hard to catch us? You’ve looked into the Black Box and beheld its horrible and strange secrets; is immortality really such a stretch from what you’ve seen?”

“I mean after he told me I just assumed you all didn’t physically age and you might have ridiculously long lifespans. Also Tim just fell over dead after Jonny shot him! Doesn’t seem very immortal to me!”

“ ‘M not dead. Ugh… thanks for that, Jonny.” Tim’s voice suddenly sounds.

Lyf was shocked to see Tim rise up from the floor, push some hair out of his face, and then sit back down at the table like nothing happened.

They stared at him with wide eyes, dizzy at the fact that Tim is indeed _still alive_ and _not dead_ after being _shot_.

“Again… What. The. Fuck.”

A beat of silence passes and the a few laughs echo around the table.

“See, Lyf; we can’t die.” Jonny says, looking just a bit smug, and pleased with Lyf’s reaction. “Not truly.”

If Lyf hadn’t seen so much weird shit within the past few weeks, they might have fainted right then and then from seeing someone come back to life. Though they are in a bit of a shock over this development. They should have figured when Jonny had said they were all immortal, he meant it in every sense of the word.

“O-Okay- That’s- That’s great.” Lyf gets out, still processing what had just happened. “So, you- none of you can actually die; permanently die.”

“Nope!”

“We can be killed, but we don’t stay that way for long.” Ashes tells them. “We always come back, and we tend to heal very quickly. We’re a pretty tough group to tie down, so we can have as much fun as we want.”

“Right.” That gives Lyf a thought. “Wait- Von Raum, you and Raphaella and Ivy showed up after the train disappeared. You went about doing whatever you three wanted for two decades before being captured. Or rather- did you let yourselves be captured?”

“Sort of. There was a trap set on one of the last places we hit and collectively decided to just roll with it. We needed a vacation from this lot anyway.”

“And I assume you could have left at any time. Why stay?”

“Well...” There was something in Marius’s tone that read to Lyf as possibly hesitant. “We… had our reasons.”

“Come on, Marius,” Raphaella interrupts. “We all know _your_ reason was just so you could continue to tease Lyf and flirt with them.”

Lyf nearly chokes on their drink they’d just taken a sip from.

“That’s-That’s not it at all, Raph! I just- I didn’t want to leave you guys behind to be bored while waiting for the train, which hadn’t even shown up yet.”

“Mmhm. Sure.”

“Are you alright, Edda?” Ivy’s voice comes from beside them, softly.

“Yes, I-I’m fine.” They weakly offer. “Swallowed wrong.”

The conversation is continuing still between Raphaella and Ivy, and has slightly switched track. Nastya is asking if this has something to do with a “new story to tell”.

“...we were still talking about pitching the idea to Jonny about using this for a new story for the band.” Marius is saying to her. “I still want to play Thor.”

“Of course _you_ want to play Thor.” Tim retorts. “If you get Thor, then _I_ get Loki.”

“I call Odin!” Raphaella adds.

“Good choice.” Ashes comments. “I call Sigyn. From what I heard, she sounded badass.”

“I already told you guys we’re going through with it.” Jonny confirms. “We can work it out once we’re far enough away from Yggdrasil. We should have been farther by now, but you all wanted to stop at Hoddmimis first.”

“We had time still before the Bifrost reached the colony, according to Ivy, and I got to burn down that mining rig. That was fun.”

“Wait, wait.” Something clicks for Lyf when he says that and they look over at Jonny. “Is _that_ why you want my story about what happened? For your _band_?”

“I told you, we collect stories, and yours is interesting. You should hear some of the other tales we’ve found. I usually narrate all our stories we play too, so...”

They quickly catch onto the implication. Now Lyf’s annoyed more than anything. “You’re the worst.”

* * *

At least breakfast continues on without anybody else getting shot and/or temporarily killed. Though someone promises that they’re going to find more “aesthetically fitting” clothes for Lyf when they’re next planetside (which will be in a few days since “date night” also means everyone else tends to stay far away from the ship while Nastya has some time alone with Aurora).

Once breakfast is done, Ivy quickly drags them off in, presumably, the direction of her library. At this point, Lyf resigns themself to follow along.

“Why do you need me to be your assistant anyway?” Lyf asks her as they walk through the corridors.

“No particular reason.” She replies. “But those 60 years I spent with the others stuck in one place didn’t exactly allow me time to sort through everything I’ve gathered from the Yggdrasil system. And the when you said the train had finally arrived- we made a break for it right after you left with the Black Box. We’ve survived things we probably shouldn’t have, but we certainly didn’t want to stick around to get caught up in what we knew would eventually happen.”

“It’s been almost 2 weeks since then. Wouldn’t that have been enough time to get to sorting everything?”

“You forget it took 20 years to be able to capture us, and that was _only 3_ of our crew. I have a lot to sort. Besides, the library is always changing with every new place we go to; with every new find. I was only getting started when we pulled your ship in.”

“So I was a convenient act of happenstance?”

“Yes. Admittedly, I could use the help with all the new things for the collection, and my calculations showed a high chance you would be up for the task. However, I also knew von Raum would like to keep you around as well. He missed you, no matter how much he says otherwise.”

Lyf doesn’t say anything, fidgeting again with the ring on their finger.

‘ _Really? Von Raum missed me?’_ They thought to themself. It makes them think back to what Marius said yesterday about almost having come back to whisk Lyf away before everything dissolved into a multicolored nightmare. The thought creates an odd flutter in their chest. Weird… but not… it’s not unpleasant.

Eventually they arrive at a door, and Ivy opens it, holding the door open for Lyf.

“Welcome to my library.” Ivy says. “Or the Collection, as I sometimes call it.”

Lyf takes the invitation and crosses the threshold, stepping into the room and Ivy following behind them.

The room is much bigger than expected, and looks to be an honest to Gods library. It might have once been a store room, judging by the size, but it’s clear Ivy has transformed it into something of her own making. There are a great number of shelves with all sorts of books, and there’s a few desks scattered about with various books and paper. They spot one desk in particular that is piled with books, and even more books sit in stacks around it.

“This is… impressive.” Lyf comments, still looking around. “I’m guessing the desk over there with all the books has some of the things you picked up in Yggdrasil.”

“Some of it, but there is more.” Ivy explains with a smile. It’s clear to Lyf she’s proud of this collection. “Don’t worry, I’ll have plenty of things for you to go through, and I’ll show you how I organize the library for when you’re doing the cataloging. You’re welcome to come by whenever you like if you’re looking for something to read or research.”

“Thank you, Ivy.” Lyf says, sincere.

“Oh, there’s also some stuff from Midgard on that desk over there if you want to take a look. I set them aside for you yesterday since I thought they might cheer you up a bit.”

That immediately catches their attention. Lyf quickly walks over to the desk to take a look at some of the books. Indeed they recognizes some of them as ones that talk about the music and art of Midgard. They’re careful turning the pages, lingering on each one as if they’re grasping some tiny fragile fragment of what was their home.

It makes them want to cry.

“Edda?” Ivy calls to them. “...Lyf?”

Lyf managed to pull themself back from the books and finds Ivy standing beside them.

“Sorry. It’s…” They’re still trying not to cry. “You saved something of my world, my home, and that’s- It means a lot.”

“I’m glad to hear it, but are you alright? You don’t look it.”

“...These things are here, and I’m grateful you have them, but everything I knew is gone, and it’s been hard on me. I’m glad, but at the same time it hurts. I’m literally the last of the Yggdrasil system, and it’s a lot to deal with, among other things.”

She nods, as if she understands. “I’ll let you in on something, Edda. All of us here- we all have things in our heads that still linger around us, even all these many, many years later. We’ve been through a lot too. We may look like we’re having fun half the time, but we weren’t always immortal. I’d rather not go into detail regarding that, but I will say that much. I understand you have your own hardships and that recent events have not been kind to you.”

Given their past interactions with her, Marius, and Raphaella on Midgard, this put things in a different perspective for Lyf. They’ve always loathed the three of them- Marius being a nuisance, Ivy always so analytical, and Raphaella with a curiosity that bordered into mad scientist territory. But now… Well, Marius still managed to get on their nerves, but maybe they weren’t as awful as they had first thought.

“I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

She seems satisfied with that response. “Maybe you should talk to von Raum. For all his talk about claiming to be a doctor or a psychiatrist or whatever, he’d probably be willing to listen to all these existential thoughts of yours. You may not know this, Edda, but he’s fond of you.”

Lyf scoffs. “Von Raum fond of _me?_ ”

“Well, not just him. Myself and Raphaella as well, but Marius seemed to always like you the most out of us three. You were always interesting to us, but to him especially.”

They can feel heat rise to their cheeks at this thought. To think that someone is fond of them, especially given that it’s Marius- is that really true? They can’t imagine that it is, but...

Lyf coughs to clear their throat and to change the subject. “Right. If I’m going to be your assistant for… however long I’m to be here for, then I guess I should ask you to show me what I will be doing here.”

* * *

Lyf listens patiently while Ivy explains more about the library to them, and how she goes about organizing and cataloging things. Though it’s a lot of information to take in at first, Lyf appreciates all the care she takes with this library. They could get used to it here, which surprises themself, given they are traveling with space pirates.

Sometime later, Ashes lets them know there’s a spare room that they can take up. Lyf thanks Ashes quietly and spends the afternoon getting settled in. They make use of the shower in the adjoining bathroom and follow up that with a brief nap.

Lyf does find themself still flinching whenever they catch their reflection in something. It’s the sight of their now silver eyes. It’s a small change that’s happened to them, but it’s the hypothesis of why it occurred that worries them.

Later, they’re putting up their photos up on a wall next to the bed, the ones they’d grabbed in their rush to flee Midgard, when there’s a knock at the door.

“Hey, Lyf, you there?”

Lyf sets down the photos and sighs. Marius.

Lyf almost doesn’t want to bother, but they remember what Ivy said earlier. In light of that, Lyf decided he can humor the man. Why he was here, they didn’t know.

Going over to the door, they open it and greet Marius in the typical fashion. “Von Raum.”

“Good evening, _former_ Inspector Lyf.” Marius replies, adding a bit of dramatic flare to the greeting. “You settling in okay? Ashes told me you’d be here.”

“Yes, I’m-” Lyf looks down at the photos still in their hands and then back to Marius. “I’m fine. Why are you here?”

“Just letting you know dinner’s gonna be ready soon. You’re more than welcome to join us.”

“Oh. Thank you for letting me know.” A moment of awkward silence passes between them, and Lyf taps their photos against their hand. “I’m just- um- I’m going to finish putting these up.”

“Photos?”

“Grabbed them before I left Midgard.” They shuffle them and look down at the photo on top. They freeze. It’s the photo of them with their sister, Lisbeth.

The picture makes their heart ache. Earlier when they first started putting up the photos, they’d spent five minutes in a small fit of tears when they came across that one. Lyf wanted to hope the report had somehow reached her, but she had been in Svartalfheim with her wife when Lyf begun their investigation on the Ratatosk. Lyf knew better. There was no way she caught word.

Lose your home, lose your entire star system, lose your family. Thanks, Bifrost.

“Lyf?”

Marius calling their name snaps them out of their dark revere. “Sorry. It’s just-” Lyf holds up the photo. “That’s me and my sister, Lisbeth.”

“Were you guys close?” Marius asks.

“Yeah… Just another part of my life eaten up by the squamous things between spaces.” Not wanting to break out into tears again, they flip to a different photo, one that brings a brief smile to their face. “Had a cat too.”

They show Marius, and he looks at it skeptically. “Is that what cats are supposed to look like?”

Lyf frowns. “What do you mean? Of course that’s what cats look like. Don’t any of you have pets?”

“I mean, there are the octokittens, but they’re more like pests we can’t get rid of.”

Octo- what? Octo… kittens. That’s a new one…

“Er, okay then…”

"What? They're real. They attack when you least expect it. Did I ever tell you one tried to eat me and now it has a taste for my blood?"

"No..." They changed the subject. “So, dinner. Do the rest of the crew really want me there?”

“I think they like you well enough. I guess you’re technically one of us anyway since you’ll be working with Ivy.”

“Have you forgotten the part where I’m not immortal like you all are?”

“Come on, it’ll be fine. You survived breakfast, didn’t you?”

Well, that was true. And maybe, since they were definitely sure they would be aboard this ship for an extended amount of time, they should try and familiarize themselves with the Mechanisms more.

“Alright. Sure...”

* * *

On the way to dinner, Lyf does in fact encounter the octokittens when three fall out of a vent and onto them, sending them crashing to the floor. Two scramble away a moment later, while one remains cuddling Lyf’s leg.

“Oh my Gods, you were being serious?!” They exclaim.

Marius is standing to the side watching all this, laughing while Lyf works at prying the thing off their leg. After a few minutes, it releases Lyf, gives a strange meow, and scurries off to… wherever.

“That was frightening…” They say aloud to themself.

“I told you the octokittens were real. And that they’re pests.”

“Well, they’re certainly unlike anything I’ve ever seen.” Of course there had been nothing like octokittens in Yggdrasil, not that they knew of anyway. Lyf doesn’t consider them squamous, but they’d been shocked enough when they dropped onto their head from a vent.

“Need a hand?”

Lyf looks over and sees Marius offering a hand to them once again. It’s reminiscent of this morning when Lyf had sent them both falling to the ground after an attempt to take another violin from Marius.

This time, Lyf is not so hesitant in taking his hand.

All Marius gives them is a smile as they get to their feet, and they continue on.

‘ _Maybe he’s not as bad as I thought either.’_ Lyf thinks to themself.

* * *

Around 1:40 AM, Lyf nearly falls out of their bed after being torn from a nightmare of rainbows and eyes. Two minutes later they actually do scramble out of bed and into the bathroom to be sick. Ten minutes following that, they stumble back to bed and curl up into a ball on top of it.

Damn these nightmares. Lyf was so sick of it; literally and figuratively, and their eyes turning silver on top of all this wasn’t helping.

Lyf shivers, and they reach over to grab the blanket still lying nearby and cocoon themself in it. They feel cold.

The images of the nightmare are still very present in Lyf’s mind, and are still causing rainbow spots to dance around their vision. They see the tendrils of a thousand different colors they can’t even comprehend reaching for them, trying to sink into them. They remember something calling to them from far off, and they had tried to block out the noise so desperately. They remember a hallway (looking too much like the inside of the one of the carriages of the train) with windows full of eyes; watching them always.

They still feel like they’re being watched; that something sees them and is taking some kind of sick pleasure in seeing them suffer like this.

A choked sob comes from Lyf’s throat and tears come to their eyes. Sure, after what they’ve seen, they should have expected the nightmares. It’s trauma; they know it is. They’ve looked into the Black Box and something looked back. Their whole star system was consumed by the swirling madness of the Bifrost. Of course, they’re going to be left with trauma and nightmares born of it to say the least. But these- these are bad, and they shake Lyf to their core. They hate these visions so much.

What’s more is that they only serve to remind Lyf of everything they’ve lost, and that makes the tears spill over.

It hurt. Everything fucking hurt.

Lyf doesn’t go back to sleep after that.

* * *

Marius is a bit surprised to find Lyf alone in the kitchen. It was his turn to make breakfast and he’d come in to get started before the rest of the Mechs showed up. Lyf’s already here though, sitting at the table with their book and an empty metal mug. Their hair looks messy again and there’s a blank look on their face. In fact, Lyf looked like they’d barely slept.

“Uh, Lyf?” He calls.

That seems to break Lyf from their trance. They blink, then look up at him.

“Hm? Oh. Von Raum.”

“Good morning to you too.” Marius replies, sitting down across from them. “Didn’t expect to find you here so early.”

Lyf shrugs. “Didn’t sleep well. I… I’m still getting used to this place. I thought maybe if there was any coffee lying around I could help myself to that but I realized I didn’t know where you all keep it. I don’t even know if any of you own a coffee machine. I decided to read from my book instead.” They sighed and rubbed at their eyes; still silver. “I may have spaced out and read the same page over once. What are you doing here?”

“My turn to make breakfast today. Me and Brian alternate.”

“Didn’t know you cooked, von Raum.”

“I am a man of many talents.”

“Does one of them include pretending to be a doctor?”

“Lyfrassir, you wound me!” Marius exclaims with more flair than necessary, feigning hurt.

Lyf’s looking back down at their book, but there was the hint of a smile on their face. Rarely had Marius ever seen Lyf smile, even back on Midgard. Scowls, smirks, annoyed pouts- yes. Smiles were more rare from Lyf, especially such a gentle one.

But, as if a spell is broken, the smile is gone in an instant; replaced by that tired look. Shame, really; it was nice to see them smiling for once.

“Want me to make you up something before the others get here?” Marius asks.

Lyf doesn’t meet his eyes. “I can wait. It’s fine.”

Marius isn’t too sure about that. Something’s off. “It’s not a problem. It might even help if you’re still not feeling all there.”

“Nothing’s wrong, von Raum. I didn’t sleep well. That’s it.”

He still thinks there’s something else there, but he sees Lyf’s hands have started to tremble. Perhaps best to leave it be for now.

“Right… I’m going to start cooking some things up. Just yell if you want something.” He gets up from the table and starts gathering things from around the kitchen to make breakfast.

Lyf is silent as he works, and Marius briefly wonders if they’ve fallen asleep. They look so tired; not as bad as when Ivy found Lyf in that ship the other day, but still a bit out of it. Marius pauses in his cooking momentarily to glance at Lyf, and he sees they’ve opened their book. Just reading then. He continues working on breakfast, but there’s something about this silence that bothers him. He can’t exactly place it, but maybe it’s just because he’s too used to the days when Lyf would show up at the prison; too used to having the silence filled with their own banter.

Putting a couple eggs in a frying pan, Marius informs Lyf, “If you’re feeling a little stir crazy, we’ll be landing on a planet soon. Stopping for supplies, causing a little chaos, getting far away from the ship while Nastya and Aurora have their “date night”. I recommend you not be here for that last one.”

Still nothing from Lyf, not even some sort of snarky remark (or hell, he was even expecting Lyf to be asking for further clarification of “date night”). Marius sort of gives up on trying to get anything out of them. He may hang around with some of the most chaotic bastards he’s ever known, but he’s not heartless. Lyf clearly doesn’t want to talk, so he’ll leave it be-

“….Do you have any tea?”

It’s quiet but he hears it.

Marius pauses glances back at Lyf. They haven’t moved from their spot, but Marius knows he heard them speak. He finds himself staring at the way Lyf has their hair done up a moment longer than necessary. Still no braids, but even pulled back in a lose messy bun it looks nice.

Still, he smiles to himself, happily replying, “Coming right up!”

Marius grabs the empty mug that had been on the table and gets some water boiling in the kettle in between everything else he’s doing. Once the water’s warmed up, he pours it in the mug and sets a teabag inside. Halting in the cooking, he grabs the mug and places it next to Lyf.

“It’s still hot.” He warns.

Lyf’s gaze drifts over to the mug, and then up at Marius. Their mouth opens, but nothing is spoken. Lyf then turns back to the mug and they duck their head.

“Thanks.” It still comes out quiet, but Marius counts this as a win.

He returns back to the cooking, and more importantly making sure the eggs don’t fry. He had a feeling Lyf would never let him live it down if that happened. He starts to hum a song, and a few minutes later he hears Lyf give an exasperated sigh.

“It’s too early for this, von Raum.” They gripe.

“Oh, I disagree! Never too early. You should see us when we all get drunk, then it turns into a party.”

“Oh Gods, I can only imagine...”

Ivy and Raphaella come into the kitchen shortly after, greeting both him and Lyf. Marius chats with them both while he continues to cook, and soon enough everyone finds their way to the kitchen.

Lyf still doesn’t speak much over the course of breakfast, they read and eat their food for the most part, but they gradually seem to grow more relaxed. Marius can’t help but spare glances at Lyf, secretly hoping to catch a trace of that smile again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be more Lyf & Marius interactions/shenanigans in the next chapter; promise ;)


	3. It Makes It All Different (For Me)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marius comes to a realization, the Mechs go planetside (what crimes will they commit?), and Lyf & Marius get closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from the song Maya, by The Church
> 
> This chapter is a bit longer than the others, but after moving some stuff around for another chapter and then going back to do this one, I'm just "screw it" and decided to see where this went.

They find themselves spending most of the day in the library again.

It’s partially because of their new position as Ivy’s assistant, which means tending to the various materials of the library and those that still needed to be sorted. The latter meaning all the things Ivy had gathered from across the Yggdrasil system, which turned out to be a lot. Lyf was more than happy to look through everything, pieces of the world they knew. Pieces were all they were in the end, as it really wasn’t the same as all those who gave the things in these pieces life and meaning. Still, there was some strange comfort in it, to know not everything was lost.

It doesn’t erase the fact that Lyf now carries the knowledge and legacy of their home within them, remembered by them, but they’ll take it.

The other reason is because Lyf actually likes the library; it’s quickly become their favorite place on the ship. It’s quiet, save for the ever present hum of Aurora, and Lyf can slip away to here and be among the many books here. Lyf assumes this is where Ivy spends most of her time as well, as they’ll often see her wandering about or organizing something. It is her library after all, constantly changing with her discoveries. Lyf appreciates she’s allowed them to come by whenever they please; it’s a wonderful library.

And while not terribly cozy, Lyf feels at least somewhat safe here, as they’ve more often heard some commotion from somewhere on the ship. It was for the most part a mixture of gunshots, yelling, singing, and various instruments. Lyf isn’t sure they want to know half the time, but they’d also prefer not to get shot at.

There of course is still the matter of what to do about what Ivy’s brought here from Yggdrasil. Lyf’s suggested that they begin by sorting all the materials by planet and then going from there. Ivy’s already begun making a space in the library for this new section, and Lyf is more than happy to help her if need be. It keeps Lyf’s mind and hands busy, keeps them distracted from other things that they’d rather not think about.

Sometime in the afternoon (approximately, because time is weird here with no clear night or day) Lyf is sorting through items regarding Midgard and Asgard, and Ivy is still working on rearranging the library to account for all the new books. They’re currently skimming through a book of Midgardian poetry, and they think that maybe they should write some poetry of their own again; as a small way of trying to deal with everything that they’ve been through. It might help, even just a little, and they know Ivy has some empty books lying around for notetaking.

It’s in the middle of this thought that someone distracts Lyf from their reading by calling out their name-

“Good afternoon, Lyf!”

Lyf nearly drops their book in surprise, but looks up to see Marius standing in front of the desk.

“Von Raum.” They reply plainly. “Why are you here? I wouldn’t have placed you as someone that hangs around a library.”

“What? Even I like a good book once in a while.” He replies

Lyf gives him a skeptical look. “Are you up to something? Hiding from someone?”

“Me? Uh… Nope! Totally not. I just- I wanted to see what you doing!”

They turn their eyes back down to their book. “I’ve found I like to spend time here, and not just because I am Ivy’s assistant now. If you’re that curious as to what I’m doing, I suggested to Ivy that we should sort materials in the Yggdrasil collection by planet. I’m going through some things from Midgard and Asgard currently. Though Asgard was a bit more reclusive than our other planets given it was the seat of our system’s government as well as home to Asgardian royalty, which makes me wonder how Ivy managed to get a hold of some of this stuff.”

“She worked something out. Speaking of which- remind me to tell you about the time we were hanging around Asgard.”

Lyf’s gaze flickers up. “Do I even want to know why you were there?”

Marius shrugged. “Seemed fun, and we were still charting out the system. So… you reading something interesting?”

“It’s a book of Midgardian poetry; something I personally enjoy.”

“That’s… Interesting?”

“If you’re going to mock me over my reading choices-”

“No, not at all! I just didn’t think you were the kind of person to be into poetry.”

“Oh...”

Okay, so maybe Lyf was a person that kept to themself most of the time, and back on Midgard they had gotten more than one comment about being a workaholic, but that didn’t mean Lyf didn’t have interests. They liked poetry for example, and they did write from time to time, but they hadn’t written since before the reappearance of the Ratatosk.

They realized they had let slip that interest, and Marius had clearly picked up on that, but to Lyf’s surprise, he didn’t look at them as if it was something silly. Actually, he looked… curious. That was… interesting.

It made Lyf wonder if possibly, Marius might- _‘Nope. No way. Don’t even think about it. He wouldn’t like your poetry anyway.’_

“What are you doing here, von Raum?” Ivy’s voice breaks through the quiet.

Lyf turns their head to see Ivy walking out from a row of bookcases. There are a couple books and a datapad cradled in her arms.

“Ivy! Good to see you!” Marius exclaims, a little too quickly. “How are you doing on this fine day-”

“You’re not one to usually come by the library. What did you do this time?”

“Whatever do you mean, Ivy?”

She sighs. “Tim has been going on about you in the group chat. Specifically regarding that his favorite coat has octokitten fur on it and that you interrupted him while he was in deep concentration on cleaning his guns.”

Lyf doesn’t know Tim that well yet, but considering the man is the crew’s master of arms, and that Lyf has heard Tim does not like to be interrupted while cleaning his various weapons- “Von Raum, what did you do?”

Marius holds his hands up in front of him. “There’s a completely logical explanation! The octokittens!”

“The octokittens.” Ivy repeats, sounding unconvinced.

“Like the ones that fell out of the vent and the one that proceeded to cling to my leg?” Lyf adds.

“That one likes you for some reason. Anyway, I went to ask Tim something, but he was too busy cleaning. He had his coat set on the table and I guess he was too busy to notice an octcokitten decided to nap on it. I went to remove the octokitten and to give Tim back his coat, but it decided to meow loudly and jump onto my face. I may or may not have accidentally flung the octokitten at Tim.”

Ivy shakes her head. “You’re an idiot.”

“I was just trying to salvage it from the octokittens! And the pest is fine, by the way. It ran off somewhere, and now that I think about it, I think that was the same one that decided to try and cuddle Lyf-”

“To the point. You thought you’d hide in the library.”

“Maybe.”

“Go hide somewhere else; I don’t want any bullet holes in my books.”

“I would also like to not get shot.” Lyf adds, just for their own sake.

“That would be bad.” Ivy agrees. “While I’m at it, Edda-” She sets down the books and data pad down on the desk and retrieved her phone. “Let me add you to our group chat. I realize we haven’t added you yet.”

“What? But I don’t have a-”

“The datapad I gave you can get you access; we have our own server for our group chat. We’ll pick you up a phone when we’re planetside again.”

“This cannot possibly end well.”

“As fun as it will be to see everyone’s reactions to Lyf being added to the group-” Marius interrupts. “Can I hide here until Tim calms down?”

“No.” Ivy reiterates. “You and I both know he won’t calm down until he gets at least one shot in you. You can go explain yourself, since it’s likely you haven’t done so yet. You’ll be fine.”

“Fine. I’ll just go hang out with Raphaella for a while.” Marius glances back at Lyf. “Probably best if you stay clear of me for a bit. I wouldn’t want you to get caught in any crossfire.”

“I’d prefer not to die due to whatever nonsense you all get up to, thank you.” They say.

“I, uh, guess I’ll leave you to your books then.”

“Hm. I’ll be here.”

“Yeah… Uh, If you don’t see me at dinner, blame Tim.”

Marius leaves the library, presumably to go find Raphaella, who is most likely in her lab. Lyf leans back in their chair, wondering if things like this were just something that happened on a regular basis.

“Does this happen a lot around here?” Lyf asks, looking over at Ivy. But… she’s… smiling at them? “Er, Ivy?”

“Yes?”

“What’s with the smile?”

“Oh, nothing for you to be concerned about. You two are interesting to observe.”

“Ah… okay...”

* * *

Eventually, Tim does find him, shoots him once, and warns against throwing another octokitten at him.

“What the hell did you want me for anyway?” Tim asks when Marius is back on his feet.

“Wanted to see if you knew any good jokes.” He says.

“What?”

“Jokes? You got anything good I can use or what?”

“No. What is this about?”

“Er… No reason…?”

Tim looks at him questionably. “Wait… is this about Lyf?”

“Um...”

“Oh Christ. Honestly, I’m surprised you haven’t said anything to them yet.”

Marius frowns at him. “What do you mean?”

“You went on and on about Lyf when we brought you back aboard, rather it seemed you might have been upset that you didn’t go back for them.” There’s a slight smirk on his face at that last part. “You wouldn’t shut up about them for the better part of a full day. And don’t say it’s nothing; that’s not just nothing, my friend.”

“Look, I missed Lyf, okay? They were good company while we were stuck on Midgard and I honestly thought they were dead. But they’re not; Lyf’s alive. I’m- I’m actually really glad they’re alive.”

Tim’s still got that smirk on his face. “You know you’re smiling, right?” Marius goes to say something, but Tim cuts him off with a chuckle. “I’ve got nothing to help, unfortunately. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going back to cleaning my guns. They need to stay in perfect condition.”

* * *

Marius goes off to see Raphaella instead.

“You wanted to ask Tim if he knew any jokes?” She asks, a laugh in her voice. “For what reason?”

He sighs. She’d probably quickly figure out why as well, so best to just come right out with it. “Lyf. I wanna see if I can make them laugh. You ever see them when they laugh?”

“Of course this is about Lyf. Yes, once; quite adorable.”

“Exactly! And yesterday when I went to make breakfast I found them already there and they just looked- I don’t know. They still looked half asleep and the messy hair was a kind of nice look for them, but they looked like…. Well, Lyf didn’t say anything, but they looked like they had a rough night. But- Raph- Lyf _smiled_ ; just for a second! You and Ivy were with me for those 60 years, you know how rare it is to see Lyf smile!”

“Yes, because for the most part, you were too busy flirting with them by way of violins. And they were always trying to take said violins.”

“They smiled, and it was… it was nice.” Marius continues. “They look good with a smile. Yeah, I know they’ve been through some shit, but I want- I don’t know… It would be nice to see them do that again, or laugh.”

He finishes that sentence with a wistful sigh, and the next thing he knows there’s hands on either side of his face. Raphaella, of course.

“Oh goodness.” She says, amused. “Marius, you know me and Ivy love you dearly, but you are really a fool sometimes.”

“Huh?”

“You like Lyfrassir. More than that even.”

Marius blinks at her, and then removes her hands. “Raph-”

“Don’t deny it.” She insists, poking him on the nose. “You were in such a slump after we left Midgard; didn’t even join us for some fun on Hoddmimis before the Bifrost ate it. Even back in the prison you would go on about Lyf when they weren’t there. Besides, did you hear yourself just now? You. Like. Lyf.”

And Marius thinks on that; thinks back to that smile again. He thinks on the fact there was a part of him that regretted not going back for Lyf when they broke out of the prison, but had written them off for dead and accepted that, or tried to anyway. He thinks on how relieved and happy he had felt, seeing Lyf was okay when they found them on that ship and brought them on board. He thinks he would like to see Lyf happy, instead of endlessly tired.

He would like to see them laugh because of him. He would like to see Lyf give a smile just for him. He would like to experience Lyf in every capacity that made up themself.

….So yeah. He does like Lyf. He really, really likes Lyf.

Marius runs a hand through his hair. “Shit… I- yeah, Raphaella; you’re right. I- I like them, okay? There, I said it.”

“About time you admitted it.” She cheered. “Now, the next step is to actually tell them.”

“Whoa, Raph; hang on. I seriously doubt they’d feel the same. They used to be a cop.”

“But Lyf’s not even a cop anymore, so it’s fine. Also, don’t just assume they wouldn’t feel something smilar, okay?”

“Yeah, well I’m pretty sure they hate me. You’ve seen how many times they took my violins back in the prison.”

“Because you always liked to push their buttons to see how they’d react. Look, while I do think it wasn’t your smartest idea to go get yourself attached to a mortal, I don’t think Lyf hates you. Not truly.”

Marius sighs and sits down in a chair near a workbench. “So, what should I do, Raph?”

“I mean, most of that depends on how you choose to deal with this.” She says with a shrug. “Good for you for recognizing your feelings though!”

He runs a hand down his face, silently cursing himself.

“Not helping.”

“If it’s any help at all, Ivy says they’ve been slowly warming up, but they’re probably still a bit icy right now because of the whole Bifrost thing. Lyf appears to be under a lot of stress recently because of it, not to mention we both know they worked way too much back on Midgard. Just be there I guess? You’re going to have to face up to it sooner or later. Probably sooner since they’re mortal and all.”

Marius doesn’t want to think about that. “Again, not helping.”

“Oh, right- have you taken a look at the group chat? Ivy added Lyf earlier!” Marius went to reply that no, he hadn’t gotten the chance on account of getting shot by Tim, but Raphaella already has her phone in hand and is speaking again. “Aw- Lyf asked Tim not to kill you too much.”

Yeah, he’s definitely fucked.

* * *

The next day, Brian informs them all that they will be arriving on some random planet later on in the day. Mostly so Nastya and Aurora can have their “date night”, but Marius and the rest of the Mechs will be able to find something to keep themselves entertained, he’s sure. It would probably be best to take Lyf with them, so that they’re not stuck here and subjected to “date night”.

When they reach their destination and settle into an orbit around the planet, Marius goes off to find Lyf, figuring they must be caught up in another book to take notice of their arrival.

Surprisingly, Lyf isn’t in the library. Ivy is, but she says she hadn’t seen Lyf for a while. Upon asking where they went off to, she says that Tim came by and asked to see them. Apparently, Tim had been asked by Jonny to give Lyf a weapon and shown how to handle it if they were going to take Lyf planetside. That slightly worries Marius. That’s probably a good idea, but it’s _Tim_. Also Lyf is mortal; they can still die.

He finds both Tim and Lyf in the armory (Tim’s domain), and unfortunately for Marius, he’s greeted by a shot sailing by him and landing in the wall the second he walks through the door.

“A bit jumpy, but you almost got him.” Tim comments.

Lyf meanwhile, lowers the revolver they held in their hand, looking surprised. “Mar- Von Raum. I didn’t hit you, did I? Tim snuck up on me and the revolver was still in my hand when I fired, but he moved out of the way-”

“Whoa, calm down, Lyf.” Marius replies. “I’m alright, see? No harm done. And even if that had hit me, I’d still be alright. Immortal and can heal quickly, remember?”

“Of course. I just...” They trail off and turn on Tim. “Did you sneak up behind me and startle me knowing he was there?”

“Nope. Pure coincidence.” Tim takes the gun from Lyf grasp. “You need a bit more practice, but since you’ll be hanging around with us, it’ll be fine. I’ll get this cleaned up and stocked for you to use.” He then addresses Marius. “What brings you here?”

Marius gets the feeling that there’s something unsaid behind the question, seeing as probably all the crew is aware that, yes, Marius was stupid enough to go and get a crush on a mortal; aka, Lyf. He lets that go in favor of answering the initial question.

“We’re in orbit around our destination.” He answers. “Everyone’s getting ready to go planetside.”

“Oh, right. We should probably do that. I do not want to get stuck here for “date night”, and I’m itching to blow something up.”

“You and Ashes both probably. And Jonny too.”

“Wait, is everyone leaving now?” Lyf asks.

“Just about.”

“Shit, let me grab my things. Er-” They hold out their hand for Tim. “Thanks, um, for the lessons.”

Tim tilts his head, but takes Lyf’s hand anyway. “Anytime. Come to me if your weapons need tuning.”

* * *

“I need to grab my cloak.” Lyf says as they leave the armory, Marius trailing behind them. “This place is- we’re okay here, right?”

“If you’re worried about the Bifrost getting you, I’m pretty sure you’re safe.” He quickens his steps and falls into place next to Lyf. “You’re as safe as can be with us!”

“The only mortal traveling with immortal space pirates. Sure; what can possibly go wrong with that?”

“Well, then I’ll just do the protecting for you; don’t you worry!”

Marius tries to play it off, but really, he just doesn’t want to think about the implications. He doesn’t want to think about Lyf getting hurt and/or dying. Raphaella was right; Falling for someone who could still die and stay dead was not the wisest move.

They stop by Lyf’s room momentarily so they can get a few things. Marius waits out in the corridor for them, and when they return they have their cloak on, the same one they had been wearing when Ivy found them on the other ship. It was a dark purple thing that came down to about their waist, and looked almost like it was made of… velvet? Who wears a velvet cloak?

“Alright, so… how does this work exactly?” Lyf asks.

“How does what work?”

“This whole- I assume you lot are going to go cause some trouble once we’re planetside?”

“Kinda depends on what everyone else wants to do.” He explains. “Sometimes we all just go off and do our own thing. And sometimes if a place is interesting enough, we stay there for an extended amount of time. Back when we were running around the City of Labyrinth, we got up to some good fun. We stayed there for a while but it was fun, and we got a story out of it. I think Ashes had the best time out of all of us when we were there. They literally took over some network of the dead called the Acheron and took the name Hades for a bit.”

“Ah… What were _you_ doing there in Labyrinth, von Raum?”

“Psychoanalyzing some Olympians. Jonny doesn’t believe me about that one though.”

“As you do. So… anything particularly interesting about the planet were at now?”

“Not really. Just some place to get out for a bit while Nastya and Aurora… er, you get the point by now. Just go along with it and you’ll be fine.”

“Go along with it...” Lyf repeats. “I’ll try. You forget I used to be a cop; I’m not adjusted to your particular brand of nonsense. Not that it matters much. Gods, I didn’t even enjoy my job much; it was never the best. I was a fucking traffic cop; how sad is that.”

“ ‘Used to’ being the key phrase here.” Marius points out. “And don’t put yourself down; you were a fun one!”

Lyf’s scoffed. “Really now?”

“We don’t like cops, but they’re super fun to mess with. You were different though. Plenty of your associates who tried to deal with us were quite dull, but you had such fire to you. You always had something to say, and you kept coming back to see us!”

“Because eventually I was just assigned to you three.”

“Well, at least I liked it when you came by; always brightened my day!” Hm, wait… “I mean, we all liked it when you were around. Made our days waiting for the train a little less boring.”

“Don’t think I didn’t forget the times you three _did_ break out of your cell, only to come _back_. You never even went far.”

“Ivy and Raph wanted to mess with the cops sometimes. I was just along for the ride.”

Lyf makes a humming noise, mostly in acknowledgment, but also coming across as “of course you did”. God, Marius likes everything about Lyf, and after the conversations he had with Raphaella and Tim, he’s well aware of how Lyf makes him feel. However, he doesn’t… he doesn’t want to push this because he’s still aware Lyf’s not in a good place, what with all the Bifrost stuff. He isn’t even sure if Lyf would feel the same.

“If we’re going planetside, I guess there are a few things I can pick up.” Lyf says, changing subject. “Though none of my currency, if I had any, would work here most likely...”

“Don’t you worry; we’ve got you covered.” He winks at Lyf for good measure and they return it by narrowing their eyes at him.

“I have an idea of what you mean, so I guess I’ll try to, as you put it, be along for the ride.”

“That’s the spirit!”

* * *

Lyf is kind of nervous when they’re all taking a small landing craft down to the planet’s surface. It’s not a large planet by any means, but they do land near a decently populated area. It’s about late afternoon, according to this planet’s time, and Lyf briefly realizes that they’re going to have to get accustomed to actual night and day cycles again for however long they’re here. Marius did say the crew sometimes stays in one place for years and years on end, though given they’re all trying to avoid “date night”, Lyf doubts they’ll be staying long; overnight at least.

The nerves come in part from that Lyf’s never been to anywhere outside their own star system before, but also because they’re traveling with the damned Mechanisms. They were aware of the type of trouble Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella had gotten up to in Yggdrasil and that was only the three of them. Now the crew was all together, and Lyf could only imagine what would result from this venture. Nothing good, they assumed. They’re pretty sure something would at least get blown up and/or burned down.

They stay close to Marius during the landing. It’s mostly because they are not too familiar with the other Mechanisms yet, and of the three they feel okay to be around, not to mention having known for years, they feel oddly more comfortable with Marius. For all his annoyance, and for all the stupid violin playing, Lyf has never felt like the man would ever hurt them. When they had known Marius as just a prisoner, they just seemed more bored than anything, as did Ivy and Raphaella. They’d feel more comfortable sticking around any of those three right now, but Marius especially.

And there’s also what Marius said to them earlier that’s stuck in their mind; about protecting Lyf and not to worry about a thing.

It does funny things to their heart.

When they land, things seem relatively calm, until they step out of the landing craft and Tim gives Lyf their revolver with a wink.

‘ _Oh no, here we go.’_ Lyf thinks to themself.

“Alright, you bastards.” Jonny exclaims, loading up his own weapon. “Let’s get this party started. We’re running the usual; go have some fun, find someplace to crash later.”

“Er… what about me?” Lyf speaks up.

Jonny shrugs. “Don’t know. Go shoot something? Blow off some steam?”

“How helpful.”

“How about you come with me and Raphaella?” Ivy suggests. “I want to see if there’s anything I can add to the library.”

Given that Ivy and Raphaella are less volatile than some of the others, Lyf doesn’t think that’s a bad idea. “Alright.”

They turn to von Raum to ask what he intends to do while they’re all planetside, but then the shooting starts and the next thing Lyf knows is that they’re getting dragged off to somewhere by Ivy and Raphaella.

“Ah- von Raum?!” They call out in confusion.

Looking back, they just see Marius give a shrug. Somewhere they hear Jonny laughing.

* * *

Honestly, Marius is a little worried about Lyf when Ivy and Raphaella drag them away, but he reasons they’ll be okay with those two. Probably…

Everyone else has already split off at this point to go do whatever, and Marius finds himself left with Brian.

He and Brian share a glance.

“Well… What do you wanna do?” He asked Brian, wondering what mode he was on.

Brian merely shrugged. “We could go get supplies for the ship.”

“You’re on Boring Brian mode, aren’t you?”

“We still need supplies. We only got a little bit from the ship you found Lyfrassir on.”

“Tim blew it up.” Marius reminded him.

“I maintain my previous statement. And maybe you can find yourself a new violin, or something nice for your Lyfrassir.”

“Don’t word it like that. We’re not- how many of the crew know about this?”

“Pretty much everyone, and we ordered TS to be quiet about it. You made it too obvious after you came back from Midgard.”

“I mean, I wasn’t happy we left Lyf behind, but I wasn’t wallowing _that much_.”

“Yes, you were wallowing. A lot. Right now, they’re all keeping quiet for the most part to see what happens… and because there’s kind of a betting pool on you two right now.”

Marius looks at him incredulously. “You can’t be serious.”

Brian smiles and shrugs again. Figures the rest of the Mechs would be putting bets on this.

“I’ll figure out a way to get back at you all later.” Marius says, adjusting his hat. “Let just get the damn supplies and then go do something that’s actually fun.”

He ends up wandering with Brian into the city they had landed just outside of, looking for supplies to take back to the _Aurora_ (or for Marius just looking for something to keep him from getting bored). He wonders what the others are up to right now, though he can probably take a good guess as to what Jonny, Tim, and Ashes were doing. Those three were predictable. Toy Solider was probably off somewhere doing… whatever it was TS did. Something with teeth maybe? Ivy and Raphaella were likely finding some more books and anything scientific that caught Raphaella’s attention.

His mind wanders to Lyf, who got dragged off by Ivy and Raphaella. Again, Marius reminds himself that they’re probably okay with those two. Everything’s fine.

That doesn’t stop him from messaging Ivy in the group chat though.

> **I_am_so_a_doctor** **:** I don’t know where you guys ran off to but go easy on poor Lyf
> 
> **Archive Ivy** **:** We’re not going to break them, don’t worry
> 
> **AlywaysTimeForScience** **:** We got them a phone and I think they’re just… window shopping now? Is that how they worded it?
> 
> **Humble_Captian** **:** Boring! Let them commit a crime! Also I found a pub we can all hide out in tonight.
> 
> ~ _Humble_Captian has changed their name to Humble_First_Mate~_
> 
> **Humble_First_Mate:** Ivy! >:/
> 
> **L** **yf** **:** I’m fine, von Raum. Seriously.

Seeing that last message (he’d forgotten that Ivy added Lyf yesterday) made Marius relax a little bit.

> **Gunfire &Explosions_Tim: **Aw, look at that; he’s worried about you, Lyf~

Marius scowls at his phone and puts in back in his pocket. Ironically enough, Tim’s not wrong. Lyf was still mortal and Marius was concerned about them getting into some sort of trouble.

At some point, he splits up from Brian and comes across a store that sells musical instruments, to which of course he’s going to check out because- hey, more violins. He had enough of them already as it was, not to mention a mandolin, but there was a really nice looking one in the window display.

He remembers wondering if Lyf had played an instrument once (that fleeting moment, Marius had their hand in his), and now kinda regrets not asking. He didn’t even know what kind of instrument Lyf would go for. He almost texts them to ask, but decides against it, leaving him to just guess work. That’s not going to help any. If they did play an instrument though, that would be interesting; maybe he could convince Lyf to join the band! Then again, considering what the next story was supposed to be, that might be a bad idea.

For now, Marius will settle on getting himself a new violin. He’ll ask Lyf about the instrument thing another time.

So he obtains the violin… by stealing it of course.

One broken window and a few gunshots later, with the new violin in hand, Marius goes back to find Brian. He expects to find the pilot with a crate of supplies and to be asked to help take them to the landing craft. Instead he finds Brian arguing with someone and- ah, it seems his switch got flipped.

Marius runs up to Brian to help with whatever fight was about to unfold.

* * *

“Mind telling me where we’re going?”

“Somewhere.” Raphaella replied cheerfully. This didn’t help Lyf whatsoever.

They’re currently with Ivy and Raphaella in some random part of whatever city this was. Lyf doesn’t know what everyone else is up to, and part of them doesn’t really want to try and guess what. The only conclusion they can come to is that it’s nothing good.

So, Lyf resigns themself to following these two around for the time being. Hopefully, whatever their intentions are, it doesn’t end too badly for them all (Lyf especially).

“How have you been doing?” Raphaella asks them after Ivy runs into a bookshop. “Settling in alright?”

“As much as I can.” Lyf replies. “Though I have been spending much of my time in the library going through the things Ivy gathered from Yggdrasil. It’s not the same, but… it’s something.”

“Good. Has Marius tried to play anything on the violin for you again?”

“What? Gods, don’t get me started on that. But, no, surprisingly he hasn’t as much as I expected.”

“Huh, I thought he would have by now. He’s happy to see you again though, which is good, because now he’ll stop looking miserable all the time.”

While Lyf has been spared from violins so far, save for the first morning aboard the _Aurora_ , Raphaella does bring up a familiar line of thought. Marius had apparently missed them. It was weird to them at first, given the whole you’re-the-prisoner-i’m-the-cop thing they previously had back on Midgard. Lyf wouldn’t think a former prisoner would miss them at all, but given what they’ve heard and how Marius has been acting around them lately… maybe they were wrong?

Lyf decided to get a second opinion. Turning to Raphaella, they ask, “Von Raum really missed me? He was miserable when he got back to your ship?”

“Oh yes. He’s very fond of you-”

“Ah, y-yes- Ivy mentioned that.”

“Me and Ivy did think it was unfortunate you would be left to die, back when we assumed you would have died. Ivy’s calculations did say there was a chance you would make an attempt to leave Midgard and the Yggdrasil system once you discovered the truth, but given the conditions there was a margin for doubt. Marius took it the hardest though. It wasn’t even until we were back on Aurora that he admitted that he regretted not going back for you. He said he was fine, but we all noticed him lurking about the ship in not so high spirits.”

“I… I see...”

Now that Lyf thinks about it, considers it, Marius has seemed really happy to see them again. They’ve sort of fallen back into their old banter that they shared for the better part of Lyf’s time being part of the transport police. It’s familiar in the whirlwind of every part of Lyf’s life being completely destroyed by the Bifrost. The familiarity felt good in some way, but they still didn’t expect to hear that Marius had missed them; now confirmed by both Ivy and Raphaella.

Ivy returns from the shop with a couple new books in a bag and a smile on her face. Then they’re all off again and Lyf follows alongside them. They do obtain a new phone, courtesy of Raphaella and Ivy, and eventually Lyf says they’re going to do a bit of window shopping. The two other Mechanisms find that funny for some reason.

At one point Ivy also says they were mentioned in the group chat because Marius is apparently worried about them. Lyf, with the new phone, checks it to see a few messages. With a sigh, Lyf puts in a message just saying that they’re fine and continues on.

Passing by one shop, Lyf sees an outfit in the window display and takes a moment to observe it. A nice white top with way too many ruffles down the front, with a sparking opal at the collar. It’s complimented by a long dull red skirt that appears to be made of a thicker material. It’s nice looking altogether and, honestly, Lyf likes it a lot.

“You want that?” Ivy asks, appearing next to them.

‘ _Well, I do need new clothes if I’m going to be traveling with the Mechanisms.’_ Lyf silently admits to themself.

“It would be nice. I don’t think I have anything for proper-”

“Don’t you worry about that. We’ll take care of it.” Raphaella assures them.

Lyf remembers what Marius told them back on the ship, and knows that any of them would be completely serious about that implication. They can see now that both Ivy and Raphaella are grinning at them and before they can realize what’s about to happen, one of them busts down the door of the shop.

One of them fires off a pistol and- oh Gods, they’re really going along with this aren’t they?

While those two are off causing chaos and being distracting, Lyf takes the clothing from the window display. To think, this is what they’re life has become. But to be fair, everything about Lyf’s life had technically ended with the destruction of Yggdrasil. They were still Lyfrassir Edda, but at the same time they were someone new. They were Lyfrassir Edda; sole survivor and record keeper of Yggdrasil’s downfall. Also traveling companion to a group of space pirates. Also possibly, very possibly, marked by the Bifrost. At this point, they might as well go along with it.

While they’re here, Lyf looks around for some more clothes. They spot a lovely long earthy tone coat and pause to look it over. Taking off their cloak, they try this new thing on, and- oh yes, very nice indeed. They think they'll keep this one too.

They set the clothes under a rack and go to find Ivy and Raphaella, make sure they haven’t gotten themselves in too much trouble. They did both start a robbery for them, after all. They’re coming out of one aisle-

And they hear a shot, followed by a piercing, stinging pain in their upper arm. They see rainbow for a half second.

Lyf stumbles back a half step and clutches at the spot where they feel pain, letting out a cry at the same time. Fuck… it hurts a lot… They almost double over from it because the pain is just all up and down their arm and _it hurts_. What even happened? Lyf tries to breathe through it and dares a look at their arm, pulling their hand back slightly and seeing- oh Gods there’s blood on their shirt. Were they shot?

Between processing what just happened and the spots of rainbow fading in and out of their sight, they feel as though they need to sit down. Just sit for a moment and keep their hand tight on the wound to stop the bleeding. But as they do so, they can’t help but close their eyes against the pain. They can hear their own rushed heart beat in their ears, and they’re in pain and they want it to stop, and-

There’s this weird buzzing sensation throughout them; in their veins. Is it just the pain doing this, or-

“Lyf!”

Lyf opens their eyes and manages to look up to see Ivy kneeling in front of them, Raphaella standing close by. Ivy looks… concerned. The dancing prisms of color are gone at least.

“Did my bullet get you?” She asks. “I thought you were someone else trying to interrupt our fun.”

“You- Ugh… My- my arm.” They manage.

“Raphaella, take a look? If it’s bad and Edda dies, von Raum will kill us, and not in the fun way.”

Now Raphaella is next to them, hands hovering near their arm. “Let me see?”

Lyf shakily removes their hand and Raphaella cuts away the fabric with a pocket knife so she can look at the injury. The sweater was an old worn thing anyway. No big loss. She’s surprisingly careful when examining their arm.

She smiles after a moment. “Yeah, looks like you nicked them, Ivy, but it doesn’t look too bad. I don’t see anything lodged in the flesh- if anything it just grazed you, Lyf. Your arm will probably be sore for a bit.”

Odd; it felt like it had cut deeper than that…

“That’s good, right?”

“You’ll be fine. Let’s just put something on that to slow down the bleeding, okay?”

Ivy salvages some cloth from a shirt and gets it wrapped around the wound as a makeshift bandage. Ivy apologizes for accidentally shooting Lyf, but they’re not too mad at her for it. They were surprised it hadn’t happened sooner. Raphaella does take a selfie of them all and sends it to the groupchat (“Lyf’s first gunfight!” she had sent), which just makes Lyf sigh with exasperation.

The store is deserted by this point, so Ivy and Rapahella help Lyf gather up some clothes they want (as well as their cloak they left with said clothes) and make a break for it before anybody else can show up.

The weirdest part, as they make their escape, is that after a while- yes. their arm is sore like Raphaella predicted, but the wound itself doesn’t really hurt that much anymore. Was it supposed to stop hurting that quickly…?

* * *

It turns out that Jonny wasn’t lying about finding a pub to “hide out at”. He’s not there when Lyf arrives with Ivy and Raphaella, but they do find they’re not the only ones. Brian and Tim are here, and the place is a mess. Lyf can take a guess as to what happened. Marius is also here… and sleeping on the floor near a tipped over table. Also is that blood on his shirt?

“Is, um- Is von Raum okay?” Lyf asks, concern creeping into them as they take off their cloak and set it over a chair.

“He and Brian got into a fight while picking up supplies. He’ll be fine.” Tim assures them. “We’re all immortal, remember?”

“Right… yes.” That’s right. Lyf kept forgetting. They relax a little. “What happened to him?”

“Got shot.” Brian replies.

“Ah.”

“Meanwhile, I heard you got yourself in a bit of a scuffle.” Tim mentions, gesturing at the cloth still wrapped around their arm.

“It’s nothing major. Just an accidental shot that grazed me.”

It’s at this point, Lyf turns their gaze to Marius, still asleep on the floor. They decide to go over to kneel in front of him. He appeared to be unconscious still, probably sleeping off whatever injury he had sustained. From what Lyf’s seen, the Mechanisms recover quickly from injury and death, so they’ll just wait for him to wake up. Lyf listens to the chatter of the others while they wait.

“Jonny and Ashes aren’t back?”

“Knowing those two, not yet. Ashes is probably finding more stuff to burn and I think Jonny mentioned something about getting some Vodka to take back to Nastya, and probably shooting a few people while he’s at it. Supplies are already dropped off at the landing craft, in case you’re wondering.”

“You got some more books there, Ivy?”

“Of course. Always looking for more things for the collection.”

“Oh, wait, what about TS?”

“Not certain. It’ll show up at some point though.”

Lyf listened to all this in silence, briefly thinking they should have looked for some mead. They doubt this place has any. Soon though, they see Marius stir from where he lay on the floor. Lyf watches his eyes open, look around in a daze, before settling on Lyf. Marius smiles.

“Fancy seeing you here.” He says. Lyf quietly pokes him in the forehead. “Hey. What was that for?”

“You are alive then.” Lyf says. “Have a nice nap?”

“Of course I’m alive. Imm-”

“Immortal. Yes, yes, I know. Just sleeping?”

“Yeah. Me and Brian-” And then they see his eyes focus on something and- Oh, now he’s getting himself up into a sitting position and- “Lyf, what happened? Are you alright?”

‘ _Ah, the wound.’_ They realize. Marius must have noticed the cloth around their arm.

“This-” They poke at the makeshift bandage experimentally. Still sore, but still not as much pain from the injured area itself. “It’s nothing. Bullet accidentally got me while we were… were robbing a clothing store...”

All at once the concern melts of his face and is replaced with laughter. “You were- Lyfrassir Edda; robbing a clothing store! I’d thought I’d never see the day!”

“Ivy and Raphaella started it. I was just… there. I need some new clothes anyway. I’m surprised you didn’t notice before; Raphaella posted a picture in the group chat.”

Marius gets out his own phone and Lyf can tell the exact moment when he finds it. “Dammit, I missed it. But we’ll make you one of us yet.”

Lyf scoffs, but they can’t stop the smile that comes over them. Everything about this is so strange and such shift from how their life previously was, and yet Lyf finds this turn of events wanting to make them laugh. It’s the ridiculousness of it all.

They sit back on the floor. “Got no place better to be, right?”

“Yeah...” Marius looks down at his shirt and vest, frowning at the blood there. “Damn, I liked this vest.”

“I’m sure you can get a new one.”

“I did get a new violin while I was helping Brian pick up supplies!”

Lyf’s eyes widen and they bury their head in their hands. “Of course you did.”

With their sweater now thoroughly ruined from being cut open earlier, Lyf decides that they want into some of their new clothes now, just as a way of feeling more comfortable. Marius asks to patch up the wound on their arm properly before they do so, and Lyf allows it, reasoning it would be better than having a random strip of cloth attached to their arm.

Lyf watches Marius apply fresh bandaging over the injury, using some gauze stored away in a dusty first aid kit that was stored somewhere in the pub. It actually doesn’t look too bad now that Lyf gets a good look at it. They could have sworn- it felt worse initially, but maybe that was their mind trying to process the sensations of pain and everything else firing off at once. It still doesn’t hurt, even as Marius gently cleans the blood away with what’s left of the original cloth. Their arm still feels like it’s covered in bruises, but otherwise they feel fine.

Once that’s done, Lyf finds a store room to get changed into their new clothes. Lyf decides upon the outfit he’d seen in the window display and smooths down the fabric once they’ve got them on. It feels nice, much to Lyf’s pleasure. They redo their hair in a quick ponytail, not quite ready to put braids back in it just yet. Tying back their hair with a ribbon they had picked up in the city (along with some clasps for when they’re ready to do braids again among other things), Lyf feels presentable enough to regroup with the others.

“Oh, so pretty, Lyf!” Raphaella comments as they come back into the main area.

“Suits you well.” Ivy joins in.

Lyf expects to hear Marius chime in with something, but when they look over at him, Marius has this odd expression, almost transfixed on- wait, on Lyf? What they’re wearing? Oh Gods.

Lyf turns their gaze to the floor, cheeks flushing with embarrassment. “I think I’m going to head back into the city and see if there’s any place that sells mead. I need a break from your schemes too.”

“Aw, but Lyf, you got to take part in your first robbery!” Raphaella pouts.

“Need a break. And I want to get some mead to take back to the ship for our travels.”

“Suit yourself.”

Raphaella hands over a small pouch of currency tokens that she says should be enough for what they need. Lyf grabs their cloak and is about ready to head out when Marius taps them on the shoulder to get their attention.

“Mind if I join you?” He asks. “Haven’t gotten much of a chance to take in the sights on account of getting shot.”

Part of Lyf wants to say they’ll be fine on their own, but there’s another part that doesn’t have the heart to stop him.

“Alright.” Lyf allows. “No violins though.”

“No promises.”

Lyf just sighs, and catches sight of Tim giving them a thumbs up for some reason.

* * *

They don’t say much to each other, though Lyf silently remarks that Marius kinda looks like a lost puppy following them around. Lyf doesn’t mind, actually, though most of their focus is on navigating the streets right now. There was still the matter of the fact Lyf had never been here before so they didn’t know where they were going. Marius has been oddly quiet though; they have never known him to be of the quiet type.

Pausing at a crossroads, Lyf checks their phone for which direction to go in. When they tuck it back into their pocket (the skirt actually had pockets), they catch Marius staring at them again for some reason. He’s still got a little blood on his shirt, but he’s also wearing a red vest that hides most of it.

“Yes?” Lyf sighs and says with a hint of irritation. Force of habit.

“Nothing!” Marius exclaims. “Nothing, it’s just- you look nice, Lyf.”

Their shoulders slump. That’s why he looked at them that way back in the pub, as they thought. “I… do? Er, thanks.”

Marius just nods at them. “Better than that stupid work uniform you wore back on Midgard. That’s all I would ever see you in.”

“That’s why it’s called a uniform, von Raum.”

“It was still pretty bland. This is a much better look for you!”

“Hm.” Lyf looks down at themself. “I must admit that it does feel nice, and far better than that stuffy uniform I used to wear.”

They’re actually grateful of Marius’s compliment; he seems truthful in what he says. It makes a pleasant warmth bloom in their chest. It means more than Lyf can think to voice right now, and more than Marius may know.

“You know, speaking of my old job, can I ask you something?”

“Yeah. What’s up?”

Lyf’s been thinking about this, if things would have been any different if Marius had come back and taken them away from Midgard when he broke out of prison with Ivy and Raphaella for the last time. Looking back, things wouldn’t have been much different. If anything, given the timing of it all, Lyf probably would have taken the knowledge that their world was to be devoured in a rainbow of madness even worse. Yet, Lyf kind of wishes that had been the scenario that played out. Maybe the Bifrost wouldn’t have seeped into them then. Or maybe it still would have, because of the Black Box.

And there’s the tiniest thought, something about a space pirate saving them from a cosmic horror, that they find themselves daydreaming of if they stay along the same line of thought for too long. They even dreamed once of it, before Lyf learned the truth inside the Black Box. They’d chided themself for having such a stupid dream before, but… things were different.

“Was it true?” Lyf asks, stepping closer to Marius. “When I said the Ratatosk had reappeared, and you three took off after I left- You told me you considered coming back… for me. You really wanted to steal me away when you escaped the prison?”

Marius looks them in the eyes, bringing his hands together. “I mean… yeah. Thought about it. Strongly considered it.”

They take a breath. “How… how would you have done it?”

“Probably come find you and take you away like the dashing pirate doctor I am. Sweep you off your feet somehow and save you from the terrors of the Bifrost.”

Lyf laughs, and this time their smile stays, to their own surprise. They look at Marius sheepishly. “Show me...?”

“Huh?”

“Show me how you would have saved me, you fool.”

Marius seems to take a moment to process this request, but then gets a mischievous look on his face. “Well, then, Inspector Lyf!” They almost correct Marius, remind them that it’s ‘former inspector’ now, but Lyf lets it slide. “So, I’ve broken out of prison, again, but this time, I’ve come back, though I really should be on my way.”

Lyf crosses their arms, playing along. “For what purpose?”

“We don’t have much time, dear Inspector. And I’d rather not see you dead!” He reaches out and places a hand on Lyf’s uninjured arm. “The Bifrost.”

“What about the Bifrost?”

“You’ve seen into the Black Box, haven’t you? You know what’s coming. But fear not; I’m here to save you!”

“Me?”

“Yes, you! Now, there’s no time to loose-”

Without warning, Lyf finds that there’s suddenly hands at their waist, and they’re being pulled close, picked up, and twirled around by Marius. Lyf lets out a startled yelp that comes out as more of a squeak, but they find themselves breaking out into laughter. They shouldn’t be enjoying this so much. It’s all too sudden though, making their head spin.

“Put me down! I’m getting dizzy!” They plead, but still laughing.

Marius quickly puts them back on the ground, looking a tad bit guilty. “Sorry, I got a little too into it. You okay?”

Lyf reaches out for Marius to steady themselves. They can’t remember when they last laughed like that. “I’m okay. It was- I wasn’t expecting that.”

“I should have asked before picking you up like that.”

“Don’t worry about it.” They push some loose strands of hair from their face. “...Part of me wishes you had come back.”

“Oh?” Marius says, sounding a bit surprised that Lyf would actually say that.

“I don’t think anything would be much different, the outcome would still be the same, but I maintain my statement. I just didn’t think you cared enough to bother; it never even crossed my mind. I mean, I was a cop; you were the prisoner. What reason would you have had?”

Now, to their surprise, Marius comes up and takes their hand.

“I would have.” Marius says, his voice strangely soft. “I figured you were too distracted by the Black Box and that it just didn’t matter, especially given you’re mortal. Blame our weird logic that comes with being unable to die. But, Lyf, I... I realized I fucking missed you. I regretted not coming back the moment I got back to the _Aurora_. I thought you’d be dead by then though, so it just seemed like I’d have to live with that. If I had figured out that’s what I wanted, I would have tried to come back. Despite what you may think, I’m really, really happy you’re alive.”

“For… for what? To annoy me with a violin?”

“Just in general. Guess you could say you grew on me, and honestly, after spending all those years around you, it wasn’t much the same.”

“Oh. I see… Well, I’m sort of glad I’m here now.”

They share a gaze into each other’s eyes, and then Marius seems to realize he’s still holding onto Lyf’s hand. He quickly lets go, but he does not stop looking at Lyf. Lyf flexes their hand, feeling the ghost of Marius’s hand in theirs.

“Lets find you some mead, yeah?” He asks.

Lyf wants nothing more. “Yes.”

And as they walk through the city together, Lyf stays a bit closer to Marius. He’s not all that bad, really.

* * *

After finding a shop with some mead, which results in _another_ robbery (thankfully not one that ends with Lyf getting accidentally shot again), Marius and Lyf return to the pub. Jonny, Ashes, and Toy Solider have returned as well, telling the group about what sort of things they each got up to.

It’s not too soon after that Brian finds a kitchen and starts to cook up something with what’s available. Ashes starts up a round of cards, to which a few partake. Eventually, someone finds whiskey and that starts getting passed around, except to Lyf, who’s opened a bottle of mead. Jonny calls them boring again, and Lyf tosses a crumpled up napkin at him. Tim laughs at that.

And it’s not too long after that Ashes finds some candles and lights them, the singing starts, and Marius gets out his new violin. No one is surprised by this.

Of course Lyf makes a grab for the violin, but by this time they’ve had a fair amount of mead and all they can manage is a weak bat at his arms. Marius chuckles and guides Lyf to take a seat at one of the tables that’s not tipped over. He tells them to sit back and enjoy the music as him and two of the others jump into a round of singing Blood and Whiskey.

With each of of his verses that comes around (since Marius played Arthur when they ran the story of that doomed station), he played it up just a bit more and looked to Lyf to see their reaction. They were still sitting where Marius had left them, but they looked relaxed, almost like they were enjoying themself. It only served to give Marius more encouragement to put more heart into the song he was singing. He could pretend in these moments that he was singing just for Lyf.

Him and the others all did a couple more songs, but after finishing another, Marius couldn’t help but notice Lyf was absent from the group. He’d been so wrapped up in the songs he hadn’t noticed Lyf slip away.

“Uh, has anyone seen Lyf?” Marius asks the others.

“Nope. Seems They’ve Wandered Away!” Toy Solider chimes, spinning in a circle.

“Worried your datemate’s run off somewhere?” Tim says, though his voice has a teasing tone to it.

“Watch it.” Marius warns.

“I’m sure they haven’t gone far.” Ashes tries to reassure him. “I think I saw them head out near the end of that last song.”

“Well then, I’ll be back in a bit.”

“Gonna go check on Lyf?”

“Gonna go check on Lyf.”

The good news is that he doesn’t have to go far. There’s a sculpture garden across the street, which is the first place Marius checks. It’s there that he finds Lyf sitting on a bench, seemingly staring at a weird looking sculpture across the way.

“There you are.” Marius says, sitting down next to Lyf on the bench. “Didn’t see you after that last song. Is it my singing? My singing isn’t that bad!”

They don’t say anything at first, but slowly they unfreeze from their stupor and speak. “...I don’t know if this was the best idea. I made myself sick on whiskey on the flight away from Yggdrasil. But I haven’t had mead in so long. Reminds me of home.”

“Oh. Needed some fresh air then? Do you, uh, feel okay?”

“I’ll probably have a hangover in the morning.” Lyf pauses, and a dry humorless laugh comes from their lips. “...How have things ended up this way?”

“What do you mean?”

“Everything. Yggdrasil is gone, von Raum.”

“Okay, maybe, but you’re alive, aren’t you?” Marius counters. “You’re alive, and you’re in the company of the greatest band of space pirates you’ll ever meet! Not to mention me; the most handsome and charming of them all.”

He expects Lyf to laugh at him, call him stupid, but Lyf does none of that. Maybe they’re not as alright as they thought.

“Hey, Lyf, I know you probably don’t want to hear it from me, but if there’s anything you need at all-”

“This is fine.” Lyf interrupts. “Von Raum- Marius. It’s nothing you or the rest of the Mechanisms did. It’s not the singing- the songs were wonderful, actually, and weren’t that one you kept trying to play for me in the prison. In fact, despite your group’s questionable activities, you’ve all been more welcoming than I expected. A few of you scare me more than others, but you all have made me feel better than I have in the days I spent adrift after leaving Midgard.”

Marius feels a surge of joy that perhaps Lyf is starting to call him by his first name now! Okay, maybe it’s because of the mead Lyf has had, but still. “We’re all insufferable, but you’ll get used to it!”

Lyf nods and continues. “It’s just my own anxieties, after everything that’s happened; what I’ve seen. The thing with my eyes doesn’t help at all. And before you ask, no, you can’t psychoanalyze me.”

He wants to pretend to be insulted, but honestly, with Lyf like this he doesn’t have the heart to try. He’s just about to see if he can get Lyf onto their feet and back to the pub-

But then there’s something resting against his shoulder, and he realizes it’s Lyf. The other is just barely pressed up against his side, and their head is now on his shoulder. Marius can see that their eyes are slipping closed.

“Lyf? You sure you’re feeling alright?” Marius asks, carefully slipping an arm around them.

“I’m just… very, very… tired.” Their speech is slowing. “I don’t sleep well anymore...”

That makes worry spark in him, but it looks like Lyf’s out and asleep before he can think to voice it. Maybe that’s for the best, since they’ve seen to be in various states of tired since coming aboard the _Aurora_. He’s aware that Lyf’s likely still trying to compartmentalize the literal destruction of the star system and being the only survivor of such a calamity. That’ll fuck you right up.

Carefully, he takes Lyf and gathers them into his arms. They deserve to sleep somewhere that’s not a park bench, although it’s not like the pub has any better options but the floor. They can’t get back to the _Aurora_ till morning either. He’ll just have to make Lyf as comfortable as possible.

When Marius is back inside the pub, he finds that Raphaella and Ivy are off in their own corner; Ivy reading one of her new books while Raphaella lays with her head in Ivy’s lap. Jonny and Ashes are playing cards at one of the tables again. Tim’s cleaning one of his guns with a rag. He doesn’t see Brian and Toy Solider though.

“Where’s Brian and TS?” Marius asks Tim, keeping his voice low as to not wake Lyf.

“Brian’s fetching the sleeping bags from the landing craft.” Tim answers. “Not sure about TS. Oh- what happened to our new crew member over here?”

“Probably had a bit too much to drink or mead makes them really tired for some reason.” He assumes, though he does suspect other reasons now. “They’re right out of it, so be quiet.”

“Hey, I’m just here making sure my guns are in working order.”

Marius ends up settling down with Lyf near the fireplace, letting them rest their head on his lap until Brian returns with the sleeping bags. They remain sound asleep for the most part and everyone else blessedly leaves them be. Lyf is rather cute while they sleep, which doesn't help the fact that Marius totally has a crush on them. Lyf deserves to rest though, after everything they’ve been through. They need time to recover.

By the time Brian gets back, Jonny and Ashes have gone out again and now Tim’s the one playing cards with Brian. Ivy and Raphaella are still doing their own thing, and Marius is still with Lyf by the fireplace. As much as he would like to stay like this with Lyf, even if some of the other Mechs have quietly taken photos of them for amusement and or future backmail, he doesn’t know how well they would react to waking up like this. Probably not well once the alcohol wore off.

He’s about to ask Brian for one of the sleeping bags when Lyf starts to become restless. Marius looks down at them to see their face take on a more pained expression. Their brows furrow and a whimper slips free.

‘ _Nightmare?’_ Marius thinks to himself. Has to be; it makes sense given Lyf literally told him they don’t sleep well anymore. With the given information, he can take a wild guess as to why. He doesn’t want to speculate on what Lyf must be seeing in their dreams.

“Lyf? Hey, uh… Lyf?” Marius tries. Dammit, he’s not good at this, especially when Lyf turns and practically curls into him, hand latching onto his vest. “Come on now; it’s just a dream. Whatever you’re seeing- it can’t hurt you.”

He puts a hand on Lyf’s shoulder and gives a light squeeze, trying somehow to assure Lyf that they’re safe. This seems to register to Lyf and they calm down, relaxing once again. Unfortunately a few moments later their eyes flutter open, making Marius freeze. They lazily look up at him.

“...Marius?” Their voice croaks. Lyf still seems pretty out of it.

“Uh… you’re, uh- you’re dreaming!” Marius tries to convince them. “Yeah. You’re dreaming, so just go back to sleep.”

“But-”

“The Bifrost can’t find you here. You’re okay. Sleep.”

Lyf mutters something he can’t quite make out, but Lyf closes their eyes once again. Marius keeps a hand on Lyf’s shoulder and starts to move his thumb in slow circles, hoping to help Lyf relax. Despite knowing the others will never let this go since they’re all in the same room, Marius begins to sing to them. Slowly, softly, carefully. He picks Sirens for this endeavor, though he’s never sung it himself. It's always been done by others while he plays a violin, but for Lyf, to maybe help them...

> _“Come my way and stay my honey.  
>  Lay your body down next to me.”_

He gets through the first chorus and checks on Lyf, finding them fast asleep once again. Guess it worked. He smiles down at them-

“How sweet.” Comes a quiet comment from Raphaella.

Marius looks up to see the other Mechs regarding him with delighted and entertained smiles. Tim’s got his phone out and has probably filmed the whole thing. Marius quietly gives him the finger; he knows he’ll never hear the end of this.

Totally worth it though, just for Lyf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyf's cloak is actually modeled after the very same cloak I have! And yes, it is a dark purple velvet!
> 
> All the eldritch weirdness will be backing off for a bit, except for- Gee, Lyf, I wonder why you feel better so quickly after you got accidentally shot? Maybe you've got some advanced regeneration now because of certain exposure to certain spooky cosmic forces. (spoiler: they totally do. I just worded it vaguely)
> 
> The last section where Marius finds Lyf after they wander away from the group is inspired by/set to the song Shelter From The Rain, by The Gentleman Losers


	4. Caught In Your Orbit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew returns to the Aurora, and time moves forward; including violins, late night bonding, old stories, yearning, and possibly terrible decisions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another long chapter. Half as a follow up to the last chapter, and half as a couple more random moments between Lyf and Marius. Also... a little something else at the end.
> 
> also, pigeonanarchy- I like your suggestion on "archivy". I'm gonna roll with it XD

Lyf’s head is killing them when they wake up, and really, they shouldn’t be surprised by this. That’s what they get for indulging because the stupid mead made them nostalgic for a now non-existent home. Stupid hangover headaches. Nothing Lyf hasn’t dealt with before though, it was just annoying, and other than that, he feel relatively okay. It was just their head… and a low rolling sound of static.

They let out a loud groan and roll over onto their side, pressing their head into whatever is under they've rested it on. The sound they’ve heard in their nightmares fades after a moment, and- why are they on the floor? Well, not completely. They seem to be laying in a sleeping bag. And why is there a coat pillowed under their head?

“Looks like our sleeping beauty’s awake.” Someone calls.

Lyf manages to sit up so they can attempt to glare daggers at whoever just said that. They find Tim standing by the bar and putting on his coat.

“It’s called a hangover.” Lyf manages. “Why am I on the floor?”

“You’ve been out of it since last night, mate. It’s morning now and Nastya says we’re free to come back aboard.”

Right. That makes sense. Lyf’s memories get fuzzy around the time some of the Mechanisms started singing something about blood and whiskey. They must have fallen asleep at some point.

They look around, slightly dazed. The only other person they see is Ashes. “Where’s everyone else?”

“I think they went out to get breakfast before heading back to the landing craft.”

“And you two are still here because…?”

“To make sure you were up first.” Ashes answers. “You wanna help us track down the others?”

“Not really.” Lyf admits, putting a hand to their head. “I’d rather just got back to the landing craft, if it’s all the same to you.”

“Did you sleep well at least?”

The question is one that makes Lyf pause. They didn’t have any nightmares, thank the Gods, but they did have a strange dream. It’s only half remembered, but Lyf remembers it bordering on becoming a nightmare, but something pulled them back and saved them from it. The rainbows had dispelled and it was all quiet. Well, quiet except for- Lyf could have sworn they heard someone singing to them, and there was a fireplace crackling from somewhere nearby. The singing wasn’t like any of the things calling to them in the nightmares related to the Bifrost, but a gentle soft tune that Lyf remembers so clearly.

“Uh, yeah. My sleep was fine, I think.” They answer. “...There was a coat under- who’s coat was left for me as an approximation of a pillow?”

“That’d be Marius’s.” Tim answers casually.

Oh…

Now that they examine the coat, it does indeed look exactly like the one they would usually see Marius wearing. Was that done on purpose? It must have been. That was… strangely sweet. In any case, they’ll have to make sure the coat is properly returned to him.

Lyf rubs at their eyes, somehow hoping that would help ease the headache pounding through their skull. It doesn’t help much, of course. They get themselves to their feet, their balance a tad shot from their headache, and pack up their things they acquired yesterday, which were stuffed into a duffel bag. It would seem that they ended up sleeping in the same clothes from yesterday too; the ones from the window display. Great.

“Can you make sure this gets back to von Raum?” Lyf asks, intending to hand over the coat to Tim.

“Sure? He’d probably appreciate that from you though.”

“What? Why? Did… Did I do something last night? My head’s a bit, hm, hazy.”

Tim flashes them a smirk, but doesn’t elaborate. “He’s the one who let you have it.”

Lyf got a feeling there was more Tim wasn’t letting on, but they’re not in the mood to try and figure out why. “Okay, fine.”

They slipped on their cloak, taking the duffel with one hand and the sleeping bag in the other. The coat (that they still needed to return to Marius) was put into the duffel for now for safe keeping.

“You need any help with that?” Ashes asks.

“I’m alright, thanks.” Lyf assures them. “I know the way back to the landing craft; I’ll be fine on my own. If anyone asks, that’s where I’ll be. Some fresh air may clear my head as well.”

Lyf kind of wants to follow Tim and Ashes off to wherever the rest of the crew has gone, as they’ve been getting more used to them all, but maybe it’s better they not for the time being. Plus, they’re still not feeling great, and they feel as if a crowd as rowdy as the Mechanisms will only make it worse. They need fresh air and quiet.

The light of day makes Lyf wince as they step out of the pub, but they ignore it as best they can. They bid Ashes and Tim goodbye for the time being and head on their way back to the landing shuttle. They do remember how to get there- a little wooded area near a park away from the more crowded areas- though their steps are a bit slowed. To distract themself, they start to hum the tune they heard in their dream.

Strange that they can recall the song so clearly, but nothing much else about the dream. However, the parts that became stained with rainbow they’d rather not remember, so it’s no loss. What they remember of the song though only sounds like part of it, which is a shame. It was so lovely. They wish there was more they could remember about the song, if there was more to remember.

Eventually Lyf makes their way back to the landing craft and sets their things inside. They sit down on the floor next to the duffel, wishing they’d brought their book with them while they wait for everyone else to return. They did feel a little hungry too- they’d have to get something when they got back to the _Aurora_.

In the meantime, Lyf does take their phone out, intending to message the group to let them know they’re back at the landing craft. They find, however, they’ve already been asked after.

> **i_am_so_a_doctor:** You guys got Lyf with you? They’re not still sleeping, are they? :(
> 
> **Gunfire &Explosions_Tim:** Calm down, they decided to go back to the landing craft. I think they said something about fresh air?
> 
> **ArsonistOfYourDreams** **:** We’re not gonna leave them on this random planet or anything if that’s what you’re concerned about.
> 
> **i_am_so_a_doctor:** You guys left Brian in that star for a century.
> 
> **Drumbot The Pilot** **:** And it was not fun :/

Okay, so that’s concerning that apparently they all left Brian in a star for all that time. That aside, Lyf types out a response.

> **Lyf:** If you all leave me here I will find a way to haunt you until the heat death of the universe
> 
> **i_am_so_a_doctor:** Lyf! :)
> 
> **Archivy:** Good morning, Edda.
> 
> **AlwaysTimeForScience:** There you are, Lyf. We were starting to wonder when you’d be up.
> 
> **Gunfire &Explosions_Tim:** See, they’re perfectly fine. You owe me one, Marius.
> 
> **Lyf:** I just need to be alone for a bit; have a headache from last night. I’ll be waiting for you all back at the landing craft.

Lyf retrieves Marius’s coat and sets it on top of the duffel. They’re still a bit taken aback that Marius had let them use his coat as a pillow. Or maybe he’d offered it to Lyf? They couldn’t recall exactly. Maybe they’d had more to drink than they thought and just ended up passing out on the floor, in which Marius may have just taken pity on them. Either way, they’re going to return it properly. It was only fair, right?

Now that Lyf thinks about it, they think Marius may have been in the dream too before the rainbows started to creep in; the ever shifting hues seeping through the cracks and into their mind. They had been in a place with sculptures and were… talking? They think so, but they can’t really remember what was said. Again, half-remembered, so exact words are escaping them. They do remember feeling sad, and so very tired. They’d closed their eyes just for a second… and then darkness, then the dread of an encroaching nightmare. Then… then warm and safe as it was banished.

The song was the best part though. Lyf still wishes they knew how the rest of it went if there was any more. Maybe one of the others would know it? They wish they had one of the blank books from Ivy’s library so they could write the words they heard down.

Instead of speculating further, Lyf settles on watching whatever nonsense is going on in the group chat, occasionally commenting on things that are happening. They’re starting to feel a little bit more comfortable with the Mechanisms, even with the chaos of yesterday. That’s a good thing, Lyf hopes. It should be worrying, but it’s not. In any case, watching their conversations partially helps distract from their still lingering headache, but not for long as Lyf has to put down the phone again. They should see about getting some painkillers when they’re back aboard the _Aurora_.

They lean their head forward and rest it in their hands, taking a moment to try and center themself. As they do, they mutter aloud, “You’re okay, Lyfrassir; nothing you haven’t dealt with before. You just need some food and water and something for your head.”

They’ve tuned out everything else at this point, so they don’t notice right away that the Toy Solider is the first one to return.

“Good Morning, Lyfrassir~!” It greets, cheerfully.

Lyf starts at the sudden voice, their head snapping up and seeing that it’s just Toy Solider. They breathe a sigh of relief.

“Gods- You’re really good at sneaking up on people.” Lyf remarks. “Could you lower your voice a bit too? Headache.”

“Oh.” Per request, it drops the volume of its voice, but don’t loose the cheery tone. “I Did Not Mean To Sneak Up On You!”

“It’s okay, TS. You’re just… super quiet. I imagine you must make an expert hide and seek player.”

“Hide And Seek Is So Much Fun! I’m Very Good At It! The Others Don’t Hide As Well, But It’s Still Fun.”

“Is everyone else back, or did you just run ahead?” They ask.

“They’ll Be Along Shortly; I Just Got Here First.” It sits down next to them. “Are You Alright, Lyfrassir? You Look Pale.”

“I’m alright, TS.” They manage a smile, though it’s no match to Toy Soldier's. “I forgot mead just goes right to my head sometimes.”

“Would You Like Me To Play You Something?”

“I don’t think that will be neccessary.” They reach over and pat Toy Solider on the shoulder. “But thank you for the offer; truly.”

Lyf thinks it looks pleased with itself, but it’s a bit hard to tell with the constant smiling.

True to its word, the other members of the crew arrive soon after. They can tell by the bickering they hear first.

“You nearly singed my hair off with that one, Ashes!” Jonny complains as he comes into the landing craft. “Watch it with the explosives next time.”

Ashes follows behind him. “Stop whining; you’re fine.”

Lyf grabs the coat for Marius as the rest of them file in, though Lyf almost throws themself off balance due to a combination of their persisting headache and standing too quickly. The latter makes rainbow spots flicker across their vision- no, no, no. Gods, don’t panic about that now. Toy Solider, thankfully, stands with them and grasps Lyf’s arm to keep them steady. The shimmering colors vanish and they give Toy Solider a nod of thanks before seeking out Marius.

He’s the last into the landing craft, trailing behind Ivy and Raphaella, though he instantly smiles when he catches sight of Lyf.

“Good morning, Lyf!” He greets. “We missed you when we went out for breakfast!”

“Well, von Raum, I have a headache, so...” They gesture vaguely at their head, but then they remember the coat in their arms. “I have your coat for you. Thanks for… for lending it to me.”

“Why, thank you!” He takes the coat back and slips it on.

“Why did you let me use it as a pillow?” Lyf asks.

“I thought you might be more comfortable with something under your head, or else you’d complain in the morning. You were still out cold when I got up, so I let you hang onto it while you slept. Though, I was starting to get worried you were sick or something.”

“Nothing some food and painkillers can’t fix. Maybe more sleep. I think I indulged a bit too much on the mead.”

“I figured you might have. You _did_ pass out on me when I found you in the sculpture garden.”

“I did what?” 

“Yeah, you wandered off at some point and I found you staring at one of those weird sculptures.” Marius tells them. “We talked for a little bit and then you fell asleep, so I brought you back to the pub. You were kinda out for the rest of the night.”

“Oh. Okay...” So at least Lyf didn’t do anything to seriously embarrass themself, but now they remember. That hadn’t been part of the dream; that had actually happened. They do remember talking with Marius there, and they also remember falling asleep there. They’d fallen asleep _on Marius_. Lyf still doesn’t remember much of what was said, and at least Marius had been kind enough to take them back to the pub. “I guess… thank you for thinking about me? For looking after me, again.”

“Yeah; anytime.” He smiles and pats Lyf’s shoulder. “I mean it.”

Lyf doesn’t say anything to that, but that doesn’t stop Lyf from staring after Marius as he walks past them. After a moment’s hesitation, they wander over to where he’s chatting with Ivy and Raphaella.

That was… different. Lyf supposed that since being reunited with Marius things had changed a little between them both. No longer did they have the cop-and-prisoner dynamic going on, and yes, Marius could still be annoying, but… Lyf doesn’t think of him the same as they used to. Maybe that’s because Lyf has changed; they know they have. But the other side to this is that now Lyf’s spent a good amount of time in the company of the Mechanisms, unlike before when Lyf would only see Marius, Raphaella, and Ivy every so often. That might be factoring into that a little.

And Marius- Lyf thinks back to yesterday, when Marius said that he was glad they were alive after all. Out of all the possibilities of what could have happened to Lyf after the emergence of the Bifrost’s horrors (Yog-Sothoth and any other squamous things), they think this might be the best of them all. Marius has been surprisingly welcoming of Lyf, and in turn, they… they feel safe around him.

How things have changed indeed.

So, if Lyf’s lingering around Marius on the way back up to the ship- well, they’ll just say they’re a bit dizzy from their headache and ignore everything else.

* * *

Later, when they’re back on the _Aurora_ and back in their room, Lyf decides to take a look at the wound they received while planetside. Their arm feels so much better than it did yesterday; only a dull ache in the relative area of where they were shot.

Unbuttoning their shirt and then removing it entirely, they undo the bandages that Marius had put in place. They still remember the touch of his fingers brushing over their skin. To Lyf’s surprise, the wound almost looks completely healed. That’s… that should be good, but it shouldn’t have healed that fast; they’d been shot.

‘ _Another side effect of the Bifrost?’_ They wonder. Back in Yggdrasil there had been the occasional rumor of “experiments regarding advanced regeneration”, but that was mostly bound to the planets of Asgard and Vanaheim. Lyf never knew if any of those turned out to be real or not (though given what happened with the Ratatosk and the Bifrost, they wouldn’t be surprised), but they were pretty sure they weren’t secretly some science experiment. In any case, Lyf knew their own body had never exhibited this kind of advanced healing before. That left a stark possibility in their mind; the same one responsible for their now silver eyes.

Side effect of the Bifrost or not, they supposed they should be fortunate that it hadn’t been too serious or had just been their arm that was hit. They should be fortunate that the wound has healed as well as it has.

And yet it makes unease roll in their stomach.

After putting their shirt back on, Lyf tries to distract themself by unpacking the clothing and other items they had acquired while planetside. They’d been stuffed into a duffel for travel (including various clothes and a small bag of clasps and ribbons for their hair. Not to mention the couple remaining bottles of mead).

It’s as they’re doing this, they hear a knock on the door. There’s no voice to follow it up, but Lyf goes to see who it is anyway.

When they open the door they don’t see anyone, but they do find that on the floor sits a plate. On the plate are two pieces of toast, a small paper cup with a pill inside, and a note. There’s a glass of water next to the plate as well. They pick up the note, not immediately recognizing the handwriting, but the initials scrawled at the bottom.

> _I know you didn’t have breakfast yet, so I threw this together for you real quick. Got you some water and s_ _omething_ _for your head too._ _It should help, but_ _g_ _ive it a little time to kick i_ _n._
> 
> _-MVR_

Lyf smiles to themself, taking up the plate and glass of water to bring back into their room. They’ll have to thank Marius when next they see him.

* * *

Marius later found Ivy and Raphaella building a pillow fort in the common area of the ship, declaring they were going to watch a movie. They said that Lyf was more than welcome to join in, but he didn’t know where Lyf had run off to since returning aboard. He had initially thought about just texting them, but considered that they might still trying to be sleeping off their headache from earlier in the day. Lyf would more than likely be cranky if he woke them up, so Marius decided against doing that and instead asking Ivy and Raphaella if they knew if they had seen Lyf recently. Raphaella said last she knew they had gone to the observatory, which brings Marius to now.

The observatory was a small room in the upper levels of the ship. It was not a big room by any means, but is a nice enough viewing space for one to observe the vast void of space that surrounds them all most of the time; mostly during travel. When he enters the room, he can see Lyf seated by one of the windows, back to him. Another thing Marius notes is that Lyf seems to be humming something- oh, it’s that song. It was the one he had quietly sung to them after they woke up from whatever nightmare had been attempting to torment them last night. They remembered it.

Lyf hadn’t seemed to notice him yet, and Marius was just about to call out their name, when a meow echoed out into the room. It was then that he saw a tortoiseshell octokitten ooze into view from around Lyf, the same octokitten that had gotten him in trouble with Tim. Marius glared at it, but quickly dropped that when he noticed Lyf had stopped humming. They turned, set a hand atop the octokitten, and finally noticed Marius.

“Oh. Hi." They say

Marius takes that as an invitation to join Lyf by the window. “Raph said you might be here.” He said as he walked over. “You come up here to meditate or something?”

Lyf coaxes the octokitten back to them and Marius sees it crawl up into their lap as he sits next to them. “Not necessarily, but it is quiet. I needed a place like this to relax anyway; my head was still bothering me when I asked Raphaella where to find the observatory.”

“And the octokitten?”

“It followed me, I think. Or just happened to appear. I remember this one from when it fell out of the vent and started clinging to my leg.”

“Ah.” He looked from the octokitten, perfectly content from where it lay and with Lyf gently petting it, and back to them. "I take it your headache's gone?"

"Mostly, yes. That reminds me; thank you for the food and medicine you left me earlier, von Raum. It helped."

Lyf seems to have gone back to referring to him just as "von Raum", but he's glad they're okay. He decides to move on to the main reason he came up here looking for them in the first place.

“Raphaella and Ivy are making a pillow fort down in the common area.” He said.

Lyf tilts their head. “For what?”

“To watch a movie. They said you can come if you want.”

“Will some of the others be there?”

“There was a message sent out in the group chat, but they’ll probably just wander in on their own. You can just hang around with me if you’re more comfortable with that. Or you don’t have to. Just thought I’d ask.”

Consideration crosses their features. “I think I'd be okay with that. After everything, that actually sounds pretty great.”

And Lyf smiles so softly at him. It’s such a precious, fragile thing. He can only hope this is a sign that they’re doing better.

“Hey, I, uh, heard you singing something when I walked in.” Marius said, changing the subject. “Are you secretly a fan of our music?”

Lyf scoffs. “I know _some_ of your music. You know very well you and your friends made quite a name for themselves in Yggdrasil. Stupid as it sounds, I heard the song in a dream I had while we were planetside. Do you know it? I’ve been wondering if there was any more.”

Of course there’s more of it, Marius sang it to them.

That’s not what he says though. “Sounded like “Sirens”; one of our songs. Ivy can probably pull you a recording.”

“It does have a name then. Why in the world would I dream of it though?” And Marius wants to tell them. He wants to tell the it wasn’t a dream, that he sung it to soothe Lyf back into sleep. He can’t bring himself to, stupidly enough, and Lyf continues talking. “I must picked it up from when you were in the prison with Ivy and Raphaella. I heard you all sometimes sang when you got bored.”

“Uh… yeah, sure.”

Lyf turns away; tilting their head down and continuing to pet the octokitten in their lap. They hum a couple lies of Sirens to the octokitten, and it occurs to Marius that he’s never heard Lyf like this, or sing for that matter. What must they sound like when they sing?

They open their eyes again. “So… Should we get going before they start?”

“If you want to, or if you’d rather stay here-”

“No, I already said I would. Honestly, a movie sounds a bit more calm after yesterday’s excitement. And if they are building a pillow fort, then I want to secure myself a cozy spot.”

“Actually, that sounds like a good idea, now that you mention it.” He gets to his feet. “Let’s go.”

“You’ll have to lead because I still don’t know my way around. This is a damn big ship.”

“That it is! Fear not, I know the way!”

Lyf stands, ocotokitten in their arms, and follows him out of the observatory.

Marius doesn’t know where he stands with Lyf, how they might regard him now, feel about him, but for now this is enough. He’s just happy to have Lyf here.

* * *

Time is weird on the ship without proper day and night cycles, even if the ship itself has it’s own set clocks, but the next few days seem to all blend together at some point.

Lyf finds themself getting more and more settled into life among the Mechanisms as time goes on, though they still tend to favor spending most days in the library. Ivy has plenty for them to do and they like the library in general. They’ve spent some time around other members of the crew on the occasion as well when not in the library. They’ve even managed to strike up a somewhat stable friendship with a few.

They find themself spending more time with Marius as well. He’s really not that bad once Lyf got past all the violin playing (which honestly Lyf doesn’t mind too much as long as it’s not that one song). They’ve gone back to their old format of bickering, but it’s more of a playful nature now. Marius still finds ways to rile them up though, including a few times he tried to surprise Lyf with that one song he’s always tried to play for them. Lyf’s never heard the full version and doesn’t really want to, though they’re sure one day they will whether they want to or not.

Marius seems happy to have them around though, and, really, so is Lyf.

Of course, in between all of that, there’s still the not-so-great moments. Lyf still has the nightmares of the Bifrost on a regular basis. They’re still the same level of “generally awful” that they’ve been experiencing, but leaving them shaken all the same. Something watching, the lingering static that fills their senses, the sadness and isolation that grips their heart. Every time, Lyf wishes they would just stop, but deep down they know it’s not that easy. After it all, after the things that are burned into them, they know they can’t just will the nightmares away.

Especially since they know for a fact, there’s way more than a 35% chance the Bifrost has left its mark on them. Their eyes are key evidence for that.

Lyf’s tried to take up writing poetry as a way to put some form of voice to all of this. It helps a little; these words they write feel like they can explain it better than Lyf ever could with their own voice. Though… they haven’t tried to explain it to anyone else, not even Marius. For now they’ll settle on the words they put to the page. They write about their nightmares, their existential musings, about their lost home, about their time so far with the Mechanisms, and about the people they’re slowly growing to be used to.

(They may or may not have written quite a few poems about Marius in particular)

Above all that, though these evolving friendships and dark visions, Lyf quickly finds that it’s never really a boring day aboard the _Aurora_.

* * *

“What’s so funny?” Marius asks after attempting to do an impression of Thor. He is intending to play the character for the new story after all.

Lyf, meanwhile, is sitting on one of the beds in the medbay and writing something in that book they started carrying around. He’s gotten to spend more time with Lyf since coming back from the planet they’d briefly stopped at, which he’s happy about. Most of the time, Lyf will wander into the medbay and just sit somewhere and write in their book while Marius works on some of his own projects. Sometimes they’ll talk with Marius too. He doesn’t mind this at all; he wants to spend time with Lyf. He’d like to do lots of things with Lyf.

Though, right now, they’re peering over the top of their book and laughing at Marius like he’s told some ridiculous joke. But, more importantly, Marius realizes Lyf is laughing! He got Lyf to laugh again! Apparently something about his rendition of Thor has proved to be funny to them, but- dammit, they’re absolutely adorable.

“You! It’s, ah-” Their laughter calms down into a snicker and they set their book down. “Your impression of him is good, it’s just imagining _you_ as Thor, first off. Second, I feel like, hm…. I feel like Thor was one who, if he had something to say, he’d let you know it. He wasn’t afraid to speak his mind. Now, maybe that was just because of his place in Asgard- he was set to take over after Odin- but he never held back on anything he was feeling. And he gave me the impression of being very tough and very mean at times. That’s what I think anyway. I’d try and channel that energy.”

“You’ve never even met the guy.”

“No, of course I wouldn’t have. Born and raised on Midgard, remember? But Thor was in the Black Box recordings; I’ve seen how he is. I mean, when he found out Loki was alive, I couldn’t tell…” Lyf’s voice starts to go distant, and their expression shifts into a bored, blank stare. “...whether his anger is from seeing the woman who murdered Baldur still lives, or what Odin has done to her mind...”

Marius sees this change, and concerned, he calls out, “Lyf?”

They don’t respond, so he waves a hand in front of their face. Lyf blinks and shakes their head; bringing life back to those starlight eyes.

“Hm? Oh, did I- Sorry.” They apologize.

“It’s okay. You good? You got a bit spacey there for a second.”

“Yeah, I’ve found that sometimes if I think too much on the investigation, I can get a little- I’m not sure what the word would be, but I just loose myself for a moment. My head’s still… you know...” They gesture vaguely at nothing in particular.

Marius doesn’t need them to explain, or apologize. He gets the idea. All of them here on the _Aurora_ have been messed up in one way or another. He’s no exception.

“I do, Lyf. We all do.” He says, a bit more quietly.

“Anyway, Thor was on the train when it disappeared, and you three showed up after. Therefore, you wouldn’t have met him either.”

“Okay, sure. I still think I did pretty good with that impression though.” Marius continues to insist.

“Hm.” Lyf looks back down at their book, resuming whatever they’re writing.

“What’ve you been writing in that anyway? I mean in that book you got there.”

They don’t look up, but their shoulders hunch, as if they’re annoyed. Oh- Lyf _does_ look annoyed now. Oops.

“Nothing that concerns you.” The answer crisply.

“Just curious. You’re usually writing in it these days. Don’t tell me you write music too- is that it? Are you working on a song? Do you play an instrument? I can talk to Jonny about making you a part of the band!”

“I _did_ play an instrument; it was a cello. And I’m not writing any music, it’s...” They stop short, as if holding something back. Then they pursed their lips and gave their answer. “If you must know, it’s poetry. I’ve…started writing poetry again.”

Answered question of what or if Lyf played an instrument aside, Marius isn’t too surprised, not after finding them reading a book of Midgardian poetry once in the library. Still, when he had first met Lyf, he wouldn’t have thought them to be a poet. In fact, his first impression of Lyf had been “snarky and weary cop who looks so done with everything, and is also maybe a little cute?”. He had never gotten to know much about Lyf when they were on Midgard to begin with. Apparently that hadn’t stopped him from getting a crush on them.

“Poetry.” Marius repeats.

Lyf rolls their eyes. “Yes, poetry. That is something I do, von Raum. Please don’t make me regret telling you.”

“Now, Lyf, why would I do that?”

“Need I remind you? First time I took one of your violins you complained I had no sense of humor. Or music.”

“I mean… you did seem like just another boring cop.”

Lyf scowls. “Inspector Second Class. Don’t know why I bother; it’s ‘former’ now. Doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things.”

Yes, that was back when he was still in the prison and before Lyf had been assigned to reviewing the Black Box. Back then, Lyf had been more of a reserved person. They had opened up a bit since coming aboard the Aurora, and Marius is getting to see more sides to Lyf than he knew before, and keeps reminding him why he’d gotten so attached to this mortal.

“Is there, uh… anything… interesting you want to share?” He asks awkwardly “The poetry!”

They close their book, drawing it close to their chest. They start fidgeting with their ring, which Marius assumed was a nervous habit of theirs. “I’d rather not….”

Well, so much for that, but if Lyf doesn’t want to share that’s okay. “That’s fine. Completely fine! Some personal work I take it?”

“You could say that.”

“Right. I get it- I mean, I have my own stuff I work on sometimes too. Music mostly.”

Lyf’s eyes flicker back to him. “You? Write music?”

“Come on, don’t give me that look.” He teases. “Jonny may do most of our writing for the band, but most of us have some other projects on the side. I’m not entirely sure what everyone else does, but we all have our own thing.”

“You didn’t write that song you keep trying to play me, did you?”

“Nope. That one was Jonny.”

“Ah, so I can blame him for your number one method of being an irritating idiot.”

There’s something in the tone of Lyf’s voice when they say that that makes Marius laugh. “You wanna hear some?”

Lyf’s quiet at this. He doesn’t expect them to say yes, given how they’ve reacted to his violin playing in the past, but he also doesn’t expect, “...would you be okay with that?”

Marius isn’t sure about how to respond. He’d been partially joking, but he’d play something for Lyf if they so asked. Lyf had never seemed keen on his music tough. “I wasn’t really expecting you to ask that… Are you feeling alright? You sure you don’t have a fever or something?”

“What are you on about? I’m fine. And you’re the one who asked if I wanted to hear you play something.”

“Yeah, but you’ve never really been a fan of my music.”

“Because you always played the same thing.” Lyf sighs, pinching the bridge of their nose. Maybe they had a point; he had overplayed that one quite a bit back in the prison. “Look, as long as it’s not that dumb song, it’s fine. My request was sincere.”

“If you say so. There’s some stuff I’m working on I’m not quite ready to share, but I’ve got a few things that I’m fine with. You know what- I actually have the perfect piece in mind. And no, before you ask, it’s not the ‘whiskey laced with gasoline’ thing again. It’s something else. Actually I think you’ll be the first to hear it.”

“Uh, well- only if you want.”

Marius wants to; he really wants to.

“Just for you, Lyf.” He punctuates this with a wink.

He doesn’t give any time for Lyf to respond, already acquiring a violin. Marius tended to keep one lying around since he tends to do much of his music composition in the medbay (barely anyone needed to be in here anyway). He rests the bow upon the violin strings and begins to play a song called “Shrove Tuesday” for them.

And he plays the song as if it’s the night they last spent planetside, as if they’re both back in that pub, except this time, he is playing this song just for Lyf. It’s a solo performance just for them. It’s all for them.

He puts down the violin when he’s done. Lyf’s book is set to the side, forgotten. They’ve been quiet this entire time, a look of contemplation on their face. They don’t look displeased or anything, unlike in the prison, so he assumes that’s a good sign. Maybe. Lyf’s never really been quiet about his singing.

“That… wasn’t that bad.” They say at last. “It’s nice. A bit sad, but nice.”

He beams at them. “Why, thank you, Lyfrassir! I knew I’d be able to win you over with my violin eventually!”

“Please. That was all I’d hear from you, for the most part. I’m used to your music. And… as irritating as you can be, you’re… you’re not… that bad with a violin.”

“So you do like it!”

“Shut up.” They say that, but Marius can see the smile they’re trying to hide.

“Now that you say that, and now that I know you play an instrument, maybe we can write something together.” Marius suggests. “You’re a poet, after all!”

“That doesn’t extend to song writing.” But after a pause, Lyf quietly adds, “...Maybe.”

Something about that possibility actually sounds pleasant, and keeps him smiling. He’s glad to see Lyf becoming more comfortable, and maybe more happy. Maybe whatever poetry they’ve been writing is helping them work through all the Bifrost stuff. Everyone had an outlet for these things. Also, thinking about writing some kind of music with them- that’s another thing to add to the Lyf-related daydreams he’s found his mind wandering to lately.

(He also may or may not have a song he wrote about Lyf, for Lyf, but that’s for another day)

* * *

They find their mind wandering as they lay atop their bed listening to Sirens as the audio file plays through their datapad, listening for the familiar sound of a violin (they know Nastya also plays violin, but not on this song). As Lyf’s senses are filled with the voices and the melody of the song, specifically the violin portion, they can’t help but recall earlier when Marius was playing that other song. It reminds Lyf of their dream, where someone was singing to them- oh Gods, had they dreamed about Marius singing Sirens to them?

Well… whether they did or not, Lyf had found themself mesmerized by the song Marius had played for them before. It occurred to Lyf that- yes, even back on Midgard- Marius was at his most lively when singing and playing music, and… Lyf liked that. Even when he was doing it just to push their buttons, there was something about seeing him come alive with so much energy and passion that always stayed with Lyf.

They’d seen that again today, and, really, if they were being honest with themselves, it was one of their favorite things about Marius.

And speaking of which, he had suggested to Lyf that they write something together; some music. They hadn’t been sure what to say to that- what would they even write songs about? The years they knew each other when Lyf was still a cop and Marius was still a prisoner? Actually that probably wasn’t a bad place to start.

...Huh. They were actually considering writing songs with Marius von Raum.

“Dammit, you’ve grown on me.” Lyf mutters aloud, as if Marius is in the room with them.

They sit up and reach over for the book he’d taken from the library to starting writing poetry in, opening it to a new page. A lot of their poetry has been varried and an outlet for their more darker thoughts, but this time, they intend to do something different.

Marius is… a confusing subject for Lyf. Something has changed between them, but Lyf isn’t sure how they feel about it. This wouldn’t be the first time they’ve written something in here about Marius, but currently this is the only way Lyf knows how to try and make sense of this feeling.

So they let the words flow and do that talking for them.

* * *

It’s late, according to the ship’s central time; sometime after midnight. Not that it matters to Lyf at the moment.

It’s quiet as they walk the corridors of the _Aurora_. Most would be asleep right now, but that’s not the case for Lyf, due to another nightmare. It was one of the bad ones this time, so yeah; no sleep for them tonight.

The point is, they can’t sleep, so now they’re wandering about with no clear destination in mind. If anything, they can maybe head over to the library. Ivy didn’t really sleep and she was fine with them stopping by last time this happened. She was a good friend. Or maybe they can go to the observatory and stare out at the stars for a while.

Lyf briefly wonders if Marius is awake, and- no, he’s likely sleeping too. Best not to bother him.

...They’ve been thinking about Marius a lot lately.

When Lyf had first met Marius, along with Ivy and Raphaella, they had been working for the New Midgard Transport Police for around two years. Lyf had been given a case that made a note to visit the three bandits that were being held for various crimes, and of course Lyf had heard the stories. They hadn’t been quite sure what to expect from the three, but in the end they had taken an instant dislike. And of those three, Marius had always been the one who stood out and to whom Lyf’s mind drifted to.

Marius had always engaged with Lyf the most, while Ivy and Raphaella observed. He always seemed to get some enjoyment out of their conversations and sometimes Lyf would catch him staring at them for some reason. He seemed to enjoy finding new ways to push Lyf’s buttons just for the fun of it, much to their displeasure. The stupid antics with the violins were just to top it all off. Though… there were times- sometimes if Lyf was having a bad enough day and had to go see Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella, their conversations were… different slightly. Marius would always provide some stupid joke or a story, saying once he was trying to make Lyf laugh. Maybe he had been…

Ending up being found by the Mechanisms on pure chance and seeing Marius again- well, at first Lyf didn’t want any part of it, but that wasn’t right. There was that part of them that was happy they had been found, that they weren’t going to die alone in the void. And it was Marius who had been there when they woke up (well, Jonny had been there too, but that wasn’t relevant to these thoughts). They’d been annoyed, yes, but there was something else there… some sort of relief at seeing him again.

Maybe it was because when Lyf found out the three had escaped and were not coming back this time, they felt a bit hurt, in a strange way. At the time, they weren’t sure why they felt that way, but blamed it on the fact everything was about to fall apart around them. Still, back then, they didn’t know what they’d been expecting, given the reputation of the bandits, but it was a constant of Lyf’s life that was now gone. Those who were aware of what was to come had left them to their fate. That was what Lyf told themselves, and it was partially true.

In truth, looking back, Lyf missed the three. In particular, they missed Marius, who was boisterous in nature but had a smile that could light up a room. Who liked to mess with them, but were never cruel. Who, despite being a nuisance, tried to make Lyf laugh, and always had some foolish or witty remark. Lyf realized they felt hurt by that loss the most.

Lyf stopped in their steps. They _missed_ Marius. They had missed him a lot. And now he was back in their life.

And Lyf liked being around him more now. The familiarity of having him near and how their conversations sometimes tipped back into what they were used to. He always seemed the more optimistic and high spirited of the crew, and more than once had shown care for Lyf, which was unexpected but appreciated. Marius, admittedly had his moments that made Lyf smile or laugh; making their heart feel light and not weighed down by other dreadful things. It was a pleasant feeling that only seemed to happen when they were around-

Oh… Oh Gods. _Marius_ made that happen. It was Marius. Oh…

‘ _But w_ _hy?’_ Lyf can’t get their thoughts straight. _‘ Okay, yes, Marius isn’t as bad as I first thought, but why am I- why does he make me feel like this?_ _Do I, maybe- is what I’m feeling… Oh, Gods; I think it might be._ _’_

But they don’t know for sure. So, they sigh, sitting down on the floor and up against the wall.

‘ _What if I have feelings for Marius...?’_

And what the Hel were they supposed to do with that if they did?

Maybe they can go see Nastya? Aside from Ivy, they felt Nastya was more approachable and maybe knew more about these things, since she was in a relationship herself. They’ve talked with her before and that had been okay, though they wandered down to engineering purely on accident last time and she wasn’t too happy to have been woken from her slumber. What of the other two who had been with Marius in the prison? Raphaella? She was a scientist. Or Ivy maybe, if she wasn’t too busy. That might be their best bet.

Lyf’s thoughts are cut short when they hear footsteps coming down the corridor. They can’t exactly tell who it is just by the sound alone, but it could be just about anyone. Also it sounds like it’s coming closer- Yup, time to go. They’re not exactly in a mood for talking to anyone like this. They get up off the floor and start back down where they came-

“Lyf?” A voice calls from behind. It makes them stop.

Dammit. It’s Marius.

Lyf tries to put on a neutral expression as they turn to face him, as if they weren’t just pondering if they had a crush on him or not. “Yes, von Raum?”

“Didn’t think you’d be up.” He says. “Can’t sleep?”

“Can’t sleep.” They confirm, walking over to Marius. Now that they look closer, they can see something’s not right. He’s holding his metal hand close to his chest, and- oh, shit. “Fuck me; what happened to your hand?”

“Uh… maybe later?” He gives a half-hearted smile.

Lyf sighs at his joking response, exasperated. “ _Your hand_. What did you do?”

“Got it smashed in a door. Jonny stole my hat and in the process of trying to get it back, this happened.” He holds out his hand for Lyf to see. They don’t miss how he winces at the movement. “It’s not as bad as it looks.”

They doubt that. From what Lyf can see, a couple of his fingers look slightly crooked and any movement looks stiff. They can believe his story about getting his hand damaged by a door closing on it, though Lyf finds themself worried; something in them giving an ache at imagining if Marius feels any pain from this.

“Sure, because it looks like you can barely move your fingers. Doesn’t that hurt?”

Marius shrugs. “Yeah, it hurts a little, but it’s nothing I can’t fix. There’s been far worse done to me.”

So maybe this is a normal thing and he’s used to it, but it still doesn’t stop Lyf from worrying. Maybe it’s because of that worry they gently take Marius’s hand, examining it. Or maybe it’s because they want to have the feeling of his hand in theirs again.

...Okay, that’s so not helping with their internal debate from earlier, but they’ll have to analyze that at another time.

“Can I do anything?” Lyf asks. “Looks like it might be a little tricky on your own and with one working hand.”

“You don’t need to.” Lyf drops his hand, feeling a bit disappointed. They shouldn’t be, but Marius has helped them before, and this time they want to help him. “I mean it’s- I appreciate your offer, but I don’t know if you can- dammit that sounds worse.”

“Von Raum, it’s late and I’m not going back to sleep any time soon. I don’t hate you so much that I would leave you to your own devices when you’re clearly in pain.”

“Well… It would be useful with another pair of hands to help. It’s really just fixing up the joints and putting them back in place.”

“Sounds simple enough.” Lyf concludes. “Like fixing a dislocated limb.”

“When you put it that way, I guess.”

They smile and nod. “Lets get to work then.”

* * *

“Okay, let me know if you can feel this.” Lyf says, a second before they snap a joint back into place.

“Ah! Shit- of course I can feel that, you smug bastard.”

“Shush, it was a valid question.”

Marius lets out a huff, but settles back down. As it turns out, most of the damage is confined to the fingers, which Lyf can work with. They’re currently sitting on one of the cots in the medbay while Lyf does what they can. It’s nothing too complicated, but they did make sure to tell Marius to let them know if were any specific components to be aware of. This was a bit different from working with a regular limb of flesh and bone.

“So, you can still feel things with this? I mean, I guess you can if you can still feel pain when, say, for example, you have a door close on your hand.”

“The tech that went into my arm is a little advanced.” Marius explains. “Funny thing is, after all this time, I still don’t completely understand it, and I wasn’t exactly paying attention when this was first done. Something about the circuitry interfacing directly with my nervous system? There’s a lot of wires and shit if you open up the panel on my palm.”

“I see. That’s impressive; fascinating, really.” They let their fingers linger on the metal longer than necessary. “Whoever crafted your arm must have put a lot of time and effort into it.”

Lyf thinks nothing of what they just said, but then starts to think otherwise when they glance up and see Marius; looking away from them and downcast. Lyf can't recall ever seeing him like this.

Oh Gods, what had they said?

“Von Raum?” They try to get his attention by bringing Marius’s hand into both of theirs. “...Hey- Marius?”

That works this time. He blinks and looks back. “Yeah, um-” He shakes his head. “It’s nothing that you- You know how we became immortal, right?”

Lyf knows a little bit, because they had asked Raphaella once. Each of them had a kind of “device” that had granted them immortality. The devices were also where the group’s namesake came from; a Mechanism. Raphaella’s, for instance, was her wings.

“Raphaella told be some time ago.” Lyf answers.

“Right. Well… mine’s my arm you’re working on.” Not a surprise to Lyf. They had already guessed at it. Raphaella did say a few were more easy to tell than others. “It’s why I ended up here, but it also wouldn’t be the first time someone’s found it “fascinating”. The person who gave me this arm, made me and everyone here immortal, was all too eager to record the results. It wasn’t a good time, Lyf, for any of us. We didn’t ask for this.”

Then it clicks into place. Raphaella may have allowed Lyf to know about her wings, but there had been something else she said; that most of the crew didn’t like to talk about the circumstances of their immortality, or “mechanization”. There was another time they’d been hinted on this subject, when Ivy had first shown Lyf the library. She had said that the crew had not always been immortal, and that she would rather not talk about how she became this way herself. It wasn’t hard to figure out that whatever a “mechanization” involved wasn’t good and was likely done against their will.

That’s how Lyf knows they’ve made a mistake.

They let go of Marius’s hand again. “I’m sorry if I brought up a terrible memory for you. I’ve had it hinted to me that whatever happened to you and the others, it was… bad. You don’t have to explain any further. I understand. I won’t ask you to.”

And Lyf means it. They remember when Marius had asked after their poetry, he respected their wish not to recite any, since a good chunk of it was personal and their attempt to work through their trauma. If Marius doesn’t want to explain anything more regarding how he became immortal, then Lyf will respect that. They may have had their differences in the past, but Lyf is not cold.

“You’re okay; seriously.” Marius tells them. “You didn’t know. But, yeah, I’d rather not talk about what happened. It was a complicated situation.”

They nod in understanding, taking his hand again. “Let’s continue. Let me know if it hurts; I’ll be as careful as I can.”

For a few minutes, they exchange only a few words, but when Lyf finishes putting the last of the joints in his fingers back into place, he asks, “Would you believe me if I told you I once piloted a giant robot?”

Lyf pauses, processing this. Then they laugh. “You? Giant Robots? What?”

“It’s true! A long, long time ago I did pilot a giant robot. It was before I became… well, immortal, but it was one hell of a time.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

This prompts Marius to make them both some tea and start into a tale involving exactly that; giant robots. Lyf doesn’t know if this is just some random story he’s making up or if it’s actually true, but the image of Marius piloting a giant robot- hm… it’s an interesting image.

Wait, what? Nope. Not the time. File that away for… later?

By the time the tale is done, they actually start to feel tired again. Maybe more time has passed than they thought, or maybe it was the tea Marius made them, or maybe it was something about the story that was making them relax. Regardless, at this point they’re only half paying attention to anything Marius is saying. All they can do is follow and nod along to whatever new story he’s moved on to. Eventually, they feel a hand on their shoulder, and then they’re being pushed down to the bed.

“-look like you’re gonna pass out.”

Oh. Marius had been saying something. And now they’re laying on the bed. Right. “I’ll… I’ll just be going then.”

“Nope. You’re already laying down, so don’t try and get up.” Marius insists. “You can stay there; I don’t mind.”

“I guess...”

They still see Marius in their field of vision, sitting off to the side, but he’s not really looking at them. “Hey, uh, thanks for helping with my hand. It feels a whole lot better. I can ask Brian to take a look in the morning if something still feels out of place.”

“Huh?” Lyf mutters, trying to stay focused. “Wait, if Brian was an option, then why did you let me...?”

“You’re the one who insisted.” He turned his head and smiled gently at them. “I wasn’t going to turn you down.”

They open their mouth to say something else, but whatever words they were going to say don’t come out and their eyes slipped closed.

There’s a chuckle. “Get some sleep, Lyf.”

It’s the last thing they hear- well, not the last thing. A moment later they hear the soft melody of a violin, lulling them into sleep.

* * *

Lyf’s fast asleep in no time at all, so he sets the violin aside, looking them over. Marius is tempted to put his coat over them but grabs the blanket he’d given them the first time they were in the medbay and places that over them instead. It’s a familiar scene, except this time Lyf’s in a much better state than that first day.

‘ _Looks like that worked.’_ He thought to himself.

They’d looked a bit tense when they came across them in the hall, though they had said they were up wandering about since they couldn’t sleep. That wasn’t too unusual; Lyf had been a bit of a workaholic in the past. Marius had once even made a joke once that they survived off coffee and spite alone. But Lyf had taken the time to work on his hand, and they had gradually seemed to relax over the course of it. Now here they were.

Marius wondered if he should stay here, in case Lyf had a nightmare or something. No, it’d be okay. Lyf would be fine on their own. They’d be…

He sighs. Lyf was resilient and stubborn to no end, but he also knew Lyf was hurting. Marius also knew that there was not much he could do about it. God knows it took him a while to come to terms with his own immortality when he was mechanized. Lyf hadn’t become immortal, as far as he knew, but he knew the Bifrost messed them up. The silver eyes were a mark of that. 

The eyes showed that Lyf had survived, though surely being the last living person of an entire star system was a harsh reality to bear. Lyf was here though, and not dead or worse. Marius had left them behind when he fled with the others, and as much as he tried to live with that, there was still regret. Damn the fact that Lyf was mortal and going back for them would have been pointless- he had missed Lyf. Now he had Lyf back, even if they had been changed by what they had seen and gone through; it was still Lyf.

He wouldn't make that mistake again.

Marius notes the way Lyf’s hair falls into their face; they hadn’t even bothered to put it up or anything. He begins to reach over, wanting to push their hair back, but he stopped himself. Best to leave them be and sleep.

He gets up and writes a note to leave for Lyf; thanking them again. He then heads back to his own room, reminding himself to check on Lyf if they were still there come time for breakfast.

* * *

“Alright, I think I have most of the Midgard items sorted from the rest.” They announce, placing one more book with the rest in boxes labeled “Yggdrasil Collection- Midgard”. “I’m still sorting the Asgard items, but I’ve also started on Vanaheim.”

“Good.” Ivy replies from a desk she’s sitting at, looking over something on her datapad. “We’re making excellent progress.”

“We are.” They let their fingers linger over the cover the book they just set down. “Thank you for allowing me to help with this. It puts my mind at ease to know something of Yggdrasil will live on.”

“Yggdrasil was enveloped by the Bifrost- Yog-Sogoth, as we both know- leaving you as the sole survivor; a caretaker of memory. I may have assigned you to this position because of any further knowledge you had of the system, but it seems only right now to have you help build this.”

And Lyf’s very fortunate for that. These things can’t restore what they’ve lost, but they exist. If they are there, and these books and relics are here, then Yggdrasil is not truly dead. Lyf will make sure of that.

“Ivy, if it’s alright with you, I would like to propose an idea.”

She looks up from the datapad. “What you you have in mind?”

“I’ve been thinking, as we work on this.” They walk over to the desk. “All of this is great, really, but part of me wants to do something more. If I am a the caretaker of the memory of Yggdrasil, as you say, then why don’t I do something about it? To point, I’ve been thinking about the possibility of using what you’ve gathered, to make a general work of Yggdrasil to be somehow published, if such a thing can be done.”

“I think that’s a kind thing for you to do. You have the proper tools at your disposal to do so.”

“Yes, but, there’s something else. I don’t know if I can organize this project alone. That said, I would like you to help me. I figured we could work on it together.”

To her credit, Ivy looks surprised by this request. She’s silent, but then slowly gets up from her chair and comes over to Lyf, placing a hand on their shoulder and giving them a smile.

“I would love to help you.” She says. “It could be a collaborative work!”

“Sounds about what I had in mind.”

“This is going to be fun! I think once we get more of the Yggdrasil collection sorted, we can start looking at our new project.”

“Of course; understandable.”

They go back to sorting out the Asgard items after that, but they soon find Ivy has already announced their project to the rest of the group via the group chat. Lyf reads some of the comments that result, rolling their eyes at a few. Even Marius sends a message that just reads “nerds :)”, but Lyf knows that’s just how he is.

“Von Raum says we’re nerds.” They say to Ivy, but with a fond smile on their face.

“Of course he does.” She replies with a chuckle. “Don’t mind him; he’s only teasing.”

“Oh, I know. He’s just like that.”

They don’t meet her eyes as they say this, but they feel a blush rise to their cheeks. They’re still debating whether or not they have developed feelings for Marius, but the more Lyf thinks about it, the longer they linger on all the interactions they’ve had with him. Even so, what reason would there be to assume Marius would feel the same? Lyf had never hated him, not truly, and maybe they’ve warmed up a bit to him, but it doesn’t matter because Marius probably doesn’t feel that way about them. So there’s nothing, and there’s nothing for Lyf either… right? Ah, great, now they’re thinking about it again.

So Lyf returns to sorting and cataloging some more things for the collection. They even pick out a couple things relating to Asgard to skim through. Having lived on Midgard for pretty much all their life up until recently, and post-revolution and no less, Lyf had never known too much about Asgard. Even after the Bifrost Incident had thrown the government into chaos, the planet was more reclusive and guarded. It’s a part of Yggdrasil that deserved to be here all the same, especially if Lyf and Ivy were going to be working together on a project about Yggdrasil.

Lyf’s honestly looking forward to that, when they get around to it of course. Having everything at least semi-organized first would help. Still, it felt good, knowing that this was something they’d be working on in the near future. It would be a good thing.

* * *

It stays with them through the day. The thought stays with them; of working with Ivy to create a collaborative work of Yggdrasil and somehow publishing it together. Yggdrasil may be gone, but in this way, at least something of it can live on. They’re doing a good thing, and they’ve got Ivy to help.

But that thought leads to something else, bringing up a darker thought. A darker truth. Because even with this, it didn’t erase or change what had happened. The Yggdrasil system had not ended with a bang, nor with a whimper, but with a cacophony of panicking, screaming voices that Lyf had heard over a half working radio com as they fled from the system. Those sounds haunted them too, the sounds of their world as it died in a nebula of color. And Lyf knew the reason why.

Because _that’s_ contained within them too.

Because they _know._

Because they had _seen_ it.

Because nobody knows but _them_.

Because Lyf knows and yet wants the story of what they saw to be _known_ , like they want the existence and history of Yggdrasil to be, in a vain hope to take some of this pain away.

* * *

Sitting on the floor of their room, Lyf takes their backpack they had fled Yggdrasil with and open it up. All the possessions they had put into it are scattered around the room… save for one.

The polished black metal of the Black Box stares up at Lyf from the bottom of the bag.

Taking a deep breath, Lyf reaches in and closes their fingers around the cube. It’s cold to the touch and the familiar feel of it in their hand gives Lyf chills. They pull the Black Box from the bag and hold it out in front of them. Light bounces off the sides in rainbow colors and it makes Lyf feel slightly ill. They haven’t touched this thing since they put it into their bag and left Midgard. They had kept it on the grounds that even if it was a cursed object that exposed them to the horrors of the Bifrost, literally and figuratively, it was an accurate record of what lead to the collapse of everything they knew.

Lyf also remembers that the Mechanisms were working on making a story out of it. They’ve already sat in on one of the practice sessions as the crew all tried to weave something together from the data they had beforehand (and a few tapes Lyf had initially done and Ivy had made off with at some point before leaving Midgard. Although as Lyf found out, the tapes were partially corrupted thanks to the Bifrost). Lyf knows what they could really use was a transcript. They’re also very much aware they have a way to make one, though they have not mentioned that the Black Box was still in their possession.

The point was that, the Mechanisms told their stories through songs wherever they went. Jonny asked for their story once when they first met, to add to the band’s collection, and while they had not promised anything, they have thought about it. Lyf’s heard a couple of the band’s tales by now, and as tragic as those they’ve heard may be, those tales are living on; their stories are being told.

So that gave Lyf an idea.

This certain idea they have in mind- It’s bad and they know it. However, the reasoning Lyf tells themself is that their tale will at least live on through the Mechanisms, should something happen to them while they’re in the group’s company. They’re not immortal.

They bring the Black Box closer to them and run their fingers across the surface some more, remembering how to get into the recordings it holds, and for a moment, Lyf hears a low hum and rainbows creep into their vision. Lyf closes their eyes and tries to take some calming breaths, like Brian had taught them. Once they feel a bit more calm, they open their eyes.

“If they’re going to tell my story, I want it to be done accurately.” They declare to themself. “What happened to Yggdrasil won’t be a mystery lost to the void.”

They get up from the floor and grab an empty book they had taken from the library on the basis of writing some poetry in it (which wasn’t entirely a lie, but Lyf had taken a separate one for that). They place the book and the Black Box on their bed and go find something to write with.

Once they’re all set up, they open the book to the first blank page, then looking over to the Black Box. Lyf doesn’t have any of their notes from their initial investigation, so they’ll have to rely on the recordings for some of this.

They look down at the blank pages, and bring the pen to paper.

> _“The Bifrost Incident. Any school child could tell you about it...”  
>  _

* * *

Lyf keeps writing until they get to the part about Odin’s speech during the launch of the Ratatosk Express.

They know what they’re going to do, which recording to find.

And, with trepidation surging through their veins, they open the Black Box and find what they’re looking for.

* * *

Lyf continues until they finish writing about the initial discovery of Loki, and Thor learning that she was still alive. When they’re done they close down the Black Box, shut the book, and put both under their bed.

Their legs feel shaky as they stand again, rainbow shimmers dancing in and out through their sight. They feel drained. They feel cold. Their mind still replays the words in the recordings- Odin, Loki, Thor towards the end of that last one.

They want to sleep.

Lyf gets back into bed, and are out the second their head hits the pillow; consciousness snuffed out like a candle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Told you I'd be using the Black Box for something.
> 
> I am planning a bit of an interlude chapter next (which will focus on various interactions Lyf has with the rest of the Mechs) as a bit of a break before moving on to the second half of this fic, so I'll have that up when I can. Thank you for all the kudos and comments on this so far though. you're all fantastic ^^


	5. Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A series of interactions between Lyf and the Mechanisms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Sorry for being away for so long. When I first started writing this chapter I had also begun writing Wayfarers, which then really took off. I've also gotten involved in a big project since the last update, so this sorta fell to the wayside. Also, I have still been working full time during this whole... *gestures to the very much obvious bad things going on in the world*- so there's that.
> 
> To those who have read and left comments in the meantime, thank you so much <3
> 
> (Note: Warning for brief and slight mention of memory loss on Ivy's part)

_Nastya_

It’s pleasantly warm in engineering, the way Nastya prefers it. There’s a reason why it’s her favorite place on the ship. Here she can be close to Aurora, her love, and forget about the quicksilver blood that runs in her veins, if only for a little while. The cold only serves to remind her of darker days; of when it was just her and Jonny. She’s cold most times, but being here helps drive most of it away.

At present, she’s curled up in her nest of blankets and pillows she’s dragged down here. She’s comfortable and warm, and her love is here.

She’s just about to doze off when she hears the sound of footsteps from somewhere, within the tangle of machinery that made up the engineering sector. With a sigh, she goes for her pistol hidden under one of her pillows.

“Who is there? I’m trying to sleep.” She says as she rolls over and aims her pistol in the general direction of where the footsteps are coming from.

“Oh Gods- don’t shoot me, please! It’s just Lyf!”

Oh. Right. The new one.

“Lyfrassir.” She drops the pistol. “Stop hiding.”

They come out from the shadows cast by the machinery; hair pulled up messily and silver eyes seeming to glow slightly brighter in the dim light. They look startled, but Nastya ignores this in favor of wondering what the hell they’re doing here.

“Why are you down here?” She decides to ask.

“I, uh- I-I didn’t know you were here.” Lyf replies. “I… may have gotten a bit lost? I was taking a walk about the ship and I don’t completely know where everything is yet. I didn’t mean to disturb you. Wait, were you sleeping here?”

She fixes them a glare. “I always sleep here. It’s warm here.”

“Okay then…. Again, I apologize; I just couldn’t sleep and I thought a walk would clear my head.”

Nastya studies their face; how tired they look. Now, Nastya had only returned five years ago, gone for nearly a century, so she didn’t understand the whole story.

From what she understood, the rest of the Mechanisms had arrived in the Yggdrasil system and gone about their usual business of violence, adventure, and fun. Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella had somehow ended up getting stuck in a prison for 60 years, but that was where Lyf came in. They had apparently taken an interest to Lyf in the time they knew each other. Then one day a train appeared that had been missing for 80 years. Lyf had been assigned to investigate it, but the investigation ended with Lyf fleeing their home, everything they knew, as the entirety of the Yggdrasil system was devoured by some kind of cosmic force only referenced as the “Bifrost”. Lyf had lost everything, and was the only one left alive.

Nastya has seen the end of worlds before, it was nothing new, but she does feel bad for Lyf. It is a terrible burden to be left as the only survivor of your world. She wouldn’t be surprised if they were traumatized after all that. She too was the lone survivor of something terrible; she was the last of the Romanovas after all. She’s the only one left of a family she once had, that had perished because she urged the Tsar, her father, to let the protesters carry on in peace. And now she carries the same burden that Lyf does.

Maybe it’s because of that she asks, “Would you like to come sit for a while? I won’t shoot you.”

“I… I guess?”

She pats the space next to her and after a moment, Lyf decides to move forward, joining her next to her pile of blankets and pillows.

“I think this is the first time we’ve properly spoke to each other.” Nastya says.

Lyf looks over at her. “Outside of the times I’ve seen you at breakfast, yes. The rest of the crew refers to you as the “resident cryptid” sometimes.”

She shrugs it off. “They do that. I spent most of my days here; doing my daily checks on the ship’s systems and doing any necessary repairs. I can be close to Aurora here as well; her main interface systems are in this section. This place keeps me warm too; helps fight off the cold I feel.”

A vague response, she knows, but she doesn’t expect anyone else to understand how her blood makes her feel like she’s freezing constantly. None of the others had their own blood become their mechanism. Well, Brian kind of understood, but only because he had been tossed into space and left to die.

“It is rather warm in here. Are you cold a lot?”

“Yes, because of my blood. My blood makes me cold.”

“Oh… Okay. Well, if being here helps you, then that’s good.”

She relaxes against the pillows she’s piled here. “I’m a bit curious. As you may have heard, I haven’t been around in a while. I do not know much about what went on while the rest of the crew was running around your star system. Yggdrasil, I think it was called?”

“Yes.” Lyf nods. “More specifically I’m from a planet called Midgard.”

“Midgard.” She repeats. “...If you feel comfortable doing so, could you tell me more about Midgard, or anything of the Yggdrasil system?”

“I can do that, but Ivy has a lot of information on Yggdrasil too. Why me?”

“You’re here. Might as well find something to pass the time until you decide to leave.”

“I guess there is some worth in sharing such information; that someone else knows beside myself….” Their voice trails off a little, but they shake their head and resume speaking. “Where do I even start? The Yggdrasil system, as a whole, was separated into three sectors. In the second sector, was my home planet of Midgard. I lived in our planet’s capital city of New Midgard. Odd to name your own capital city after the planet, I know, but it was meant to be a symbol to the efforts of the Midgardian Resistance during the revolution.”

Nastya listens as Lyf tells her about their home; about the city they lived in, about their life there, about the revolution that had taken place before their time, about how their world tried to rebuild itself, and then when the Black Box showed up on their desk. She finds herself listening with interest, mostly at the parts about the revolution that had taken place against the Asgardian government. She had grown up behind palace walls on Cyberia, and thus had been blind to the things her family tried to hide from her. She wondered if that’s what it had been like for the people who had been fighting back against the actions of her family.

Lyf’s still talking about the Black Box though. “-and then Ivy fixed it… and that was that. I… I saw the truth. When it was over, I left as quickly as I could. Now I’m here.”

They’re looking down at the metal floor now, and Nastya almost feels bad for asking about their home now. They practically radiated vibes of being homesick. She understood that.

“Yes. You are here now...” She muttered.

They sigh and lay back, looking up at the ceiling. “Nastya, your girlfriend- she’s sentient, right? I mean, I hope that’s okay to ask. I’ve been told that she is such.”

“Aurora is sentient, yes. Why do you ask?”

“I’m admittedly curious. We didn’t have anything like this in the Yggdrasil system, or at least none that I’ve worked with, however brief. I’m curious as to how that works.”

“How Aurora works?”

“Yes. Honestly, I’m trying to focus my mind on something else; anything else. I’m- I’m not having a good night. Let’s leave it at that.”

She nods. Lyf seems genuine in their request, and she can understand wanting something to distract the mind from other thoughts. “I can explain a thing or two.”

* * *

_Tim_

“You want to know if we have what?”

“A crossbow.” Lyf repeats.

Tim eyes them curiously. There _was_ a crossbow among all the other things of the armory, but this was an odd request. A unique one, but he wasn’t expecting Lyf to be the one asking. He didn’t figure them to be a crossbow kind of person.

“May I ask why?” He asks. “You didn’t break your revolver already, did you?”

“No, I didn’t break it. You and the rest of your friends have a tendency of causing trouble wherever you are-”

“What else is new? That’s how we work.”

“My point. I was only barely trained with firearms when I took my initial position with my old job, and I’m more drawn to bows and arrows- I did a bit of archery when I was younger. I’ll keep the revolver you gave me, but I want something besides this to defend myself if we ever get into any trouble while planetside.”

That was a fair point. The last time he had Lyf in this room he was teaching them how to use their revolver, because Jonny had asked him to give Lyf weapons training. Lyf was still mortal as well; it made sense they’d want a few methods of protecting themself. In any case, Tim was the master at arms; he’ll oblige their request.

“There’s a couple. We’ve picked up all sorts of weaponry over the centuries from various adventures.” Tim says as he goes over to one of the cabinets. “Let’s see here…”

He sorts through the weapons in the cabinet until he finds one of the crossbows, picking it up and feeling the weight of it in his hands. He hums in thought before turning back to Lyf.

“This one might work. It’s a nice semi-lightweight model with good handling and very good puncture damage.” He holds it out to Lyf and they carefully take it. “Easily foldable for storage too.”

He watches Lyf examine it. “It does feel nice; not too heavy.”

“Great! Let me get a couple bolts and show you how to use it.”

Tim gets a couple arrows and loads one up in the crossbow, showing Lyf that process as well. Tim’s only used a crossbow on a handful of occasions, but he still knows how they work. He starts by showing Lyf how to holding a crossbow, directing the aim of it towards a wall.

“Slight adjustment on your grip here- yes, there you go. Does that feel comfortable?”

“Yes, it’s fine.” Lyf confirms.

“Good. Try firing it at the wall over there. Be careful of the kickback when you pull the trigger though.”

He sees Lyf take a breath, hunching their shoulders in concentration. They pull the trigger on the crossbow and in a flash, the arrow flies out and hits the wall with a clang. Lyf flinches as it fires, but they stay on their feet.

“Well done!” Tim comments as Lyf lowers the crossbow. “The only other thing I’ll mention is to be mindful about what kind of situation to use this in. It takes longer to prep and fire than a gun. Oh, that gives me an idea now that I think about it.”

“Which is?”

Tim goes looking around through another cabinet and returns to Lyf with a dagger in hand. “We picked this up while in Yggdrasil, before everything went all… you know. I can’t remember what planet we got this from; either Vanaheim or Jotunheim.”

By this point, Lyf has set down the crossbow completely and is looking at the dagger like it’s some precious object.

“In the event you find yourself in a situation that’s too close for comfort, when your crossbow won’t be a viable option and your revolver might not be quick enough, it may be helpful to have something like this on hand.”

Lyf stares at the dagger for a moment, flicks their gaze up to Tim, and then takes it, running their fingers over the silver designs on the hilt.

“It’s- I-” Their gaze flickers up to Tim. “Why are you giving this to me? It’s not like I’m properly one of your crew.”

“For one, now you have ample ways of defending yourself.” Tim reasons. “Plus, it seemed only fitting to give you a dagger from the former Yggdrasil system. I mean, Jonny did ask me to give you weapons training, and not to mention you're still here. You're traveling with us now, so I don't see the harm.”

Lyf continues to study the hilt of the dagger. “I think the design is of a Jotunheim style. I forget that the rest of you were still running Yggdrasil around while Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella were stuck on Midgard. But then again I didn’t know of you all yet.” They pause, giving Tim a curious look. “Do I want to know how you even acquired this dagger if you got it from Jotunheim of all places? They cut off contact with nearly everyone except for Midgard because of Odin.”

Tim grins at them. “Now, you see, that is an interesting story.”

“Does this involve going around guns blazing and/or explosions?”

“But that’s the best part!”

Lyf rolls their eyes at him. “Nope, I’ve decided I don’t want to know.”

“Maybe another time then. Before you go, let me fix up your crossbow real quick. I think there was a slight delay when you fired it.”

They hand over the crossbow and Tim brings it over to one of his work benches so he can set to work.

He can’t remember when exactly this particular crossbow was picked up, but he can tell it hasn’t been used in a while. He makes quick work of cleaning it up and making sure everything is working properly.

It’s one of his favorite things to do. When you’re traveling around in space for extended amounts of time, you need to find something to keep you entertained. For Tim, he found that cleaning his collection of weapons, sometimes disassembling some completely and putting them back together, was a good way to pass the time. The only downside was when people bothered him when he was deep into disassembly and cleaning, but he only got irritated because he didn’t want to be interrupted.

“Do you do this kind of thing a lot in your downtime?” Lyf asks from beside him.

“Hm? Yeah.” He replies. He doesn’t mind Lyf being here, as this is just meant to be a quick once over for the crossbow. “I like to make sure everything I use is working properly, so that requires regular maintenance. It’s kind of grounding, in a way.”

“I see. I can understand having something like that. I guess when you’re out here traveling through space you need to have some kind of hobby.”

“Right! You get it!”

Lyf briefly smiles. Tim doesn’t think he’s seen them smile before. Most times when he’s seen Lyf they look either tired or exasperated; very tired more so these days. Tim was vaguely aware they were working through some stuff, but that was no surprise. Everyone on this ship was fucked up to some degree; he was no exception.

Tim finishes cleaning up the crossbow and hands it back to Lyf. “Here you go! Good as new.”

Lyf takes it back, folds the sides in. “Thanks. I’ll let you know if it ever needs fixing. And… thank you for the dagger.”

“No problem. Ashes or Nastya could probably teach you a few knife tricks if you asked. Daggers and such don’t really work with me, but I keep some in the armory anyway.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

* * *

_Ashes_

It did not escape Ashes’ notice that Lyf was keeping their distance. Ashes may have been previously preoccupied at beating both Tim and Brian at cards, but they still noticed Lyf sat on one of the couches nearby with a notebook they always seemed to be carrying around lately.

In fairness, they’d only been a part of the crew for only a couple weeks, though Ivy has already claimed them as an archival assistant and Nastya had also talked about training them as a bosun. Plus there was talk about integrating Lyf into the band after the new album was done as a celloist. Still, it seemed they were still a bit anxious around others that they did not know too well, aka anyone who was not Marius, Raphaella, or Ivy.

So, since Tim and Brian have both wandered off by this point, Ashes did the only thing that didn’t involve setting something on fire.

“Hey, Lyf.” They called. Lyf looked up from their book. “Fancy a round of cards?”

“You, uh… want me to play cards with you?”

Ashes resisted the urge to roll their eyes. “Yes, you. We won’t bite… or set you on fire in my case.”

Maybe not the best choice of words, judging by their reaction of staring at them for a few minutes. Eventually though, they got up and made their way over to the table, sitting down in the chair across from Ashes.

“So, um, what are we playing?” Lyf asks.

Ashes shrugs. “Whatever comes to mind.”

“Do you know any Yggdrasilian card games?”

Ashes thinks for a moment. “I think I picked one up from Svartalfheim. Oracle.”

“My sister’s wife knew it. Taught me how to play.”

Ashes smiles, and they begin.

They know Oracle, and have tried it out with a few of the crew, but it never really caught on with any of them, save for Ivy. Lyf, as it turns out, is a natural at the game, and proves to be a decent match. They did have a slight advantage, since this was a game from their home, but Ashes is able to keep up.

Also, they know a few tricks.

“Wait one second- you’re cheating.” Lyf claims.

“Don’t know what you mean.”

“I just saw you sneak a card from the discard pile.”

Perceptive one, this former (second class) inspector. “Just trying to keep it interesting for you. Now, if you really wanted interesting, you should have been around for the time we were all playing this game we picked up near a dwarf star. The last time that was played it went on for 10 hours and resulted in at least one murder. Jonny swore I stole the golden loyalty card for a full week.”

Lyf doesn’t look impressed. “Did you?”

“Nope. That one wasn’t me, despite what he said.”

“Great.”

They return to playing the game at hand, and Ashes holds back the tricks, lest Lyf complain again. In the end, it turns out to be a close game, and Lyf manages to blindside them to get the win. Again, they had the advantage. Ashes is satisfied with this none the less; Lyf was a worthy foe and Ashes got them to come out of their shell a little.

“I haven’t played Oracle in a while.” They admit. “Good to know I haven’t forgotten it.” And are they smiling? Just a little? “That was good.”

“Yeah, that was pretty fun.” Ashes agrees. “I’d be up for a rematch sometime.”

“I’ll consdier taking you up on that.”

* * *

_Brian_

Brian wasn’t expecting Lyf, their newest crew member (technically speaking) to wander into the bridge, not that he minded the company. It did get lonely up here sometimes. Someone around here had to be in charge of navigation though, and to assist Nastya with anything she might require regarding Aurora.

“Hello, Lyfrassir!” He greets, cheery. “What brings you to the bridge?”

“No reason. I...” They look around, fidgeting with what appears to be a ring on their right hand. “I’m not sure. What are you up to?”

“Piloting. Running the navigation. The usual.” He answers plainly.

“Oh. I shouldn’t bother you then-”

“You’re not bothering me at all. You can stay if you want. It can get a bit… lonely being here, so I appreciate the company.”

“I… I guess I could stay for a little bit.”

Lyf takes the empty seat next to him, looking out to the stars. They seem to relax after a moment, folding their hands over their lap.

For a while, Lyf says nothing, and Brian’s okay with that. He appreciates Lyf just being here, even if they weren’t saying anything.

“...Can I ask you something?” Lyf asks, breaking the silence.

“Of course.”

“Is it always such a cold and hollow feeling?”

“What is?”

“The loneliness.”

Brian looks away from the navigation displays and over to Lyf, seeing they’re still staring out the front window. Their expression was vacant, like they weren’t really looking at anything in particular. Brian does know a thing or two about being lost and alone; he knows it all too well.

Still- “Why do you ask, Lyfrassir?”

“I… I just...” They sigh, finally turning to him. “You know what happened to my world; you know what I fled from. I went on for days alone until you all found me. I know that here- It’s okay here, I know that, but I still feel like… like I’m-” Lyf cuts themself off; shakes their head. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I haven’t been really to shake that feeling, and I know you all have decided to take me in, but I still feel a bit lost."

“I understand.” Brian says. He does know the story about what happened to Lyf, mostly because of the new album the band was working on. Regardless, Brian knows that Lyf had to leave behind everything and everyone they knew, setting out into the void alone. He can only imagine what all this has done to poor Lyf, not to mention the effects of isolation from traveling alone. It can get terribly lonely and cold in space indeed when you are alone.

(He should know. He was tossed into space and left to die there in its cold embrace.)

“I know what being adrift feels like, though in a different sense.” He continues. “A long time ago, I did something that- let’s just say it had unpleasant consequences. Long story short is I was left alone to die by a place that did not want me. Of course then a certain someone found me and… now here I am; pilot of the Aurora. I do not wish that kind of loneliness on anyone; it’s as slow and deadly as poison. Sometimes I still get that feeling, sometimes if I’ve been up here for a really long time, but I try my best to remember that there are others here; that I’m not alone. You know that’s true for you too, right? You’re certainly not alone, Lyfrassir.”

They seem to relax a little at his words, leaning back against the seat. “I suppose… Things are just- it’s hard for me right now.”

“After what you’ve gone though, that’s fair. You’re safe here. You’ve got us after all.” Lyf makes a noise that almost sounds gives the impression that they’re unsure. “Hey- Marius likes you; he’s very fond of you. I’d say he’s very happy to have you here.”

“Well. T-That’s Mar- Von Raum.” Lyf mutters, the hint of a blush rising to their cheeks.

Of course, Brian is aware of how exactly Marius feels about Lyf. He had made it far too easy to tell when they had left Yggdrasil. He’d even mentioned Lyf offhandedly to Brian one time before they found Lyf again. As for Lyf- that remained to be seen. Brian suspected there might be something there, especially with that reaction

Brian continues on. “Ivy seems happy to have you around, especially with that project you and her have started. Even Nastya has talked about you a couple times. She wants to teach you some stuff about ship repair I think.”

“…What do you think about me being here?”

“Me? I don’t mind at all. You’re an unexpected addition, of course, but not unwelcome.”

Their gaze shifts from side to side, as if they’re trying to avoid making eye contact with him. “Do… Do you mean that?”

“Lyfrassir, I’m on MJE right now. I couldn’t lie to you if I wanted. Not that I intended to; I meant what I said.”

“Hm...”

“Listen; you’ve gone though a lot, I know, and you’re trying to adjust while dealing with all of that. It’s going to take time. Trust me, when I was brought on board it was the same. Some of the crew are easier to warm up to than others. A few are more guarded, like Jonny. I think you’ve already started to find a place among us though, so I believe you’ll do just fine. And if you ever need someone to talk to, about the ‘feeling adrift’ stuff, you can come find me.”

“Okay. Thanks...” They lapse into silence, and after a moment switch topics. “Um, I’ve heard that term before; MJE. What exactly does that mean?”

“That. It’s just for my morality switch.” He replies.

“Your… what?” Lyf questions. “Wait, I thought the switch thing was a joke- they were all being serious about that?”

“Unfortunately. MJE is short for my Means Justify Ends setting, which is what I’m on right now. EJM stands for Ends Justify Means, and… well… that Brian isn’t as pleasant.”

Lyf blinks owlishly at him before finally saying, “That’s fucked up.”

“You’re telling me.”

* * *

_Ivy_

The library was Ivy’s domain, and normally, it would just be herself here. Sometimes Raphaella would join her. She’d extended the offer to Lyf when she had decided to make them her assistant, and soon they had established themself as a regular presence. Ivy didn’t mind it, not really. Lyf was fine company, and they were a great assistant.

One morning after breakfast, she goes to the library intending to sort some more materials from Yggdrasil. There are a few books on one of the desks she finished reading last night but forgot to put away, so she might as well do that now. It’s as she’s returning a book to one of its shelves, she finds Lyf in the library’s small nook; sitting in front of the fake fireplace. They had a blanket around their shoulders and appeared to have a block of wood in their hands, craving something into it.

“Edda?” She called, hoping it didn’t startle them too much.

They pause in their carving and look over their shoulder at her. “Good morning, Ivy.”

She smiles gently at them and steps forward. “Good morning, Edda. We missed you at breakfast. What is it you’re up to here?”

“Oh, it’s nothing. I… I realized it was Yule today.”

“Yule?” She repeats.

“Yes. It’s- It _was_ a holiday back home. You see, my family would carve runes into the Yule Log as a wish to the Gods for protection in the coming seasons. Normally, my family would use a fir tree, but there’s none of that here obviously. Toy Soldier had some scrap pieces of wood lying around, so- i-it’s not the same, but I… I...”

Their expression has gradually turned downcast and their words have trailed off. They’re just staring down at the cube in their hand, rubbing a thumb slowly over the surface. Ivy can see now that there’s some carvings on the surface of it; runes she recognizes as Yggdrasilian (Midgard variant).

Ivy sees what’s going on; it’s not too hard to put together the pieces. Lyf’s still trying to keep their culture alive when it’s all been swallowed by the Bifrost, only books and relics remaining. They’re still trying, even if the act of remembering hurts. Maybe they’re doing it because they don’t want to forget. Ivy can understand that; she’s forgotten things too, things she can’t get back.

So she kneels down next to them and, gently, she asks, “Can you tell me more about Yule?”

They look up, and she thinks there’s a brighter shine to their eyes. “Y… Yes. Of course. Officially, Yule lasts for twelve days, beginning on the winter solstice. According to the ship’s calendars, today would be the start of Yule. I didn't realize when I left Yggdrasil that it was so close to Yule. ”

Ivy listens patiently as Lyf explains more about Yule. She has somewhat of an idea already of some of the customs associated with it- she was in a prison on Midgard for 60 years; it didn’t escape her notice when some of the guards or cops would speak of Yule. Still, for Lyf’s sake, she listens and nods along as if she’s just learning this for the first time. Lyf goes on about different things done during the days of Yule, things they would do with their family, and she can see that they seem to be slightly happier now. Perhaps sharing bits of their culture with her is helping, and she makes a metal note to consult some materials in the Yggdrasil collection so she can catalog this holiday. This will be beneficial to their project as well.

“I will have to make a note of Yggdrasilian holidays for our project.” Ivy tells them when they explain the bulk of it.

“We had quite a few holidays in the year cycle, Yule was often seen as our most important, but there were others. Ostra, Midsummer- there’s one in the fall… I...” Their brow furrows as they try to place it. “-Lammas! That’s right! That’s….” They stop speaking again and confusion crosses their face. “...I forgot. No, I… I shouldn’t have forgotten that. Why did I…?”

Ivy can see them start to spiral as they question why it had slipped their mind. She knows because she’s been there.

She reaches out and sets a hand on their forearm. “Edda.”

Lyf meets her eyes. They look unsure. “Everything is gone, Ivy. It’s all gone and I’m the only one left who remembers anything at all. I can’t… I can’t let myself forget. I can’t forget all the pieces that I can remember. I need to remember.”

She nods. “I know, but that’s why we’re doing your project, remember? We’re doing this so something is remembered. Also, if it helps, I have problems with my memory too. Every so often my brain will have to do a reboot.”

“It does what now?”

“Long story. Point is, I understand agonizing over things you’ve forgotten but you’re so desperately trying to hold onto. It’s not pleasant at all, even if it's just a momentary gap in memory. I have my library here with everything I could ever want to know, but memories are a precious thing. And our traumas- they’ll never make it easy for us. We just have to do our best.”

They sigh, tossing the cube back and forth in their hands. “I’m sorry you forget things.”

“I’ve had a long time to adjust. I still hate it, but I’ve learned to live with it.” She looks to the cube. “Can I carve something on that too?”

They hesitate, but hand it over, also giving her what appeared to be a pocket knife. “I’d like that.”

Lyf shows her some examples of runes they know and she picks one to carve into the wood. She can recognize what it is, but she’s never written out a rune (or craved in this case), so it’s a bit of a crude representation.

“How’s this?” She asks.

“It’s prefect.” Lyf says, a smile pulling at the corners of their lips. “Thank you for adding to it, Ivy.”

“Thank you for telling me about Yule. Now I’m more informed about it. And don’t worry, I’ll make sure this has its place in our project, along with any other customs you see fit.”

“Speaking of which, I’ll get on that as soon as I finish putting a couple more runes in.”

She pats their shoulder before standing up. “I’ll make us both some tea in the meantime.”

* * *

_Raphaella_

“What is it you’re working on again?”

“I told you it’s for Ivy.” Raphaella states. “And I merely asked you for advice on the colors.”

Lyf purses their lips, looks over the item, and then gives an answer. “Gold’s always a good choice if you’re using Navy for your base. Have the gold be the trimming around the edges and have the heart embroidered in the center. Make it a nice red, but not too bright; more subdued.”

“Wonderful!” She beams. “Thank you for your input! You’re so good with color.”

“You’re welcome. I think when my eyes changed color my, ah, perception on color might have been enhanced?” They quickly changed track, probably to avoid her asking more questions. “Anyway- I think it’s nice you’re making something for Ivy.”

She continues to smile at them in appreciation. She had been working on a new bookmark for Ivy (a science themed bookmark of course) when Lyf dropped by. Raphaella had taken after to asking about their eyes again; if she could run a couple tests on them to see if she could determine the sudden shift in color. She had a theory it was due to however much of the Bifrost they were liekly exposed to, but she wasn’t sure. Of course Lyf, turned down the request, and then they had noticed the bookmark she was working on.

“I’ve made her things before; many times! I often make her bookmarks she can use for the most part. She’ll use them a lot and they get worn out, so I’m more than happy to make her more.”

“That explains all the bookmarks she keeps around.”

Raphaella’s wings flutter, pleased by knowing Ivy still has some of the ones she’s made. “I’ve also helped her set up the book organizing system she uses. Oh, I also once made her a concoction that was, in retrospect, a tiny bit over caffeinated. Long story short, the reaction was… unexpected and made her a bit hyper. It eventually overwhelmed her.”

Lyf is now eyeing her dubiously. “Was she okay?”

“She was fine. I found her passed out in the library. Sort of like when you had to go to the hospital because you had so much caffeine in you, plus the obvious signs of a lack of sleep when you came to see us. You really worried Marius with that one.”

They roll their eyes, “Don’t remind me. The rest of the office never let me live that one down.”

“Anyway, even if it had been worse, her mechanism would have repaired the damage and healed her, so she would have been fine in the end! Still kinda feel bad for making it a bit stronger than she could handle though.”

“Hm… Raphaella?”

“Yes?”

“How does that work exactly? The whole... mechanism thing. I know you all cannot die, but I’m not quite sure I completely understand it.”

Raphaella had known from when she first met Lyf that they were skeptical about any claims to immortality. It wasn’t until they witnessed an instance of it their first morning aboard that they seemed to finally believe it.

Now, for Raphaella- she had studied the science of her mechanization thoroughly, and her resulting immortality. She had her own less then pleasant memories of a certain doctor, but she had taken that person’s technology and perfected it for herself. Other members of the crew were not keen on discussing their mechanisms or Carmilla, but Raphaella was okay with talking about it; at least the scientific parts.

“Come sit.” She requests, gesturing to the empty chair next to her. She waits for Lyf to sit down before going further. “Okay, so- Our immortality? Each one of has a device called a mechanism that makes us unable to die. Some are easier to tell than others. Mine, for example, are my wings. These devices can heal us from any injury, even fatal ones. In the event that we die, as you’ve already seen, they still heal our wounds and restore us from death. We also cannot age as a side effect of our mechanisms. So basically, our bodies still operate as normal, but our healing is rather advanced and death is only temporary.”

“I think I understand the idea. I imagine you weren’t always like this though?”

“No. We-” She pauses, formulating how to best word this. “Most of us don’t like to talk about it. The process behind our mechanization. It was more painful for some of us. I don’t really like to talk about it much either; just the scientific portions.”

“I… I see… Sorry for asking.” They say.

“No worries, Lyf. You didn’t do anything wrong. Our immortality is just a touchy subject for most of us.”

“From the sounds of it, yes. But at the same time I feel honored you would trust me enough to let me know about yours. I didn’t think your wings were- did… did you used to have wings before your mechanization?”

“Yes! I was born with wings! There was an accident a long time ago, and, well… You can probably guess the rest.”

“I suppose so.” Their gaze seems to drift away from her, and then- “Um, I think there’s an octokitten chewing on your bookmark for Ivy.”

Raphaella turns- there is indeed an octokitten doing such. Must’ve snuck in here.

“Hey! Away with you!” She exclaims as she tries to shoo it away.

Lyf comes over and carefully pries the bookmark from the octokitten, then taking the pesky thing into their arms. She is slightly surprised by the ease at which they handled the octokitten, and they too notice her observing gaze.

“I had a cat back on Midgard.” They say, plainly.

It bleeps at them and bats them with a tentacle. Lyf sighs and leaves the lab with the octokitten.

* * *

_Aurora_

She knew there had been someone new living aboard for a couple weeks now. She could sense their presence, just as she could sense everyone else that lived within her confines. Aurora doesn’t know too much about the newcomer, just small details mostly relayed by Nastya and observations Aurora herself has made.

Their name is Lyfrassir Edda (or Lyf for short. Everyone called them some varying degree of their name). They are from the (formerly existing) Yggdrasil system. They were the central narrator of the crew’s newest album (played by Jonny- no surprise). Lyf seemed a bit timid around the rest of the crew, save for Ivy, Raphaella, and Marius (especially Marius), but they seemed to be warming up to Nastya and Brian recently. They seemed to keep to themselves a lot of the time or could be found in the library, though they did appear to join the rest of the crew for regular meals.

Nastya had told Aurora, upon further questioning, that Lyf was the sole survivor of a great calamity that destroyed their home, their entire star system, and left them quite traumatized to say the least. How terrible that must be.

But Lyf was here now; they were safe. Aurora hoped that this poor soul would find peace, but in the meantime, they were more than welcome to call her home.

At present, Aurora watches as Nastya talks to Lyf about something. She knows Nastya has been thinking about training them as a bosun, and Aurora quite likes the idea. Nastya was a skilled engineer, and had taken care of Aurora for all these many, many years (sometimes alongside Brian, who filled in for Nastya during her absence), but sometimes Nastya worked too hard and to long and it worried Aurora. It would be good to have another person to help Nastya with repairs and such.

The two are still talking but eventually, Nastya hands Lyf a couple tools and she instructs them on repairing some nearby paneling.

In the past, the only ones who had ever bothered with doing any repairs or maintenance of any sort were Nastya and Brian. Aurora could recognize their touch as they worked; Nastya loving and methodical, and Brian ever careful and consulting. Aurora knew them. When Nastya had left for nearly a century, Biran had tried to fill Nastya’s role, but a few others had tried and Aurora was not used to that. Brian she could tolerate, but she outside of that she wasn’t used to anyone’s touch but Nastya. Nastya had of course come back, and now Lyf was here.

Lyf’s touch, as they worked on the paneling, was new; hesitant and cautious. Slow and mindful. They looked slightly unsure of themselves. Maybe nervous. In a moment where they appeared to second guess themselves, Aurora relayed a message to Nastya to translate for Lyf.

“You are doing fine.”

Aurora watched as Lyf looked from Nastya to the console where Aurora was observing them. Lyf gave the faintest hint of a smile, nodded, and returned to work.

She trusted Nastya to teach them properly. Aurora would get used to this newcomer; bosun in training. They were mindful enough, and to her, that showed they cared.

* * *

_Toy Soldier_

Toy Soldier was quite excited to have a new crew member. It wasn’t too often that there were guests aboard the Aurora, much less any new friends to join the crew on their travels!

It doesn’t know Lyf too well, not like Marius, Ivy, and Raphaella do. It went around with the crew for the first 20 years, joining in on their fun. Toy Soldier joined a dancing troupe in Alfheim for a decade or so after those three had been caught and imprisoned in Midgard’s capital city.

Speaking of which, Ivy had uncovered something in that time about a train that had disappeared. Shortly after, she, Raphaella, and Marius had been captured, which Jonny thought was funny. They just didn’t hide well enough and got themselves caught! But they’d be fine; they would return to eventually. Also because Raphaella and Ivy worked out the train would reappear in 6 decades or so, and it wasn’t going to be pretty when it did. Jonny agreed to pick them up when that occurred, both because messing with things beyond reality was always tricky, and he wanted to see how the story would unfold.

And what an exciting and tragic tale it was! The events were going to be the basis for their next story, which was just as exciting!

Now look what had happened! In the short span of a week since leaving Midgard and the Yggdrasil system behind to its unfortunate end, they’d gained a new crew member, and not just anyone- Former Inspector Second Class Lyfrassir Edda! What a fantastic turn of events this was!

Yet, Toy Soldier does feel bad for the poor fellow. Their home, their entire star system, was destroyed by the Bifrost! How terrible indeed.

Today, Toy Soldier finds Lyf with a few of the octokittens. It’s seen Lyf with the little critters before, and if it remembers right, Lyf had adopted one. It didn’t remember what they had named the octokitten though.

“Hello, Lyfrassir!” It greeted.

They glanced up from where they had set a bowl of water on the floor. “Hello, Toy Soldier.”

“Are You Feeding The Octokittens?”

“Yes, and setting out some fresh water for them, per Tim’s instructions.” A tortoiseshell octokitten on Lyf’s shoulder meows they pats the creature’s head. “Go on now, Sigrid.”

The octokitten oozes off of Lyf’s shoulder, down their arm, and over to the water bowl.

“Is That The Octokitten You Adopted?”

They nod and stand. “Sigrid; named after the cat I had on Midgard. This one’s been following me around since the morning it fell out of the vents and onto me, so I’m guessing it likes me for some reason?”

“That’s Very Adorable.” Toy Solder comments. “And The Octokittens Do Appear To Like You! They’re Probably Happy To Have A New Friend.”

“They certainly gave me a fright when I first encountered them. That and Von Raum claims one tried to eat him.”

“Oh, That Has Happened. They Act So Strange Sometimes.”

Lyf glances to the octokittens, one of which has now curled its appendages around Lyf’s ankle, then back to Toy Soldier. “...Perhaps someone forgot to feed them. From what I know, there’s quite a lot across the ship.”

“There Is A Lot! Some Of Them Once Carried Ivy To One Of The Storage Bays.”

“What? How did- nevermind. Probably best I don’t know.” They reach down and gently pry the octokitten from their ankle. “What, um, are you up to?”

“Asking Some Of The Others If They Would Like To Join In An Afternoon Tea Party.”

“A… tea party?”

“Yes! Would You Like To Take Part, Lyfrassir?”

They look as if they’re internally debating this, fidgeting with a ring on their finger as they do so. Finally, they say “...You know what- sure.”

Toy Solder is always smiling, but it tries to convey the expression of an even brighter smile. “Jolly Good!”

In the end, it’s only able to get Lyf to join in for the tea party, as everyone else is busy or otherwise. Still, it’s happy Lyf will be there at least.

They set up in one of the rooms where Toy Soldier does a lot of its carvings and sculptures; a small table there with little dishes, biscuits, and freshly brewed tea. Lyf comments on the various sculptures while they have their tea, and it’s more than happy to explain the creative process behind some of them. It’s happy Lyf likes its work.

Lyf, as it turns out, doesn’t do anything like sculpture or carving (unless it’s Yule in regards to the latter or some other Yggdrasilian holiday), but they do write poetry. They also used to draw and play cello.

“You Could Be Part Of Our Band!” Toy Soldier comments.

“Hm.” Lyf hums in response, taking a sip of their tea.

“Oh, Also- If You Take Up Drawing Again, I’d Be Interested In Seeing Some Of Your Work.”

Lyf seems surprised. “You would?”

“Of Course!”

There’s a quick flash of a smile, but they hide it behind their teacup.

* * *

_Jonny_

It’s a quiet evening, and a boring one at that. He hasn’t really seen anyone he could annoy, so he takes this chance to grab a bottle of whiskey and head over to the common room. He doesn’t see anyone there, but regardless, he sits down in the middle of the floor, and after taking a swig of whiskey, he takes out his harmonica.

He’s through a third song and half the bottle when a voice interrupts him.

“What are you doing?”

He sets down the harmonica and looks at who’s behind him. It’s just Lyf; holding a book and looking slightly irritated.

“What does it look like?” He snarks. “Having a drink and playing a song.”

Jonny takes another drink from the bottle for dramatic effect and then picks up the harmonica again. He’s about to play a note into it when he notices Lyf is suddenly standing by his side.

He raises a brow at the newest member of the crew. “What?”

Lyf says nothing, instead holding out the book to him.

“Here.” They say in a clipped tone.

“And this is?”

They look like they want to hit something. “This- This is a transcript of my investigation into the Ratatosk Express and subsequent discovery of what happened in the Bifrost, or at least the recordings. If you’re going to make an album about the destruction of my star system, you’re going to do it right. Not that I’m happy you’re planning on turning my trauma into a musical, but at least someone will know what happened besides me.”

Oh, right. That. Yes, the new album was going to be about the Bifrost- (“no we’re not calling it “all aboard the viking space train” shut up, Tim”)- and Lyf’s investigation. Ivy had grabbed the former inspector’s tapes before leaving the planet, but they were partially corrupted, so most of their material came from what could be restored.

Jonny gets to his feet, slightly annoyed for some reason that Lyf was around the same height as him.

“It would be useful in helping us fill in some of the gaps we can’t get from your tapes.” Jonny says as he takes the book.

“Good. Make sure you use it properly.”

They say this, but now that Jonny looks them over properly, he sees the dark shadows under their silver eyes, how they seem unfocused, and the messy bun their hair has been tossed into. They kinda look like they’re going to fall asleep on their feet.

“And now I’m going to bed.”

And with that, Lyf turns… and promptly passes out.

Their body hits the carpet with a thud, and Jonny stares at them for a moment.

“Ah, shit.” He grumbles.

He’s not… really sure what to do about Lyf. His first instinct is to just leave them passed out on the floor and go back to playing harmonica. Then again he could always put them up on one of the couches or put them in the medbay. But if he did either, he should probably make sure they’re alive first, or else certain people were gonna get mad at him. Oh the joys of adopting a mortal stray.

So, Jonny kneels down, rolls Lyf over onto their back, and pokes them in the forehead.

“Hey, Lyf, you alive there?”

Their faces scrunches up, and they make noise of discomfort. Jonny chooses to ignore this in favor of poking their head some more.

“Come on, up with you. Marius will be pissed if I let you sleep on the floor.” He tries again.

This time Lyf’s eyes crack open and for the briefest of moments, he thought the saw rainbows shimmer in their eyes.

“Leave me alone.” They mutter, sounding weighed down by exhaustion. “You have my story. It’s told now.”

“Yes; _This_ story you gave to me has long since been over. Your escape was an epilogue. As for _you_ \- well, you’re still alive, aren’t you? You still feel that heart of yours beating in your chest? That’s how I know I’m alive, though this stupid thing is why I’m still here in the first place. We’re both stuck here; our stories still being told, whether we like it or not.”

Lyf says nothing, just closes their eyes again and lets their head lull to one side.

Jonny frowns at this and sets his harmonica off to the side. He picks Lyf up, slings them over his shoulder, and carries them over to one of the couches.

“You wanna know something, Lyf?” He says as he deposits Lyf down onto the couch. “It is a truth, often forgotten, that the end is ever rarely the end. Tyrants may fall, and galaxies may burn, and life goes on. We have a story that starts like that.” He retrieves his harmonica and plays a note on it.

He looks back to Lyf, but sees they’re fast asleep on the couch. Jonny regards them for a moment, grabs the book and whiskey, and leaves the common room.

* * *

_Marius_

“What are you making?”

The sudden voice makes him jump a bit, but when he whirls around he sees it’s only Lyf standing in the doorway to the kitchen.

“Christ, Lyf! You’re so quiet.”

“Yeah, I’m secretly a ghost.” They sarcastically retort, walking over to him. “I just came to get something to drink but I maintain my previous question. What are you making?”

Marius smiles at them. “I’m making tiramisu for the crew tonight!”

“Tir… Tiramisu.” They repeat, slowly as if trying out how the word sounded on their lips.

Then again, maybe they’re just really, really tired. Lyf’s been looking more exhausted lately; more weary. Marius doesn’t know if it’s the usual sleep problems they’ve been having or something else, but it worries him. He wonders how long it’s been since Lyf last slept; he heard from Jonny they passed out in the common room last night.

Instead of voicing his concern though, Marius asks, “Why, Lyfrassir- have you never had tiramisu? Was that a thing on your planet?”

“Not that I can immediately recall, though it sounds like something someone like me would have rarely had. Sounds more like some fancy Asgardian dish.”

He gasps dramatically. “We’ll just have to fix that! Come here- you can help me out.”

“Oh, no; that’s not necessary. I’m not the best-”

But Marius has already set his things aside and goes to take Lyf by the arm, dragging them over to the counter.

He’d been in the middle of making up the desert when Lyf had come in, but he remembers where he left of and was easily able to get back into the rhythm of things. He has enough ingredients available to instruct Lyf on making a small tiramisu dish for themselves and then returns to the one he’s making for the crew. As he works, he hums a song, a happy cheery one that hopefully Lyf might like. And hopefully Lyf will like this dish (though it will still need to be chilled in the fridge for a bit once done).

“This looks very sweet.” Lyf comments when Marius is done mixing up the whip.

“It is!” He replies. “It’s made with espresso, which I think will be to your liking, and there’s a dash of rum in it too.”

“I mean, it does sound appealing...”

He’s still got the whisk in hand, so, in a moment of feeling mischievous, he reaches over and lightly taps Lyf’s nose with it, leaving some whip there.

“What the Hel was that for, von Raum?!” Lyf exclaims.

He shrugs. “Kinda felt like it.”

And there’s that lovely annoyed pout of theirs. “I will spill this tiramisu on the floor.”

“Okay, okay; sorry about that. I was just trying to have a little fun. When was the last time you had any fun while cooking?”

“Cooking was never my strong suit.”

“No? Well… To be fair, I always just assumed you survived off coffee and spite alone.”

“Von Raum.”

He grins at Lyf. He missed this; he really did.

“Okay, so we’ll just put these in the fridge for now.” He takes the prepped dishes of tiramisu and does just that. “Let me make you up some tea for the whole getting-whip-on-your-nose thing; you look like you could use some.”

Lyf takes to cleaning some of the dishes while Marius makes up the tea; some nice relaxing chamomile. He helps them out while the water boils, but makes sure to grab a mug for the tea when it’s ready.

“Here you go.” Marius says, handing the mug off to Lyf.

As he does, their hands brush; both grasped on the mug. They freeze, staring at each other for a moment. Marius thinks they see a blush rise to their face, but they quickly take the mug and turn away.

“Thanks.” They mutter, quickly retreating from the kitchen.

“D- Don’t forget your tiramisu later!” Marius calls after them. “I think you’ll like it!”

Knowing they won’t be returning likely until dinner, he sighs, returning to cleaning whatever dishes were left. He does find a message from Lyf on his phone afterward though, thanking him for showing them how to make the tiramisu. It makes Marius smile.

(He also gets another message later on, saying that the tiramisu was delicious)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next update will be moving into the second half of this fic!
> 
> I have no set update schedule, so the best I can say is that I will have the next chapter up as soon as I can <3


	6. Unfolding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Strange things start happening to Lyf...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moving into the second half of this fic now :3  
> Fun fact: I've been working on this fic since March, so about for however long /this/ -*gestures to the obvious awful thing*- has been going on
> 
> (Just a quick heads up for some existential thoughts/ramblings on Lyf's part, as well as a slight breakdown from certain revelations)

Lyf wakes; weary, despite not having any nightmares that night. They’d like to chalk it up to not being fully used to this place yet or traveling with space pirates, despite the fact they’ve been doing so for nearly two months. They feel slightly off, but they’ve just been so tired lately.

To be fair, they’ve been going back and forth with working with Ivy in the archives, working with Nastya (who’s recently given them the title of bosun), and dealing with the stress of living with the Mechanisms. All of that is- it’s a lot. And certainly working on making a transcript of the Black Box recordings for a week straight didn’t help any.

Viewing those recordings dragged up everything they’d been trying to forget, and it took a bit out of them every time. But they wanted to do this, so that the story of what happened to Yggdrasil would be told as accurately as possible. They’d at least given the transcript to Jonny so that he and the others could make use of it, though they don’t remember much from that night. They’d apparently fallen asleep in the common room which- yeah, no surprise. They’d been running on a couple hours of sleep by that point.

And it certainly doesn’t help that they’ve been hearing static more and more after they wake from a nightmare, or see a flash of color out of the corner of their eye on the occasion. They assume this is just how their mind chooses to process that trauma though and looking back into the Black Box made it worse; stupid Bifrost. They knew a few of the others (notably Marius) had taken notice of their state, but it was fine. Everything was fine.

Lyf sits up in bed with a yawn, looking over at the table clock that sat on their nightstand. Still a couple hours before anyone was really up. That was fine; they could just stay here until someone came calling them for breakfast. At least they’re not waking up to any singing.

Speaking of breakfast, if they recall right, it should be Marius who’s making breakfast today, and Lyf can’t help but think back to the other day when they wandered into the kitchen to find him making tiramisu. He had shown them how to make the dish for themself, and while Lyf can handle cooking stuff, they’re not the best at it, especially with something they’ve never tried before. They appreciated his efforts, and, really, it hadn’t been that bad, even when Marius tapped their nose with a whisk still with whip on it.

Lyf smiles to themself. The tiramisu had been delicious, nothing they’ve really had before, and Marius- they’ve been spending more time with him, and it… hasn’t been terrible. He’s admittedly good company when he wasn’t trying to play violin at them or annoying them like he had in prison. They… look forward to it now, time with him, and it makes them feel... hm.

They still haven’t figured out what to do about the whole “might have feelings for the space pirate that used to annoy me with violin music” thing, but they’re not going to try and figure it out now first thing in the morning. They’ll just shove it aside for now and get back to it… sometime.

They get out of bed, grabbing their hair brush and a couple clasps for their hair. Though they’re still working though some things, namely their Bifrost-induced trauma, they’ve been doing a bit better than they were when they were drifting alone in space. They also, for the first time in a while, feel the need to put a braid or two in their hair today. Nothing fancy, just something small. They’ve only recently started doing a sleeping braid again. Perhaps this is progress. Small steps.

Lyf looks into the mirror that hangs on one of the walls of their room as they undo their sleeping braid, intending to comb through it and do up a couple plain braids for the day…

...And as soon as they do, as soon as they see their reflection, they scream.

* * *

Marius was sleeping soundly until an alarm jolted him from his sleep. Well, not so much of an alarm than a constant chirping noise. He grumbles incoherently as he rolls over and pulls his pillow over his head.

“Aurora, what the hell?” He mutters, hoping being annoyed will get the noise to stop.

It does stop and Marius removes the pillow, sitting up just as a screen drops down from the ceiling. He scowls at it as a translated message from Aurora appears.

 **{AUR:** Good. You’re awake. **}** She says to him.

“Why? It’s not-” He reaches for his phone to check the time. Still early. “It’s not even time for breakfast!”

 **{** **AUR:** I’ve detected a strange energy signature; from the interior of the ship.}

His first thought was that Raphaella was preforming an experiment at some ungodly hour, _again_. But that didn’t really explain why Aurora was telling him specifically. Sure, him and Raphaella were reasonably good friends, but still.

He was starting to get a bad feeling about this; where this conversation was heading. “Where, Aurora? And why wake _me_ up?”

 **{** **AUR:** It came from Lyfrassir’s room. **}**

Shit.

“Lyf?” He quickly gets up from bed, suddenly feeling more awake.

 **{AUR:** Yes. May I suggest you check in on them? **}**

“Does anyone else know?”

 **{AUR:** No; everyone is asleep. I haven’t told Nastya either; she’s still sleeping. I decided to tell you because while I don’t know what exactly has caused this energy signature to show up on my sensors, you and Lyfrassir seem rather close. **}**

He looks away from her screen at the implication (he knows there’s still a betting pool going on regarding him and Lyf).“Okay, okay, I’ll go over. Maybe they had a nightmare.”

He says this, but he’s getting the feeling that there’s something else going on. He knew when Lyf came aboard there was a chance they had been affected by the Bifrost. Ivy put it at 35% but after their eyes went silver- yeah, no; they didn’t get out of Yggdrasil untouched by that cosmic chaos on some level. He was aware of that, though half the time he ignored that because, well, as far as he knew Lyf was still okay (or about as okay as they could be between their grief and trauma and everything else).

But Lyf has been acting a bit more odd lately; looking way more out of it than usual. He knew they had trouble sleeping, though Marius suspected there was more than they were letting on. Sometimes Lyf would space out if they started thinking about the investigation for too long, and sometimes Marius could swear he saw a refraction of color in the silver of their eyes.

And when Aurora said “strange energy signature”...

Marius gets over to Lyf’s room as fast as he can, but pauses at the door, wondering how he should approach this. Finally, he settles on just knocking on their door, trying to be as calm and casual as he can.

“Morning, Former Inspector~” He calls. “Wanna come help me with breakfast? It’s french toast today!”

There’s no answer. He tries again.

“Lyf? You alive in there? Come on, I know you went to bed early last night, but I also know you didn’t eat anything for dinner. This will help; promise! Are you not feeling well? You can tell me if you’re not; I _am_ this ship’s resident medic.”

Still no response, not even a snarky remark of “no, I don’t believe you are a doctor of any sort, von Raum”, and maybe he should just leave this alone, but what Aurora said is still bothering him. It worries him.

A screen pops out from the wall. **{AUR:** In case you are wondering- no, they are not asleep. They are awake and have not left their room. It seems something’s upset them. **}**

Okay, yeah, something’s wrong.

Marius runs a hand through his hair. “Right. Thanks, Aurora.” He tries the door handle, and finds it unlocked. “Hey, Lyf, I’m coming in, okay?”

He slowly opens the door, finding the room inside dark. Well, dark except for some kind of glow.

Taking a look around, he see’s Lyf; sitting on the floor against their bed with their knees drawn to their chest.He can’t see their face because its hidden from view, and also because their practically covered by their blanket. He can’t even see their hair. What he does see, however, is a faint rainbow glow that surrounds their form; gently pulsing off them and appearing to slightly warp the space around them; like heatwaves on a road.

Marius also hears them crying, and damn does that make his heart ache.

“Uh, Lyf?” He tries, taking a cautious step forward. “Lyf, it’s me; just Marius. You know, the person you keep confiscating violins from?”

Lyf flinches, tries to curl in on themself more. They mutter something but he can’t fully make it out. He finds the lamp on their nightstand and turns it on, bathing the room in a dim light. He then kneels down in front of Lyf.

“Go a-away, von Ra-Raum.” Comes their voice again, more audible this time. “Why- Why are you-”

“Just checking in on you. Thought you’d like to help me with breakfast.” He doesn’t say Aurora woke him up because she sensed something weird coming from this room and that something was probably Lyf. “What’s the matter? You have a bad dream or something?”

He tries to reach a hand out, but the instant he touches them they shudder and he draws his hand back.

“N-No.” The sound is low and sounding slightly pained.

“Are you hurt? Sick?” He asks, tone gentler. “I can take a look at you-”

“Don’t.” Lyf says, still hiding their face. “I-I- I’m a fucking m-mess. It’s all wr-wrong.”

“It’s okay.” He assures them. “I wanted to make sure you’re alright, and, well, clearly you’re not. I might not be the greatest at this, but I wanna help you if I can.”

The warping aura around Lyf begins to dissipate and they finally look up at him. They’ve been crying, that much is clear, but the tears still in their eyes shimmer dimmly in the light. Their eyes too almost look like they are glowing, like a distant star. There’s something terribly fragile about seeing them like this.

“There you are.” Marius tries, putting on a smile for them. “Let’s get you untangled from this blanket too, hm? You’ll be able to breathe easier without it smothering you.”

“Marius, wait-”

He doesn’t register Lyf’s words fast enough (or that, hey, they actually used his first name for once!), as he’s already removing the blanket from off their head first. The second he pulls it down though his smile falls and he drops the fabric in surprise.

Lyf’s hair is dyed with rainbow; splashed through their bangs and down into the portions of their hair that tumble down over their shoulders. Their hair was definitely not like that yesterday, unless someone’s pranked them while they slept. It’s almost like this was something that happened suddenly and overnight and they’re just noticing it now, like when their eyes turned silver.

It’s… It’s rather pretty; the colors contrasting against their natural hair color. And yet some part of Marius knows exactly what has done this; the same riot of color that hailed the destruction of Yggdrasil. He can’t help but stare, entranced.

Lyf doesn’t take his reaction very well. In the same moment Marius is taking all of this in, Lyf tries to back away further, but they’ve got nowhere to go. They accidentally hit the back of their head off the bed and they cry out, curling up on themself once again. Marius winces, not having meant to make them want to hide away.

“Sorry, I should have asked before I did that. Did someone sneak in here and dye your hair while you were sleeping?”

There’s nothing for a moment, but then Marius hears a low chuckle, one that quickly rises to a hysterical pitch.

“Y-You know what? I almost w-wish that was it.” Lyf’s voice cracks as they speak.

He doesn’t know if he should try to move forward, so he stays put for now. “...Your hair wasn’t like that last night.”

“No… no of c-course it… it wasn’t. I didn’t- I didn’t know- I-I just looked in the mirror, and I find my hair’s gone fucking rainbow!”

He carefully inches forward. “So it’s like what happened to your eyes?”

“...It’s not just my eyes. Or my hair. There’s- fuck, there’s something- it’s n-not just th-that.”

By this point, Lyf sounds like they’re borderline hyperventilating, and that aura is still faint, but present, around them. Marius moves so he’s sitting next to Lyf, hoping to provide a grounding presence. “What do you mean by that?”

“How can you not see?” Their head snaps up, and- Oh shit, there’s rainbow shadowed under their eyes, and he can see what looks like to be a web of rainbow creeping up their neck. How did he not notice that? “It’s more than that.”

The aura around them seems to darken, but shimmers like light on oil. It’s like it’s reacting to Lyf’s emotions. The bedside lamp flickers once.

“Whoa, Lyf-”

“I should have known when my eyes changed color, but I didn’t- something in me is _wrong_. I can hear its song. I can hear the static. I hear their screams in my nightmares. I was stupid to think that I could get out without it following me. Gods, I was so stupid!”

The aura flares and the light from the lamp flickers violently (though it does not shatter). They make a pained sound and Marius can see rainbow streaks appearing on their hands. At that point, as Lyf begins to shake, Marius takes them into his arms and holds them to his chest. He feels Lyf tense, but they don’t try and get away.

“It’s okay.” He says in a hushed tone. “It’s okay, Lyf. You’re safe here.”

They’re simple words, but it’s all he can think to say. He hears a sob escape Lyf, and he runs a hand slowly up and down their back as they curl a hand into his shirt in return. He’s not entirely sure what to do, what to say- Except make sure they’re okay. Make sure they have someone. Make sure they know they’re not alone.

After a few minutes, the aura that had been around Lyf changes back to its faint shine, and then fades completely. No more signs of rainbow weirdness. Marius takes this as a sign that maybe they’ve gone through the worst of their meltdown.

“You still with me, Lyf?” He asks.

Lyf doesn’t respond.

“Lyf.” Marius continues. “Hey… I know you’re not okay right now, but can you… can you please say something? Let me know you’re still here? Or just like, tap something out on my arm if that’s better. I don’t know fully what’s going on, but I’m here; I’ve got you.”

At first, Lyf doesn’t say anything, and Marius resigns to waiting patiently for them to find their voice. It’s about as much as he can do at the moment, worried about possibly sending Lyf into further panic. Eventually, they do speak.

“I-I-” Lyf’s voice is shaking. Their silver eyes are brimmed with tears again as they pull back from him. There’s no rainbow on their person anymore either. “I… I need help. Some- Something’s- I’m n-not okay. I’m not- not right. Something’s happening to me...”

Marius nods, reaching out to carefully set a hand against Lyf’s arm. They don’t flinch away this time.

“We can go see Raphaella, if you want.” He offers “She won’t use you for a science experiment; I’ll make sure of it. I know I’m the doctor here but weird stuff like this is a little out of my expertise. Hell, if anyone, she might know what’s going on.”

He knows that Lyf might not be up for that, given how they reacted last time he suggested that (after their eyes went silver), but to his surprise, they consent.

“Okay.” They croak.

Something in Marius twists with how tired Lyf sounded. “Alright, let’s get you up.”

He helps Lyf to their feet, still mostly wrapped up in their blanket, but they sway a little, so Marius comes up with another idea. He scoops Lyf up into his arms- God, they feel nearly as cold as Nastya- and there’s not even a noise of protest, which is also concerning. He’d thought Lyf would have at least some retort to that. In any other case, he’d be happy to have Lyf in his arms, but right now they look shaken up.

35% chance; yeah right.

“We’ll get this sorted, Lyf; don’t you worry.”

* * *

Raphaella is annoyed at first when Marius shows up at the door to her lab first thing in the morning, but that quickly melts away when she sees that Marius is carrying Lyf in his arms; wrapped up in a blanket and hiding their face from her. Also the fact that Lyf’s hair is a mess of rainbows.

Curiosity flashes though her eyes and she ushers them in without a word.

She instructs Marius to set Lyf down in her lab chair and she starts to dig out various equipment. She also sets some water in a kettle to boil (that sits on top of a bunsen burner). While that goes on, Marius temporarily leaves their side to go talk to her.

“Raph, my best immortal friend. Brilliant scientist-” He starts.

“If you’re going to ask me if I know what’s going on with Lyf, I don’t know. Not yet anyway.” She interrupts. “I’m assuming you know about as much as I do?”

Marius looks from her and back to Lyf, you seems to be staring off, lost in their own thoughts, and then back to her. He speaks a bit quieter this time. “Aurora woke me up and said she detected a weird energy signature coming from their room. They looked to be having a mild eldritch breakdown when I found them. Outside of that, yeah, I know about as much as you do. So much for Ivy’s calculations, huh.”

“Yes, though this will be a good opportunity to study the effects of the Bifrost on a living person.”

“Nothing too extreme, Raph? They’re… not having a good time.”

“Calm down, I won’t do anything of the sort to your paramour.” She assures him.

He looks away, trying to hide the red that rises to his cheeks. “I’m here for moral support.”

“Mmhm. Says the one who brought Lyf here in his arms. Oh, I think the water has boiled.”

Raphaella steps away to take the kettle off the burner and pour the hot water into the mug. It only takes a couple minutes after that to steep the tea, and once that is done, she takes it over to Lyf.

“Here.” She says, pressing the cup of tea into their hands. Lyf takes it wordlessly. “Fun fact: this tea is made with seaweed! It’s better than it sounds, really.”

Lyf peers down at the drink, squinting at it momentarily. Raphaella returns to gathering her equipment for analysis.

Marius, meanwhile, watches as Lyf takes a tentative sip of the tea. They make a face for brief second, which is kinda good? It’s certainly an improvement from the startled despairing look they had earlier, or the blank stare they had on the way over here.

“That bad?” He jokes, trying to lighten the mood. That he could do.

“D-Different.” They reply, voice still unsteady.

“I mean she did say it was made with seaweed.”

They make a noise of agreement, but then take another sip. Maybe it’s helping to calm them down. “Will- Can she really- are you sure she’s not going to make me a, ah- a-a science experiment?”

“She’s not gonna, don’t worry. I’ll make sure of it.”

“I heard that!” Raphaella call from where she’s going through some cabinets. “You’re the one who brought them here, Marius. Besides, that wasn’t my intention when Lyf looks so shaken up. I must admit though, I am very curious about how their hair has suddenly started turning into a rainbow.”

“Still here.” They mutter, looking just a tad bit distressed again.

“Feeling any better?” Marius asks

They shake their head. “What do you think? This- This is- You know what it is.”

He does, but doesn’t voice it. “Even if it is, Raph might be able to shine some more light on it. You’re in good hands.”

“Right. She might know… something. Science officer and all. I still remember what kind of reputation you all gained in Yggdrasil, but… I… I trust you.” They look at Marius when they say that, and wow does that make him feel some kind of emotion because he never thought he’d hear Lyf say that to him. Of course, they quickly follow this up with, “I’m _choosing_ to trust you and her, against my better judgment. Not like I have anything else to loose at this point.”

(Lyf says this but Marius is still stuck on how they looked at him; vulnerable and unsure. Perhaps scared because of what they think is really going on, what Marius knows as well, much as he doesn’t want to admit it because he doesn’t want to think about the implications. Marius doesn’t remember ever seeing Lyf like this. He didn’t like it.)

Raphaella comes back to them with a cart of equipment and a notebook in her hands. She’s got a smile on her face, and Marius can tell she’s very interested in making observations on whatever’s going on with Lyf. She had managed to get some data on the Bifrost before they left the Yggdrasil system, which did make her probably the best option for consultation.

“My first guess is this is due to whatever exposure you got from the Bifrost.” She says. “I’m going to attach a few monitors to you, okay?”

“Will we be needing them?”

“Relax, it’s not like I’m going to preform a vivisection on you.” They get a slightly panicked look and she amends, “Sorry, poor choice of words. It’s just to help take some readings and keep an eye on your vitals while I run a few scans and such; nothing that will harm you.”

Lyf nods and Raphaella has them lean back, Marius taking their tea from them and putting it on a tray that would normally hold surgical tools. Raphaella starts to attach nodes to Lyf; one on their head, one on their chest. So on and so on.

“Comfortable?” She asks once she’s done.

“As I’ll ever be.” They respond.

“You want your tea?” Marius asks. “Some more of that sweet seaweed tea?”

Lyf looks over to him. “No, I think I’ve had enough seaweed tea for now.”

“You know, if it’s worth anything at all, I, uh… I think your hair’s pretty.”

They huff out a laugh, but it sounds wrong. “You trying to make me feel better?”

“Is it working?”

“….I give you points for the effort.”

He sees Raphaella giving him a knowing smirk, but he ignores it.

Casual conversation. This was good. And, yeah, Marius does think Lyf’s hair looks kinda nice- he’s a skilled liar, but he wasn’t lying about that- but now really isn’t the time to be distracted by it. If his attempt to lighten the mood helped, that was good.

Marius looks over Lyf once more. He almost wants to reach over and smooth back Lyf’s hair from where it was falling into their face, but he knew they didn’t really like their hair being touched, so he holds back. Instead he places his hand, his flesh one, over Lyf’s, as a gesture of comfort.

“Do you want me to stay?” He says, despite this.

Their hand moves beneath his and grips his. That’s all he needs to know. Lyf may be slightly out of their head right now, which was understandable if this change was somehow connected to the Bifrost, but they need someone here. Marius can do that.

Raphaella runs a few tests and scans, asking them some questions here and there. Meanwhile, Marius tries to fill the space with jokes here and there, mostly for Lyf’s sake. He talks to them to distract them from whatever Raphaella is doing, trying to keep their mind off whatever questions must for sure be bouncing all around inside their head. She took a blood sample at one point, during which Marius found out Lyf had one hell of a grip. It was half a joke that Marius had offered his hand to hold, but even though it was his metal one that Lyf latched onto, he could still feel their grasp. Surprisingly strong. Raphaella also tried to pluck a strand of their hair, but Lyf adamantly refused and weakly batted her away.

When she’s done, Lyf doesn’t stick around to hear anything else- okay, fair. Raphaella is too busy chattering to herself about the data she’s gathered to notice, and she’ll be at that for a while analyzing what she’s found. Marius follows Lyf out of the lab.

“Hey, Lyf, wait up!” He calls before they can get too far.

Lyf stops and looks back, though they look like they’d rather just keep going; somewhere, anywhere. They don’t say anything, pulling their blanket closer around themself.

“Sorry, I-” They’re looking down at the floor. “I know out of anyone here she’ll know what’s causing, um… you know. I don’t doubt her expertise, but I can’t stand to hear her rambling on like I’m a test subject.”

“Yeah, that’s fair.” He agrees.

They don’t move, but Marius notices how pale and weary they look, so he puts forth an idea.

“I know you probably just wanna scuttle away and forget about all this, but hear me out- Want me to make you breakfast? Getting some food in you might help.”

* * *

It’s nowhere near close to being time for breakfast yet. And even if it was, sometimes the crew just ignored it and breakfast turned into brunch. As Lyf sits on the top of the kitchen table, watching Marius quietly fry up some eggs, they don’t really expect anyone else to come wandering in (except maybe Toy Soldier). They don’t think anyone else will be here for a while yet. Still, they don’t exactly want anyone seeing them like this.

They’ve managed to pull themself together, but they know that whatever Raphaella finds, it will all lead back to one simple conclusion. That they are-

“Here.”

Lyf jolts from their thoughts and looks to find Marius holding out a plate to them. They must have spaced out; they didn’t notice him finishing with the cooking.

“Eggs and toast.” Marius says. “Just fried up the egg whites for you and there’s cinnamon on the toast. That okay with you?”

Lyf takes the plate. “It’s fine. I don’t have much of an appetite, but...”

He shrugs. “That’s okay. Whatever you don’t eat I’ll just toss in the recycler.”

They poke at the eggs with the fork as Marius takes a seat in one of the chairs. Neither of them really say anything as Lyf attempts to eat the food, managing to get through half of it before deciding that it’s enough.

“Trying to gently bully me into some self care, are we?” Lyf says to Marius, mostly to fill the silence.

He shrugs. “Like I said, thought it would help. Back there you were a bit...” He doesn’t say it, but Lyf knows what he means. He quickly backtracks a moment later. “But we don’t have to talk about it!”

They turn away, choosing instead to force another bite of toast into them. “You didn’t have to do this for me.”

“It’s no problem, Lyf; really. Remember what I told you back on that planet we stopped at after picking you up?”

Lyf remembers, just as they remember the song they dreamed of. Not a song of static, but of a soothing voice banishing away their nightmares.

It’s a better thing to think about than earlier… when they had seen themself so clearly painted with that hideous amalgamation of color. And Marius saw that. He’s seen it and Lyf knows he realizes what it means, even if he doesn’t say it. They don’t know how Marius can look at them now, act like everything’s okay.

(But Lyf remembers how Marius held them as they shook; his presence grounding them and keeping them present.)

“Still… I-” They shiver. “I was a bit of a mess before.”

“I mean, that’s fine. I get it. Can’t blame you for reacting how you did. You know, some of us here didn’t take too well to our forced immortality, and when that happens, things can get messy. Or at least that’s what I’ve heard; I didn’t join the crew till after the airlock incident. Even then, I’ve always approached the concept of immortality with a bit of skepticism.”

“I’m not immortal.” They counter.

“I know; just using that as an example.” Marius smiles at them. “We’re all stuck on this boat together and kinda messed up in one way or another. None of us are strangers to traumatic experiences that leave us changed; forced immortality or otherwise.”

That smile- it’s so true and unguarded. It stirs an emotion in Lyf’s chest that they can’t place quite yet.

They set the plate down on the table and hop off onto the floor. “I’m going back to my room.”

“Oh.” He almost sounds disappointed they’re leaving. “You gonna be okay or…?”

They almost laugh. They’re certainly not okay right now.

“I want to be alone for a bit. I need to think; process, well, this.” They gesture to their hair to get the point across.

“Want me to let you know what Raph finds?”

“I’ll ask her later.” They make to leave the kitchen, but stop in the doorway. “Um, thanks. For making me breakfast.”

They chose not to linger any longer and start to head back towards the direction of their room, a cold chill settled over them.

* * *

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t worried about Lyf. Finding them in the state they had been sure wasn’t a pretty sight. Sure, in the eight years he’s known them, he’d never seen the former inspector so upset, even in times where they were clearly not having a good day at all. Lyf had always seemed to keep a composed demeanor, at the best and worst of times. Marius only ever really saw it broken if he could get them riled up enough. But earlier, when he found them in their room, they just looked so…

Marius drums his fingers on the counter top, glancing over at the plate Lyf left behind. At least they’d taken the offering of food. Still, the image of Lyf staring at him with a frightened look in their eyes as he saw their rainbow hair, watching them back themself up against their bed as if they could hide away, only filed him with concern. He didn’t like seeing Lyf so scared. He wanted to just hold them in an embrace like he did before and chase all their fears away.

But at the same time, he understood Lyf’s wish to be alone; to process it, as they put it. What else could you really do when you realize the very thing that practically ate your star system, forced you to leave, and slapped you with trauma fucked you up more than you had assumed? Whatever’s going on with Lyf- he can’t blame them for being freaked out about it. He understood.

So he’ll let Lyf be… for now.

After cleaning the plate left behind, Marius goes to find something else to bide his time. No one else from the crew has bothered him, which means no one else is up (aside from Ivy since she didn’t really sleep, and Raphaella, but she’s probably still in her lab). He decides to work on a song he’s been composing- maybe he could play it for Lyf later to cheer them up! Or at least what he’s got so far. He can always use the excuse he’s trying to bounce ideas off of someone.

(even though this particular song is one he’s been composing for Lyf)

Sometime later he moves onto reorganizing some stuff around the med bay (because why not) and it’s as he’s trying to shoo a few octokittens away that snuck onto one of the cots when Toy Soldier decides to show up to tell him more of the crew is awake. He supposes they’ll be wanting breakfast.

No one really seems to take notice of Lyf’s absence while he cooks, though Marius can’t help but let his mind drift to them. Poor guy just can’t seem to catch a break. After everything, there’s now some weird, likely Bifrost related- things happening to them. And just when it seemed like Lyf was finally settling into life aboard the Aurora too.

He’s setting out food for everyone when Raphaella glides in holding a few papers in her hands. She’s got that look on her face that says “I’ve found something scientifically interesting!”, which likely means she’s through going through whatever data on Lyf she got and is more than eager to share with the rest of them.

“What are you looking so happy about?” Jonny questions as he stabs his french toast.

“I’ve been busy in my lab for the past few hours going over some very exciting data.” She says as she sits between Marius and Ivy. “Our newest crewmate has proven quite an interesting subject; scientifically speaking.”

“Don’t tell me you’ve already made a science experiment out of the poor fellow.” Tim adds.

“Nothing of the sort. I just ran a few tests on them.”

“Is Edda alright?” Ivy asks, her gaze shifting to Marius.

“What are you looking at me for?” He questions.

“You’re the one who’s closest to them.”

Dammit. They’re gonna find out anyway if Lyf decides to show their face any time soon. “I mean, if you’re asking if they’re okay? I don’t know? I went to see them earlier but they were a wreck when I found them. There was this weird rainbow stuff in their hair and, they said something was wrong with them so I took them to Raph. Last I knew they wanted to be alone.”

“Ah. I was wondering why they hadn’t joined us this morning.”

“You know, if one of you dyed their hair in their sleep they’re gonna be pissed once they calm down.” He says this as if that’s what’s really going on- it’s not, and he knows it.

“I doubt that’s the case.” Raph cuts in before diving into what she really wanted to say. “The data shown by my tests does indicate Lyf is undergoing some kind of change. Probably has been since they left Yggdrasil, or possibly earlier, given how long they spent studying the Black Box. I don’t know the full extent of it, but it is evident in a few physical changes; first their eyes and now their hair. I remember they once told me they thought they might be able to see more color now, and I’ve noticed their body temperature is lower than normal for them. It’s highly likely their exposure to the Bifrost has caused this.”

“Well, they did barely outrun a multi-colored cosmic horror.” Ashes points out. “Not surprising they’ve got something to show for it.”

“Exactly.” Raphaella continues. “When we first brought them aboard, I took some readings to gauge exposure. Purely for scientific purposes of course, and to add to my own data on the Bifrost. I compared those to readings I took when they were in the lab this morning, but this time I found these readings were elevated; much higher than the initial ones. Now, me and Ivy did hypothesize their body has absorbed a bit of the Bifrost- basically they now contain a fragment of it inside them from their exposure. There’s also the addition that they give off an energy signature that matches the Bifrost. In my new readings though, I’ve found this energy has suddenly intensified out of nowhere. This points to a hypothesis that it might be starting to cause more drastic changes to Lyf.

“What’s also interesting however, is what I found when I took a sample of their blood. Not only have I found traces of the Bifrost in their blood, but I think I’ve found evidence of advanced healing. To top it off, it might be as strong as our own.”

That gets Marius’s attention, as well as Jonny’s.

“Are you suggesting they’re like us?” Jonny asks.

“Don’t know for sure. Could be the case-”

“And we’re not testing that.” Marius interrupts, mostly for Lyf’s sake. He remembers that the first time they went planetside with the rest of the crew they were accidentally shot in the arm. Marius had patched them up, but within a day they said it didn’t bother them anymore and they appeared fully recovered soon after. Marius had assumed they had a high pain tolerance, but if they really had developed regeneration that might explain that instance.

“Is that just a Yggdrasilan thing or…?” Jonny’s words trail off as he makes a vague gesture, but Marius know what he’s getting at.

“Jonny, I highly doubt a certain someone found them and gave them our curse.” Brian assures him. “There’s no evidence of that. It sounds like this is another side effect of this Bifrost exposure.”

“The Black Box did come directly from the train.” Raphaella says. “Us three know Lyf studied that thing for hours- days- upon end. Not to mention, when we left, the barest fringes of the Bifrost started to bleed into Midgard. It’s a wonder it didn’t kill or warp them outright, but that’s probably how they were exposed.”

“As long as it’s not the work of you-know-who.” Jonny takes the container of maple syrup and pours a bit more than necessary over his french toast.

Ivy speaks up again. “Technically speaking it could be influence from Yog-Sothoth. I did calculate a chance of something like this happening- it’s within the realm of possibilities.”

“So our new crewmate was touched by an eldritch god is what you and Raph are saying.” Ashes says to confirm.

“Correct.”

“Left alive as the sole survivor, but not unscathed. It would seem their story isn’t quite done yet.” Jonny comments again. “Interesting. As long as they don’t start to melt the ship into rainbow goop.”

“Well, don’t go poking them about their hair next time you see them.” Marius warns. “They’ll probably stab you if you do.”

“I did give them that dagger from Jotunheim a while back. They could get some practice with it at least.” Tim says.

“Hah. Sounds like a normal Tuesday.” Jonny replies. “And no dagger practice on the captain.”

“First mate.”

In retaliation Jonny tries to steal Tim’s french toast and gets a fork in the hand for it. Marius rolls his eyes at Jonny.

Meanwhile, Brian speaks again. “I agree with Marius. Lyfrassir has been through a lot already; they’ve only just started warming up to the rest of us, or at least what I gather from our interactions. Lyfrassir seemed pretty happy when Nastya named them bosun last week.”

“Think they’re just looking for things to do.” Marius suggested. And as he says this, he realizes there’s someone missing from the table (aside from Toy Soldier). “Wait, has anyone seen Nastya?”

* * *

“What are you doing in the vent system, Lyfrassir? Normally, that’s my hiding place.”

Lyf opens their eyes at Nastya’s voice, and they don’t have to look far to see that she’s looking at them through the now open maintenance closet door.

“I, uh….” They hope she can’t see their hair in the light that’s being let in. “I’m… cold.” 

Lame excuse, really, but not an untrue one.

After their brief conversation with Marius, Lyf had returned to their room, not wanting to chance running into anyone else. They couldn’t drive away the thoughts that were buzzing around in their head though. How long as it been inside them? How long has it been changing them? How much of it is a part of them now? They should have known. As they wondered all this, Lyf couldn’t shake how cold they felt, even if they curled up in their blankets.

So eventually, after who knows how long, they had left their room to seek out someplace warmer. Eventually they had come across what they thought was a regular closet (not their best choice for an existential breakdown, in all honesty), which had turned out to be a maintenance closet for the vent system. As stupid as it was to have practically gone into the vents, it was actually big enough to fit them, and it was warm. Plus, there was the pleasant and constant hum of Aurora’s systems; the ambiance oddly grounding. But of course now Nastya has found them.

To their surprise, she nods at their answer. “It is warm, isn’t it? I would crawl in the vents sometimes, in my early days aboard. I still do. It’s like a warm hug from my love.”

Right. Nastya was in a relationship with Aurora. “Did Aurora tell you I was here?”

Another nod, and they sigh. Of course she did.

“Still doesn’t answer my question.” She insists. They don’t answer her, so she frowns and drops her voice to a gentler tone. “Why don’t you come on out of there?”

At first they don’t want to, but… it’s Nastya. Aside from Marius, Lyf had good friendships with Ivy and Nastya. The engineer had trained them as a bosun, during which Lyf had shared many a conversation with her. Surprisingly, they had some parallels in their respective experiences prior to their lives now. Besides, they couldn’t exactly stay in the here forever.

They sigh, leaving the closet, but not meeting Nastya’s eyes. They hoped she didn’t ask about the sudden change in hair color that much.

“Are you feeling alright, Lyfrassir?” She asks. “You look a bit unwell.”

“Ha. No; no I’m not sick. At least I don’t think so. But something’s… something...” They can’t bring themself to voice it again. They don’t want to. They don’t want to put words to what they’re painfully aware of.

There’s suddenly a hand on their shoulder. “Aurora said she was worried about you.”

“She did?”

“She’s pleased with the work you have been doing under my guidance. She thinks of you as a friend. So, yes, she told me this.”

Strange to think a ship would be concerned about him, but Aurora was no ordinary ship. “That’s nice-”

“I must say, I’m a bit concerned as well. You’ve seemed off lately.”

Gods, she was just as persistent as Marius. “I mean, there is something bothering me- Honestly, when you asked if I was okay I was half expecting you to ask about my hair instead.”

Nastya shrugs. “Didn’t really cross my mind. Thought you were trying something new.”

“Something like _this_? After what I escaped? No way. But you see that’s the thing. It’s like what happened with my eyes.”

“Ah, I see. Are you thinking this was because of your brush with the Bifrost? Yog-Sothoth?” Lyf tenses at the name. Nastya must have taken notice, because she says a moment later. “Forget I asked.”

“I don’t know anymore. I guess in hindsight I was obviously exposed to… to _something_ in between getting the Black Box and leaving Midgard.”

“Well, if we’re talking traumatic life-altering events- join the club. We’ve all got that. Not your circumstances exactly, but we know this variant of suffering. We all got the same shock of how we were changed, just as you are now. Such a burden to cast something like what you have been through on someone so young.”

“I’m 34.” Lyf deadpaned, remembering Nastya had told them once that she was 17 when she was mechanized.

“And Brian was 32 when he was shot into space and left for dead. Technically, you’re still young in comparison to us.”

Okay, she did have a point. Nastya, and the rest of the Mechs had been alive for thousands of years, unable to age or die.

“Technically speaking.” Lyf repeats.

“Point being, this ship’s full of immortals who know a thing or two about trauma, myself included. We’re around to talk to so you don’t have to hide away in the vents. You’re one of our crew and we look after each other.” She offers a kind smile, and then suggests. “Why don’t you go find Marius? He loves psychoanalyzing people, and I know he’s particularly interested in you.”

“Ah, no, that’s- that’s not- I saw him earlier.”

“Oh? And how was that?”

“We… talked for a bit. He, um… made me breakfast.”

Her smile gets wider, amused. “That’s nice.”

And there’s that feeling again. “Right, um… I- I think I’m going to go back to my room and try to warm up; take a bath maybe. Probably isn’t healthy for me to be in the vent system too long.”

“Since you’re mortal, maybe. The octokittens like to travel using the vents too; not just me.”

“Uh… I’ll… keep that in mind.”

* * *

Lyf tries a new plan of attack to fight their persistent chill away, as well as distract themself: draw a hot bath. They don’t know if they’re just stressed over their realization, or if the temperature circulation on the ship is broken- they just don’t want to be cold anymore. There were probably better options than hiding in the vents anyway. So, a bath it was. They don’t make it so hot it would be scalding, but warm enough for their needs.

They look into the mirror of their bathroom as the tub slowly fills up. Their reflection seems to shimmer like their hair.

They bite their lip.

‘ _No, don’t think about it.’_ They tell themself, turning away.

Once the water is drawn, they strip their clothes and climb into the tub, savoring the burst of warmth from their feet to the rest of their body as the water makes contact with their skin. They sigh and lean back, closing their eyes. After a few minutes, the chill does start to fade away. They try to focus on the warmth of the water, not on… other things.

They can’t drive those thoughts away completely though; lingering at the back of their mind. They know that they’re-

No.

Lyf grabs some soap and starts to pour water over their head, desperately trying to wash the rainbow colors from their hair. If the new colors wash away then maybe it’s not- maybe someone really did prank them and it’s not- it’s not-

They even go so far as to force their head under the warm water, holding themself there for five seconds before their lungs demand air again. They bring their head back up above the water’s surface and they blink the water from their eyes, pushing the hair that clung to their face away. The edges of their vision swam with rainbows, however.

They screw their eyes shut and shake their head, willing those colors to go away. They manage to do that, but when they brave a look at their hair, they still see rainbow reflecting on the ends like light on oil. The water did nothing.

Lyf sucks in a breath and buries their head in their hands, fresh tears coming to their eyes. “...Fuck.”

There’s no denying what they already know; trying to forget isn’t going to hide it. No hiding in vents, warm baths, or well-meant breakfasts would help to forget or hide the truth. They suppose deep down they’ve known, ever since their eyes went silver really. They were changing in a way that alarmed them, and in those past times where a subtle change had occurred, Lyf pushed the logical explanation away, not wanting to believe. They didn’t want to think about it; acknowledge it. In the end, they can’t deny it, and they know it, not when the evidence is so clear.

It’s a painful realization; knowing that the thing that destroyed their world, everything they ever knew, was probably deeply intertwined with them. It makes them feel sick.

Lyf slumps down into the water. They’re so caught up in this, much like they had been when they had woken to find their hair shot through with rainbow, that they don’t notice movement in the room. That something else had come in through the vents. They don’t notice a form has appeared on the sink next to the tub, oozing over to the edge. The form tries to go from the sink to the tub, but doesn’t calculate the distance well and drops down into the water.

Broken from their spiral, they startle and back up against the tub as far as they can, trying to see what the Hel had just fallen into the tub. When a tortoiseshell cat head pokes above the water and starts meowing in despair, Lyf forgets about their own for a moment.

“Shh! Shh! It’s okay!” Lyf reaches forward and picks up the octokitten; _their_ octokitten. Gods, they can’t believe they went and adopted an octokitten. “It’s okay, Sigrid! You’re not going to drown.”

Once out of the water, the critter calms down. She gives a sad meow and gently baps at them with a tentacle. Lyf sniffles, still a bit caught up in their own emotions, but forces a smile.

“You silly thing. How did you get in here?” Sigrid, for her part looks miserable. Maybe octokittens didn’t like water that much either, which was weird, considering they pretty much half an octopus. “Vents. Of course. That’s- that’s a completely logical explanation. At least you’re not something squamous. Not like me...”

They take the octokitten and set her on the stand on the other side of the tub. Sigrid settles down on the towel there and meows at Lyf again. They hum something briefly and sink back into the water.

Maybe this is the price they pay for escaping Yggdrasil ahead of the Bifrost; not just carrying the burden of being the only survivor. They had merely left their report as warning- a lousy attempt. They hadn’t even told anyone they were leaving, not even their family. They’d grabbed what they could in their panic and charted a ship. They’d fled like a coward.

And now they were… Well, _something_ was happening to them, that much was clear. Something so very clearly Bifrost related. What would be the end result though, they didn’t know.

(Maybe they’d end up like the people they saw in the Black Box recordings. That possibility scared them. They couldn’t let that happen.)

They’re certainly not who they used to be, at least. That person died when Yggdrasil did. And if they were changing into some kind of eldritch creature, what were they supposed to do with that?

When they feel the water has cooled down past its initial temperature, Lyf sets the water to drain from the tub and they get out. Sigrid is still sitting on top of the towel, so Lyf just goes to grab another one to dry off with. They run the towel over their body once before wrapping it around their waist. They return to Sigrid and manage to get her wrapped up in the towel she was sitting on, drying off her fur as they walk from their bathroom to their bed. They place Sigrid down first, but she crawls right into their lap once they sit down.

“You don’t think I’m strange?” Lyf asks the octokitten. Sigrid bleeps and starts to pur. They pet her head, and their mind starts to wander back to a memory from earlier when they were in a far worse state.

They’d been a wreck, yeah, but they remember, though the haze, Marius’s arms around them. They remember him helping them stand before going to Raphaella’s lab. They remember his smile just before they left the kitchen.

Their hand stills on top of Sigrid’s head.

Lyf knew that, as immortal space pirates, the Mechanisms had probably seen plenty of weird shit like what was happening to them over the many centuries of their immortal lives. Marius hadn’t seemed too phased by these new changes that were overtaking Lyf, and neither had Nastya or Raphaella. But it’s their interaction with Marius that they’re stuck on.

He just… He wanted to help them. He wanted to make sure they were okay. He stayed by their side.

Lyf doesn’t know what to do with that. When was the last time someone did that for them (outside of their family)?

They don’t really have anyone anymore, ever since leaving Midgard (and Yggdrasil as a whole), and maybe they were just desperate for that comfort. Still, they feel the ghost of his touch on their skin. The whisper of his words. The warmth of his smile.

Lyf resumes petting Sigrid’s head. All of Marius’s actions earlier stood out to them- when was the last time someone had comforted them like that?

They had never really had anyone back on Midgard either. Family, yes. A cat they had until five months before the Black Box was assigned to them. However, not much to speak of in the way of friends. Their co-workers at the station didn’t really count as friends. The only people they had really been close to at all were the three prisoners that had constantly made their life more difficult. That was kinda sad, but then again, so was being a fucking traffic cop, and so was their social life. It was lonely.

Drifting through space in the wake of the Bifrost’s emergence hadn’t helped at all, and maybe that made them just a little bit desperate for some kind of comfort. Marius was an unexpected source, but he did just that.

And Lyf hadn’t minded. It felt nice; knowing someone cared.

* * *

There’s no sign of Lyf for a while after breakfast.

That wasn’t really unusual, as Lyf was a person that kept to themself a lot of the time; clearly introverted in nature. Plus, Lyf had taken up more things to do around the ship, namely working with Ivy on their archival project or helping Nastya with repairs. Although Marius noted that Lyf was spending more time with him, which was great. He’d thought maybe they were starting to finally open up a little. They never did get to really do that back on Midgard, for obvious (and unfortunate) reasons.

On one hand, Marius doesn’t want to bother Lyf for that reason alone. But on the other hand, he thinks back to when he found them in their room and all the worry comes rushing back.

Later on, everyone convenes to practice for the new album, and he tries to put it out of his mind for a bit and play the role of Thor instead. Toy Soldier stopped by to provide snacks, and Nastya sneaks in at some point to observe. He tries to play violin at her, plays up his role, but she just rolls her eyes at him. Ah, the joys of having a rival violinist.

Once they’re done practice, he asks Nastya she’s been up to (she had skipped breakfast today). She says she was working on some things, but also mentions she found Lyf in the vents. According to her, Lyf claimed they were cold. She said they both talked for a bit, that they looked out of it, and then they wandered off again. She hasn’t seen them since.

After that, Marius tries Raphaella’s lab, remembering Lyf told him they would go see her later to see what she found. He doubts Lyf has done that, but when he gets to the lab, he finds not only Raphaella, but Ivy as well. With them both here, he might as well ask.

“Hey, have either of you two seen Lyf?” He asks.

“Not since this morning, no.” Raphaella responds first.

Ivy, from where she sits on a desk reading a book, gives a different answer. “I did see them in the library before I came over. They didn’t want to talk. They retreated back to that corner of the library they like and went to work on our project.”

Marius sighs. “Can’t say I blame them. I’d freak out too if I woke up and saw I was suddenly half a manifestation of the thing that ate my star system. Nastya said she found them in the vents earlier; one of the maintenance closets actually.”

Raphaella and Ivy share a look. “Oh dear.”

“Yeah. Like I know they want some space, but I don’t think the vents are the best place for that, even if it works for Nastya.”

“Whatever is happening to Edda is a bit unprecedented,” Ivy comments. “but one would hope they have some better coping methods.”

“They mentioned poetry once, but… I wonder if there’s something we could do to help. I mean, you’ve both seen them now; they’ve gotten thrown for a loop. Either of you got any ideas?”

“Oh! I might!” Raphaella chirps. “How about you offer to braid their hair? Back on Midgard it seemed like hair styling was a big thing. Maybe a hair styling session will lift their spirits? I always find it relaxing when Ivy plays with or braids my hair.”

“In theory that could work,” Ivy says. There’s a pause as she turns the page of her book, but Marius could tell there was more she had to say. “but if you were to go this route you would have to be very mindful. Raphaella is right when she said hair styling is- well, was- an important part of Yggdrasilian culture, especially to those on Midgard. There are two things to keep in mind, however.”

“And that would be?” Marius questions. Being stuck in prison for 60 years doesn’t provide much for observation on cultural aspects.

“The first is that hair styling is not only important; it’s a very intimate act. It is one reserved for close friends, family, and lovers. The braids they always used to have? It’s an expression of themself that’s rooted in their culture. This brings me to my second point: there is a reason they haven’t been doing their braids. Unstyled hair can be regarded as an expression of someone in mourning. Edda hasn’t done any sort of hair styling outside of tying their hair back since arriving on our starship, so there is a 99% chance this is because they are mourning the loss of their home. Be aware they might not be ready to return to doing any hair styling yet, let alone braids.”

Damn, Ivy was right. Marius had gotten the impression before that Lyf didn’t like their hair touched, but he’d always assumed that was a Lyf thing. What Ivy said made sense though, and it seemed so obvious now. If he were to offer to braid Lyf’s hair, it would probably be interpreted as an intimate gesture, and, well, that’d be awkward.

Even though Marius would like to, because he’s that much of a fool for Lyf.

But on the other hand he could still try and pass it off as an offering of comfort. They’ve been having a bad time, and he wants to show them he cares.

“I mean, I could still try.” Marius shrugs. “At worst, they slap me or something.”

* * *

Time can be easily forgotten in the library, Lyf finds. No one’s come to bother them as they sit curled up on one of the couches reading through a few books. There was so much here to read too- no wonder Ivy spent most of her time here.

Speaking of- they felt bad about brushing off Ivy’s concerns when they came in here, gathering up some books and insisting they wanted to be alone, but they had felt her watchful gaze on them and they just… they couldn’t handle it. They may have gotten the energy to leave their room and wander the ship, knowing that the Mechs have probably seen worse things than someone with rainbow hair, but they didn’t want the stares or questions.

They’re reading through a book from the Yggdrasil collection currently; a story collection from an author that had been popular on Jotunheim and Midgard. It almost feels like they’re home again, even when home is no longer a thing and they now live on a starship that was the home of the Mechanisms. They can pretend for a little bit; pretend they hadn’t lost everything and that they’re not marked by the things from beyond this fragile reality.

“Shouldn’t be surprised to find you here.”

Lyf turns their head to see Marius leaning on one of the bookshelves. When had he gotten there? Marius wasn’t one to usually be found in the library.

They’re not sure what to say at first, almost saying his name in that annoyed tone out of habit. They don’t.

“I’m the archival assistant; not just a bosun. And there’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend time in the library. Libraries are nice.”

That earns a smile from Marius. “There’s the snark I know. That mean you’re feeling better?”

Lyf sighs, shaking their head and putting the book down. “No. The book is a temporary comfort, but I’m still not… I’m not really okay at all. The difference is I’m more composed than I was this morning.” They absently twist a portion of their hair with their fingers. “Why are you here?”

“Er… That’s… Would you believe me if I said I was looking for you?”

Lyf frowns. “Looking for me.”

“Not to wind you up or anything!” He then gestures to the couch. “There space on there for me?”

They consider this. “...No violins.”

Marius grins and comes over to the couch and sits down. Lyf changes position so that they’re sitting next to him. For a moment, neither of then say anything. Marius is the first to break the quiet.

“I can always cut your hair, if you want.” He says.

Lyf turns on him, looking at him incredulously. “Pardon me?”

“Your hair.” He repeated. “I know the rainbows freaked you out, so-”

“You will do no such thing!” Lyf exclaims. “I happen to like my hair as it is!”

“Even with all the rainbow?”

“...Okay, maybe not that part, but still!” They huff and fall back against the couch. “The Bifrost may have decided to stain my hair with its colors as a “no rights for Lyfrassir” move, but I don’t think I’m upset enough to chop off 80% of my hair.”

“I can’t exactly imagine you with short hair.” Marius comments. “Doesn’t seem like you. Also, I’m too used to seeing your hair done up with fancy braids and beads and such.”

“We took hair styling very seriously on Midgard. It’s part of Yggdrasil culture in general.”

They shift their gaze over to him, finding he’s looking at them a bit strangely. Like he wants to say something, but unsure how to.

“What is it, von Raum?” They ask.

“Ah, well...” He trails off, awkwardly clears his throat, and begins again. “You see, I was- I was thinking. You’re, you know, not having a good day. You need something relaxing, and no, it’s not music, you’ve already made that clear. So there needs to be something else, and- okay, feel free to stop me if this is like too forward or something-”

“Von Raum.” Lyf interrupts. “You’re rambling. Just get to the point.”

They see him take a breath, and then- “Would you be okay with me braiding your hair?”

They freeze; brain short circuiting for a moment.

“Br… Braid my hair...” They repeat, quietly.

“...Yeah.”

Hair styling was a very personal thing in their culture. Before, it had been part of Lyf’s routine every morning, putting at least a braid or two in their hair. The only times they’ve ever had it unstyled or with just a simple sleeping braid was when they were sick or just having a bad mental health day. Now, as for having someone _else_ style their hair- that was _very, very personal_. Lyf can’t remember the last time they had someone braid their hair (aside from family), and it was a shock in general to have Marius of all people ask if he could braid their hair.

“I, uh… I...” Lyf struggles for words.

They don’t know how much- if any- of their cultural traditions Marius caught onto, but an act like that is one that requires trust, and, yes it was quite forward. It’s kind of got Lyf spinning, previous existential dread and Bifrost related trauma forgotten temporarily. They were friends now, sort of, but the significance of it- no, Marius probably just feels bad for them because of, well, everything.

And yet, Lyf finds themself saying, “I don’t mind...”

Marius had taken on a nervous expression while Lyf had been deciding what to do, but with this it melted into one of relief. “Cool.”

“Nothing too fancy, okay?”

“Yeah, of course; keep it simple. I doubt I could do anything like you like to do, but I can manage that. Also, I know you’re not a fan of people touching your hair, and I didn’t know if you’d be up for it, so of course I was gonna ask first.”

Lyf can feel themself blush as they turn so that their back is to them. “...Thank you for asking.”

The moment Marius touches their hair, their heart picks up speed; feeling him start to gently comb his fingers through their hair. It… It feels nice. He’s careful and slow as he works, softly humming a tune when he started to pull their hair, just a slight tug, into what Lyf assumed was a simple braid. They try to relax as much as they can under his touch, but it’s kind of a big thing for them. To think, the man who once tried to drive them crazy with violins now had his fingers in their hair. They could get lost in this feeling; this moment.

(It’s like one of the rare dreams between the nightmares and dreamless slumber; where Marius is running a hand through Lyf’s hair… looking down at Lyf with a fond expression...)

This was a strange turn of events. Though really, it’s been far too long since anyone who wasn’t family touched their hair, braided it, so freely (though Marius had at least asked for their consent, which they were grateful for). In fact, the last person to do something like this was their sister, before she had left for Svartalfheim. She’d done up a small little braid on the side of their head. She’d hugged them before departing, and as she looked back, she’d given them a bright smile-

That was the last time they had seen Lisbeth alive, they realized. The Ratatosk Express arrived a few days later. They’d practically hugged their sister goodbye at that time. Now she, as well as their mothers, were gone. They miss their family so much, but that didn’t matter. The Bifrost didn’t care about that. Everyone they had ever known was gone. Dead or worse.

They’d left their world to die; to burn. And they’re left alone.

Their family is gone.

They’re turning into a squamous technicolor nightmare.

They did nothing.

Everything’s gone; it had been from the moment they learned the truth.

They...

Something in Lyf breaks.

* * *

Marius is humming a tune when he first notices that something is wrong. Lyf seems to tense, and he stops the braiding, wondering if he accidentally pulled on Lyf’s hair too hard or he was making them uncomfortable (this was, according to Ivy, a profoundly intimate thing to do in Lyf’s culture).

But the moment Lyf’s shoulders start to shake and a broken sob comes from them, Marius lets go of their hair and draws his hands back like he’s been burned.

“Whoa, hey- What’s-” Marius tries, but now Lyf’s full on crying; hunched over, but still facing away from him. Maybe the hair braiding was too much.

He doesn’t know how to respond, but he’s gotta do something.

“Lyf, what’s up? Was it something I did? I- I can leave if you want-”

But at that, Lyf suddenly turns on him; reaching out and grabbing his arm.

“No!” They exclaim. Their silver eyes glimmer with tears shimmering with rainbow light. They stare at him with wide eyes, but let go of his arm and draw back. “N-no. That’s- st-stay, please.”

“...Okay.” He says, in a softer voice than he intended. Lyf sniffles and breaks eye contact, bowing their head as the tears continue to flow. “Anything I can do?”

They run a hand down their face. “I don’t- I don’t even fully know wh-what’s come over m-me. You, uh- you braiding my hair made me think of the last time I saw Lisbeth, and my m-mothers, and… a-and…”

Their voice cracks and they let out another sob. Marius thinks he knows what’s going on.

“I think I see what’s got you upset. It’s thinking about your family, yeah?” He concludes.

Lyf doesn’t say anything, but they way they tremble confirms it for him. He takes a handkerchief from his pocket and hands it to Lyf, who just stares at it. Marius decides to take it a step further, take Lyf’s arm, and gently pulls them close to him. Lyf willingly falls into the embrace, wrapping their arms around him. Marius, in return, puts a hand on their back and rubs up and down comfortingly.

“I miss them.” Lyf says. “Gods, I miss them so much it hurts. And they’re gone. All I have left of them is a ring. I didn’t tell them I was leaving; I didn’t tell anyone. I wouldn’t have gotten word to Lisbeth in time, but my mothers…. I just left that stupid report; that was it. I should have done more; I should have tried.”

“I mean, in your situation- nothing wrong with running away. And do you really think anyone was going to listen on such short notice and without seeing and knowing like you did?”

“Maybe so… but I left them to die; everything I knew and cared about.”

“But you’re still here, aren’t you?”

A hand grabs onto the fabric of his vest. “You mean here and likely turning into a squamous creature.”

It’s understandable; what Lyf’s feeling. He knows they’re traumatized from the whole experience in general, but there’s gotta be some survivors guilt playing into this as well. Top it off with the fact something weird and eldrtichy is going on with them- that’s a lot to handle. They’ve been dealing with all this (except the last part; that’s new) since they got here, and Lyf’s never really talked about it much, but Marius knew it was bothering them more than what he could see. There was what happened this morning too, but their state then seemed to be mostly fueled by panic. Whatever is happening to them must have brought all they’ve been holding in to a breaking point.

“You wanna know what I think, Lyf?” Marius says, still rubbing circles into their back. “Given the circumstances, there’s little you could have done. We certainly didn’t help matters, I’ll admit, but by that point there was no time. So, you did the only thing you could have, and now you’re here. I think that, while you put on a calm demeanor, everything that’s happened has been wearing you down inside and after what happened this morning it’s all getting out.”

“Are you-” A sniffle. “Are you trying to psychoanalyze me?”

“Just making an observation is all. And yeah, you’re changing, and that’s hard. Trust me, I know. If it means anything though, I don’t think you’re turning into some monster. You’re the same Lyfrassir Edda I know; just more interesting.”

“...Do you mean that? You know what’s done this to me.”

Marius does know. They didn’t really… talk about it after going to Rpahaella’s lab. Marius has heard her findings by now, but this discussion has gone unsaid between himself and Lyf. He’s not bothered about it himself, but he knows this new revelation has shaken Lyf, and that’s what’s got him more concerned.

But what more can he say.

“Of course.” It’s an answer to both. He feels Lyf tighten their grip, but at this point he just lets it happen. “Hey, you don’t have to, but- can I finish your braid?”

“Yes.” Lyf responds, their voice worn from crying. “You may.”

“Cool.” He can manage this, even with Lyf holding onto him like this. Marius takes their hair back up and resumes approximately where he left off; working slow, but with purpose.

To his surprise, Lyf practically snuggles into him more. They’re probably seeking out the nearest source of comfort, he reasons. “...Feels nice.”

Marius smiles. “Good to hear it.”

“Trauma sucks. Finding out you’re turning kind of eldritch sucks.”

“I can’t speak to the latter, but to the former I agree.”

“I wonder sometimes, you know, if I might have been the catalyst for all of it. When I came to see you, after Ivy fixed the Black Box, something strange happened to me. The things I saw… I can’t forget. It felt surreal, like I was actually there. And something… something with far too much color clutched at my soul. What if when I looked back into the Black Box, when I saw the truth- what if that’s what broke everything completely? What if _I_ did that?”

“Can’t say for certain if it did or not. Ivy would probably say it’s a possibility, but I don’t think so. By that point, it was only a matter of time.”

“But what if I did?” Lyf repeats. “It would explain why it left me alive. Why it marked me. And now it’s a part of me.”

“You know it’s not your fault though, yeah? You couldn’t have known. Even we didn’t have the full story.” Marius finishes Lyf’s braid and pulls back slightly from them. “But how about this? Whatever it means, I'll be here to help you figure it out.”

Lyf still has the handkerchief and they try to wipe away their remaining tears with it. “You?”

“Yeah! New crewmate gets eldritch powers? Could be fun.”

For the first time in a while, Lyf laughs; genuine. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Don’t forget charming.”

They lightly punch his shoulder, but there’s no force behind it at all. All Marius can do is smile.

* * *

Lyf dreams that night. They don’t dream of anything that’s from their nightmares, but instead they dream that they're back on that little ship they spent a week drifting around in.

They dream of being cold. They dream they’re alone. They dream of being lost.

But then, as they’re on the verge of collapsing into despair, someone else appears to them. He smiles and laughs, saying that he finally found them.

He holds out a hand, and Lyf takes it, allowing themself to be pulled into his arms.

“What took you so long?” Lyf asks, tears in their eyes.

A hand of flesh and bone comes up to rest on the side of their face. They lean into the touch, moments before they close the gap between them and kiss him. He returns it, filling their heart with so much love-

…..

Lyf wakes; staring at the ceiling with the wetness of tears in their eyes. Their octokitten, Sigrid, is asleep at their feet. All is quiet.

“...Marius.” They whisper into the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seaweed tea is a thing! I have some that I get from a local co-op!


	7. Breathe A Little Deeper (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lyf deals with how the Bifrost has changed them, as well as their realized feelings for a certain someone. Meanwhile, Marius is trying to keep Lyf's spirits up. Also there's some pinning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay between this and the previous chapter. Initially this was supposed to be one chapter, but in the end I split it into two parts. I also got distracted by irl things; mainly work and stress. (though it does not help I also got distracted by the new D2 expansion, Beyond Light, that dropped in early november).
> 
> Chapter title from Breathe Deeper, by Tame Impala.

“Good morning, Lyf~!” Marius calls from outside their door, loudly. He frowns when there’s no response. “It’s just me; your favorite space pirate/doctor!”

A screen pops out from the wall. **{** **AUR:** You’re not a doctor. **}**

He startles a bit. “Aurora! Stop jump scaring me; it’s too early. I know you have access to message my phone. And for the record, I'm only _technically_ not a doctor. I know some things at least!”

 **{AUR:** Mm, yes I’m aware. Anyway, if it’s Lyf you’re looking for, they’re up. They seem to know you’re here but are choosing not to answer. **}**

“Yeah, I figured.”

Lyf’s been taking this whole eldritch-revelation-thing about as well as could be expected, at least as far as Marius could tell. He sees them around, but half the time they look lost in thought if not busy with something. It makes him wonder how well Lyf is actually coping with everything that’s happening to them. Physical aspects about themself have changed, and more recently Lyf’s seemed to develop enhanced reflexes and strength. It was clear to Marius this- every new change- troubled them, not like he can blame them.

Marius has taken to checking on Lyf, just to make sure they’re doing alright. To this end, for the past few days, he would talk Lyf into helping him with making breakfast. They followed each time, but there was still that sense that there was something on their mind; seeming distracted while the rest of the crew had breakfast and not staying around long. Marius supposes once they broke through the initial shock, and the apparent emotional breakdown they’d been holding in, it only makes sense they would start moping around trying to sort it all out. Eldritch side effects probably made that difficult.

But something like what they’re going through isn’t easy; he should know. He was left alone, confused, and angry in the aftermath of a betrayal; of his own hubris and overconfidence. Oh, and then there was suddenly having a newfound immortality (complete with the metal arm). It wasn’t fun. He could of used a friend back then. He found Raphaella later, sure, but before that it was just him.

So, he wants to give Lyf what he didn’t have back then, because he knows how much this sucks and he won’t let anyone else go through it alone.

The door handle turns, showing that the door isn’t locked. Slowly, Marius opens the door, but doesn’t enter the room just yet. He only pokes his head in for now.

“Lyf~!”

It isn’t hard to spot Lyf, who’s curled up on on their bed, but facing away from him. At the call of their name they don’t make any move to turn around, but they do mutter, “Gods, you’re worse than my cat I had, and she liked to wake me up at 4:30 am.”

Marius steps into the room, closing the door behind him. He’s then greeted by a meow. Looking down at the floor, he finds the source.

“Ack! An Octokitten!” He exclaims as the creature is already oozing over to him. He makes a face at it, but it bleeps at him instead.

“Don’t be mean to Sigrid, Marius.” Lyf says. Marius looks up to find they’re sitting up in bed now; blanket in their lap and their hair messy and coming undone from their sleep braid. Fuck, it’s a cute look. And also the fact they’ve started calling him by his first name? Well, he tried not to freeze up by how nice his name sounded when they said it.

“I’m doing no such thing! Hey, do you think they like violins? I’m not sure what kind of effect music has on them-”

“Gods help me- don’t you even dare. It’s too early for that.”

“It’s never too early for some music!”

Lyf groans and flops back down onto the bed. Marius ignores the octokitten that’s biting his shoe and walks over to them. He stops at the edge of the bed and looks down at Lyf. Their rainbow stained bangs are kinda falling into their eyes a little.

Their tired gaze shifts over to him. “What?”

He smiles. “Good morning!”

“Why are you here?”

“Cause I wanted to see if you’d like to help me with breakfast. I can show you how to make a hash-brown casserole!”

The octokitten, Sigrid, makes another noise and Lyf sits up, pushing their hair from their face before briefly leaving the bed and leaning down.

“Come here, Sigrid.” They say, though their voice sounds dull. She goes right to their outstretched arms. “Silly- I know you can just crawl up onto the bed.”

Lyf hoists her up and she nuzzles their chest when they pull her close, closing their eyes for a moment. The octokittens are pests, but seeing Lyf with this one- there’s something undeniably soft about the sight. It’s too cute.

They step back and sit on the edge of the bed. Sigrid squirms out of Lyf arms and decides she wants to be perched on Lyf’s head instead.

“Uh, she might try and eat your hair.” Marius warns.

Lyf shrugs. “She’s fine. She likes to sit there or on my shoulder sometimes if I’m reading or something. She hasn’t eaten my hair yet.”

Their hands are on their knees and they’re staring forward blankly as Sigrid settles on their head. Marius sits down next to them on the bed.

“Rough night? Bad thoughts?”

“Both. My… My dreams are, um...” They take in a slow breath. “...And I can’t stop thinking about what I’m becoming. All of it. And I’ll admit, it’s crossed my mind- the possibility that I might be… I might not be safe to be near. I might become dangerous because of this.” They gesture to their hair and eyes as a way of indicating the Bifrost. “That is if I haven’t become so already.”

“Sounds like it’s some intrusive thoughts eating at you. Also, you say that as if this place isn’t crawling with space pirates who’ve committed tons of crimes and know multiple ways of killing someone. And, you know, don’t really worry too much about dying. It’s just a temporary condition for us. In fact, adding someone else to the crew that can cause some chaos- the more the merrier.”

“I’m aware of that. Have you ever encountered someone like me though? Someone who was touched by Outer Gods and is clearly turning eldritch.”

“Well… no. But, you know, you’re not like others we’ve met. They usually don’t last very long.”

“Gee, thanks.” Lyf deadpans.

Marius flashes them a grin, and continues. “Anyway, you know I don’t think you’re a monster, but if it makes you feel any better, all of us here are kinda monsters in our own way. You probably knew this already, but we’re not exactly good people, myself included. But the one thing that ties us all together is exactly why we look after each other, fucked up as we are. When I came here, the crew was kinda scary at first, especially Jonny, and there was already a violinist, but… they still took me and Raph in. Having one more misfit isn’t gonna bother anyone.”

“I… I guess so. I’ve made it this far. At the very least, trying to adjust to a life with immortal space pirates is proving easier than coping with becoming whatever the Hel I am now. So much has changed. My home, my world, lost to a rainbow colored nightmare. Myself, as I am now. The fact I live with you and the others aboard this starship.”

“Didn’t think this is where you’d find yourself?”

“No. Never in a million years. When I first met you I was aware of your reputation within the Yggdrasil system. You and the others are space pirates. I didn’t exactly think of you like I do now...” Their voice gets oddly quiet and soft. Their expression seems almost...fond. “But I’ve had time to observe you all and hear the stories.”

“Full disclosure, if we’re reflecting on the past now, I could say the same about you. You were working with the transport division of New Midgard’s police system when we met. But you’re not an inspector anymore, so it’s fine.”

“You and the others had your fun. On that note, I suppose it would make you happy to know I had been strongly considering quitting my job before I fled.”

His eyebrows rose. “No shit. Really?”

“Mmhm.” Lyf confirmed with a nod. “I was going to do it after I finished investigating the Ratatosk. I didn’t think the investigation would end up going where it did. In any case, when you got down to it, I really hated my job.”

“I mean, we all figured.”

“That and you kept trying to convince me to quit.”

“So it worked?”

“...Maybe slightly. You, as well as Raphaella and Ivy, may or may not have accelerated a revaluation of my life.”

“Ha!” Marius exclaims, giving a short but loud laugh. Sigrid still sits on top of Lyf’s head, not amused but not trying to eat their hair either. Lyf… is smiling, just slightly. The way they’re looking at him now- it wasn’t the same as how they would have looked at him before. It was the look of someone who had been changed; who had gone through so much and couldn’t catch a break. It was tired and weary, but more relaxed and open than Marius had seen before.

Sigrid meows again, breaking the moment, and Marius looks at the creature, finding her staring at him.

“She doesn’t bite.” Lyf says. “You can pet her.”

He’s skeptical about that, but hesitantly reaches out a hand toward the octokitten. Sigrid sniffs his hand, then licks it. Marius recoils slightly at that, but still moves to slowly scratch the creature’s ear. Well, at least this one didn’t try to bite off his finger.

* * *

Once their conversation had lapsed into somewhat of an awkward silence while Marius continue to pet Sigrid, he had gotten a message on his phone saying others were awake and demanding breakfast. Lyf told him to go on ahead, but the moment he left, they removed Sigrid from their head, set her down, grabbed a pillow, and covered their face with it, falling back in bed again.

They were so fucked.

Really, the last thing Lyf had been expecting to deal with on top of realizing they were turning kinda eldritch was the realization they had genuine feelings for Marius. A gods damn crush. Lyf had been debating it back and forth ever since they first realized they might feel such, but the events of a few days ago, and that dream they had of Marius- finding them alone in space and saving them- was what hit the nail on the head.

So yeah. They have a crush on Marius. Great.

It wasn’t like they were expecting this to happen; falling for an immortal space pirate. They can’t deny this any longer though. They know what they feel. They know how Marius makes them feel. It was a feeble flickering that had turned into something more. Even back when he had just been another prisoner, Lyf knew how Marius made them feel, hidden beneath the annoyance.

...Maybe these feelings had been there longer than they thought.

Sigrid meows and nudges her head against their arm. Lyf removes the pillow from their face and looks over at the octokitten.

“And what do you suggest I do about this, hm?” They say, reaching out and giving her a little scratch behind her ears. “It’s not like I had anticipated falling for him.”

Sigrid doesn’t reply, only purrs at them.

“Right. Guess I’ll just stew in my feelings then.”

They lay there for a while, thinking about every interaction they’ve had with Marius. Every smile, every laugh, every time he tried to play them something on his violin. In the time they knew each other, he was someone who often got on their nerves, but at the same time who Lyf felt drawn to. Lyf didn’t share many connections with people, and perhaps they had the strongest connection with Marius (and Ivy and Raphaella as well, to be fair). They had always taken comfort in that, because no matter how much they bickered, Marius always had been happy to see them, like they made his day. And now he’s found his way to their heart.

They sigh wistfully, getting lost in the memories.

After they decide they’ve laid here wallowing for long enough, they settle on going to the library to clear their head. That way they’re not thinking about how much they’re pinning after this man, or their evolving eldritchness.

When Lyf gets to the library, they find Ivy there, obviously, but they also find that Raphaella was there as well, talking with Ivy about something.

Ivy smiles at them when she notices their presence.

“Edda! There you are. I was just telling Raphaella about our project.” She greets.

“Ah, yes. That. Sorry that I’ve been-”

“You don’t need to apologize, Edda. We understand. You have all the time you need to figure it out.”

“Possibly even more!” Raphaella excitedly adds. “For all we know the Bifrost could have extended your life span!”

“Right… Can we not talk about how the rainbow madness that thought dying my hair like this would be funny?”

“Of course.” Ivy says. “We’re glad to see you though. There was still a high percentage you are still processing your new changes, which is not good on top of the obvious trauma you gained from what happened to Yggrdasil.”

“Clearly.”

She’s not wrong; they’re still going through it. Trying to adapt to whatever it was the Bifrost was doing to them. It didn’t seem to be anything too concerning yet, just a few physical changes, but Lyf was concerned about what else could change about them. Either way, they had come to the conclusion that what had destroyed everything they cared about was now a part of them. They had to live with that now.

“On the bright side, you seem to be well integrated into our crew now.” Raphaella says. “Archival assistant, bosun- all that’s left is to see if we can get you in on our band and take you on a heist!”

“Do you really regard me as one of your crew now?” Lyf asks “Even though I’m mortal?”

“We haven’t had too many mortals with us, but you’ve managed to stick with us long enough. Both of us appreciate your presence at least.”

“As much as I was reluctant to admit it, it helps having familiar faces around. Ivy’s allowed me access to this library and we now have our project about Yggdrasil, you’ve tried to make sense of how the Bifrost is changing me and help me understand, and Marius… Marius does, um- he’s just there, being himself, but that’s enough for me.

Lyf stops short of outright telling Raphaella and Ivy the true reason for that.

“Oh, that reminds me.” Raphaella says. “You and Marius seem to be on better terms now. Though I must admit, watching you two interact on Midgard was interesting. You two had such lively conversations.

“Raphaella, most of our interactions were bickering.”

“Not all of them! You often would come to us for input on your cases, and your conversations always seemed lively and productive.”

“If you mean frustrating, then yes.”

“Neither of us expected him to take an interest to you and forming a sort of rapport.” Ivy says, talking like it’s a random statistic she often interjected into conversation. “Honestly, I was slightly surprised you two didn’t hook up before the train crashed back into Midgard.”

Lyf flushes with embarrassment. “Wh-What’s that supposed to mean?”

“We always thought there was some degree of tension between you two.” Raphaella adds.

“Tension?!”

Both Ivy and Raphaella look at them like it’s an obvious statement. Lyf decides to get up and leave, flustered about that statement. So much for not thinking about pinning after Marius.

* * *

They decide to bring the revelation about Marius up to Nastya when they next see her. They’re a bit more comfortable letting her know. For one, she’s been in a long term relationship with the ship. The second reason was that though they hadn’t known her as long, their many conversations on their similar experiences had formed a sort of bond.

“I thought as much.” Nastya says, not looking up from the interface she’s working on.

“Does _everyone_ here think we had something going on when Yggdrasil still existed?” Lyf retorts.

“I got caught up on the events after I returned, but I assumed you were emotionally repressed or something.”

Lyf sighs, sitting down near her nest of blankets and pillows. Finally, Nastya sets aside her work and comes over to join them. She sits down on the pillows and blankets, taking one and dragging it across her lap.

“You sound troubled.” Nastya observes.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what to do with… this. Believe me, the last thing I expected to realize, on top of the obvious changes I’m undergoing, was this. Not that it matters. Doubt there’s anything there for someone who’s recently figured out they’re Bifrost-touched and is still mortal.”

“That doesn’t really matter to us, if that’s what you’re concerned about. How long have you felt this way about Marius?”

“...I think longer than I realize.” Lyf continues. “I’ve just spent so long pushing it away. After all the time I spent interacting with him, Raphaella, and Ivy on a regular basis- I think something grew out of that, and I think I felt it back then. I didn’t want to believe it because of my position at the time. I won’t lie though; I never hated all any of them, especially Marius. I was a tad fond of him, but that didn’t change the fact that me having feelings for someone who was effectively a prisoner was ridiculous. I think I hated myself for that...”

“And you made yourself forget.” Nastya concludes. “You never really forgot though. You don’t forget those you care about or love. When I left before, years before you came to us, I tried to forget Aurora. I tried to forget about the rest of the Mechs too. Thing is, that didn’t work. I still care about the crew, my family. I still love Aurora.”

It was a different circumstance, but Lyf understood what she was saying, and she was right. Lyf had never really forgotten their time with Marius, and how they felt about him. They just pretended not to know what it was or acknowledge it back then.

“You have a point. Even when I left Midgard, left Yggdrasil to its fate, my thoughts drifted back to him and the others. Part of me missed him in particular. When he left, with Ivy and Raphaella, I felt some mix of anger, hurt, but I did miss him. I never forgot our time together. I didn’t think I was going to run into the very crew of immortals he claimed to be a part of.”

“But you did,” Nastya pointed out. “because you’re here.”

“Yeah… I think the only thing I can’t decide upon now is… where to go from here.”

Nastya gave them a thoughtful look and then pulled over another blanket for them. Lyf took it and put it around their shoulders.

“Matters of the heart are complicated.” She said. “Even for someone like me. I would say I cannot direct you on what to do, but it’s more of a feeling you follow. Do not doubt that it’s real, because you are feeling this way, and it means something. You’ll know what to do with it in our own time.”

Lyf nodded, letting her words sink in. “Thank you. Um… Can… Can this conversation stay between us?”

Nastya looks slightly confused by the request, but shrugs. “Sure.” There’s a soft hum around them and she adds. “Aurora’s good at keeping secrets too.”

A ship keeping secrets. Strange concept, but Aurora was sentient, so best not to question it. Regardless, Lyf believed Nastya’s words. They probably would be able to figure it out at some point (hopefully before they met a likely untimely end). So they hoped.

* * *

“Marius?”

He’s tinkering with a robot that’s pretty much a space roomba when Lyf’s voice jolts him out of concentration. They’re standing in the doorway to the medbay. Marius can’t help but notice there’s a small singular braid in their hair; woven together neatly and rainbow at the end. That’s good, he hopes. But also they look good with braids.

Marius grins at them. “What brings you by today?”

Lyf takes a step in. “I- I just- Oh. What is it you’re working on?”

“I’m glad you asked!” He gestures them over and they comply. “This little thing here? It’s a robot I designed!”

“You did?”

“Why look so surprised? I did tell you I know how to work with robots.”

“You said you piloted a giant robot, to be exact.” They go to continue with whatever they were going to say, but suddenly stop and wince, putting a hand to their head.

“You okay?” Marius asks. They do look a little worn down now that he thinks about it.

Lyf nods, but it’s not convincing. “Mmph, just a headache. Actually, I wanted to see if you had anything for it.”

“Oh yeah, sure.” He gets up and rummages around in a cabinet to look for the aspirin. He also fetches a glass of water while he’s up. When he returns, he finds Lyf sitting in a chair, staring at the robot. “Here you go.”

Lyf slowly turns to him and takes the offered items. “…thanks.”

They swiftly take the pill and swallow it down with water. Marius takes his own chair back and resumes work on the robot. He’s aware of Lyf watching him, but he doesn’t mind. He doesn’t mind Lyf being here at all.

“How you been?” He asks, just to get them talking.

There’s something of a humorless laugh from Lyf. “How do you think?”

“Just thought I’d ask.”

“Hm. Haven’t noticed anything new yet, aside from the heightened reflexes and strength. I have spoken to Raphaella though. She’s, uh, very interested in adding my changes to her data on the Bifrost.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right. I’ve known her longer than anyone else in the crew, and if I know one thing about her it’s that she loves science.”

“I caught onto that quickly. She always loved it when I brought her new science articles. Otherwise she just seemed bored.”

“Raph told me she was a scientist before she got mechanized. I know the rest of her story, but it’s not my place to tell it, and I made a promise not to. In any case, she’s all about science. She’d go on for hours about whatever she had studied before after she found me, she spends the majority of her time in her lab, and she’s even done research into our immortality and how our mechanisms work. When we met, she asked me a lot of questions about my arm; wanted to open it up and see what made it tick. I didn’t let her for a good few decades because… well… it hadn’t been long after I got this stupid thing that we met.”

Lyf filled in the gap easily. “Your arm, you mean.”

He pauses in his work. “...Yeah.” He pushes back any memories that threaten to arise and turns to give Lyf a smile. “But that was a long time ago!”

They don’t say anything, and maybe they don’t necessarily have the energy to talk due to their headache, but they make a small noise of acknowledgment. When it came to the subject of his arm and his mechanization- they’ve been over this before, and Lyf respected not pushing the question about the circumstances around his mechanization.

When Marius finishes with some wiring of the robot and closes up a panel, Lyf changes the subject.

“So, this is your work.” They say.

“Yup. Built and designed by hand.”

“To your credit, that is impressive. I always thought you mostly composed music in your free time. Also terrorize your other crewmates. Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve woken up to yelling and singing.”

“Gotta have something to do when you’re traveling around in space for extended amounts of time. I have a couple of ones like this lying around.” He gently pats the top of the robot, where there’s a dragonfly painted onto the metal.

“Does it have a name?”

“Huh? No, I don’t think so. Would you like to name it?”

“What? Me? I-” They pause, taking a sip of water. “...How about “trollslända”?”

“Trol… What now?”

Lyf points to the painted symbol. “That’s a dragonfly, right? Trollslända means dragonfly in my language. It’s really just the first thing that came to mind.”

Marius considers this. “You know what, that sounds good to me.”

Lyf smiles slightly. God, they’re cute. They’re also looking a little better than when they came in.

“You feeling any better?”

“Hm? Oh. A little better. I think the painkillers are kicking in. Thanks for that.”

“That’s good.” He looks back to the now named robot and gets an idea. “You feel up to taking Trollslända out for a spin?”

* * *

This probably wasn’t going to end well, but at this point Lyf figured they might as well go along with it.

They’re currently hiding with Marius just outside the common room. Trollslända the sproomba (space roomba) is at their feet, pained in shades of red and black with a white dragonfly on top. It’s got a couple small spikes on the front (dulled of course) and also glued to it is a tiny, tiny hat that looks very similar to the ridiculous one they knew Marius owned. Beside them, Marius has a wireless controller for said robot in his hands.

“You know one of them are going to likely shoot it when they find it, right?” Lyf says.

“But it’ll be fun!” Marius retorts.

“Just remember this was your idea.”

“You’re the one you tagged along when I asked.”

Lyf sighs. “Still your idea.”

Marius smirks at them, and then nudges Trollslända forward into the common room using the controller. The both of them peek into the common room as Marius pilots the sproomba forward.

There’s not many people there, just Ashes, Jonny, Tim, and Toy Soldier. Three of them are sitting at a table playing some kind of game, and Toy Soldier is standing nearby playing some music with its mandolin. None of them seem to be aware of the sproomba that is being guided into the room and toward the table. Lyf watches, waiting to see what happens.

When Trollslända gets to the table, still no one has noticed. Marius then guides it purposely into one of the table legs, making an audible thud and causing the table to shake slightly and briefly.

Tim’s the first to notice. “What the hell?”

Ashes shrugs, unfazed. “Probably an octokitten.”

Jonny gets up from his seat and looks down just as Trollslända decides to run into his foot. Lyf can see him scowling at it. “The fuck are you?”

By this point, now Ashes and Tim have seen the sproomba. Toy Soldier has stopped playing the mandolin as well to get a look.

“Oh! It’s A Little Robot!” It exclaims cheerfully.

Jonny takes a step back, but Trollslända keeps running into his foot. “It’s annoying is what it is.”

Lyf smiles, amused by this. Marius is clearly making it run into Jonny’s feet on purpose, and his reaction is quite funny as he tries to step away from it. Although that quickly ends when he draws his pistol and shoots the poor sproomba. It stops moving. Lyf winces at the noise, the sudden and loud shot aggravating the remnants of their earlier headache.

“Ah, shit.” Marius quietly says from beside them.

“What did I tell you.” Lyf gently chides, though they must admit they are a bit sad to see the poor thing taken out.

“I can see you two chucklefucks over there.” Jonny calls out, making it clear he’s aware of their presence in the doorway.

Marius steps forward first, trying to look casual. Lyf follows behind and close to Marius, hoping Jonny doesn’t decide to turn his pistol on them.

“Come on, there was no need to shoot it.” Marius says, going over and picking up Trollslända. “I just got its motor functions running again. I was taking it out for a test run to make sure everything was running okay.”

“If by test run, you mean annoying the hell out of us.”

“Or mostly annoying you, Jonny.” Tim points out.

Jonny scowls at him in return. “He’s lucky the stupid robot was the only thing shot.”

“In fairness, I did warn him this might be the outcome.” Lyf repeats. Tim and Ashes chuckle nearby.

Marius and Lyf retreat from the common area and back to the medbay after that. Once they’ve returned, Marius sets Trollslända back down on the table where he had been working on it.

“Well, that was fun while it lasted.” Marius says, sadly poking Trollslända.

Lyf gets the brief thought of ‘hm, nope. don’t like that’ at seeing Marius slightly upset at his undone work, and steps forward to the table. “Maybe… Maybe I can-”

They reach forward and put their fingers to where the sproomba was shot, to get a look at the damage. They wanted to say they could try and help him fix it, even though they have no knowledge when it came to how stuff like this worked, but something else happens instead.

They fall silent and a shiver runs through their body. Their eyes flutter closed and there’s a faint hum of static in their ears. They think someone calls their name, but they’re not sure. For a moment they lose awareness, and when they come back to themselves they find the metal no longer has a bullet hole in it. There is, however, a shimmering of rainbow, though it quickly fades out. All they can do is stare, realizing what they had done.

‘ _Oh Gods, what did I just do?’_ They ask themself, trying not to panic. _‘How did I do that?’_

“I, um...” They try to string coherent words together because okay that’s new. “The, um, surface damage is fixed? I think? You’ll probably still have to… to open it up to deal with any internal issues.”

They shift their gaze to Marius, who’s looking at them just as surprised. Lyf isn’t sure what to expect from Marius, though he knew about some changes the Bifrost had caused. Still, it’s still a slight surprise to Lyf when he says, “Thanks! I didn’t know you could do that.”

“I-I didn’t either. I think it’s another, um, Bifrost thing.”

“Probably. I mean there was that weird rainbow glow before you pulled your hand away. Maybe you can alter objects now?”

“Maybe? Okay. Yeah, that’s...” They don’t know how to respond to this new development; how to feel about it. They try to pull together some sense of composure. “I… wasn’t expecting that; more Bifrost weirdness I mean. Or, I guess I should have.”

“In any case,” Marius says before Lyf can let that line of thought spiral. “Whatever you did does look to have fixed where the bullet hole was. I’ll take a look, but who knows- maybe you fixed the whole thing!”

“You’re welcome… I think.” The response may be muttered, but it’s the way in which Marius is looking at them now that reaches further. He looks at them like nothing’s changed; his smile as warm as the sun. It’s beautiful. It makes them feel better. “May I suggest you not try and annoy Jonny with it again?”

In the back of their mind however, there’s a thought nagging at them. Lyf was aware they had changed physically, but now with this... It just confirms there’s still more to come.

* * *

Poems and prose about a certain someone have started to appear more regularly alongside their usual writings. Lyf has used this method before to cope with everything that had happened, as how the Bifrost has transformed them. And now they were using the written word to try and sort their feelings; the affection they realized they held for Marius. It wasn’t the first time they’ve written about him, but they’re writing about him a lot more now.

They think back to yesterday, when they had “fixed” one of Marius’s robots after Jonny shot it. Lyf hadn’t been expecting that to happen. However, they hadn’t expected Marius to smile at them like that eithr. He _thanked_ them for somewhat fixing the robot with whatever this new ability was. Lyf knew that they had no reason to worry about how the crew would react to how they were changing. In fact, they would be the most understanding of the circumstances, ironically enough. But there was still that part of them that whispered doubt. They wanted to believe they’d found a place here with the Mechanisms.

(especially with Marius)

The sound of a meow makes Lyf set their book and pen down. Their octokitten, Sigrid, is also in the room with them, though it sounds like she’s trying to rummage through something. Lyf looks over the side of their bed, seeing one of Sigrid’s tentacles poking out from under the bed.

They get out of bed and kneel down to see her. “What are you doing, Sigrid?”

Her eyes shine at them all innocent like and she meows again. Lyf chuckles and gently drags her out from under the bed. It looks like she’s got something in her grasp, but they can’t tell what. Maybe one of their scarves somehow ended up under there.

Their smile falters when they see what she’s gotten a hold of; the Black Box.

Though they kept the cube on the grounds that, outside of the album the Mechs were making, it was the last remaining record of what led to Yggdrasil’s destruction, it still made them shudder. It had been the only intact artifact from the train; given to Lyf to investigate. Too corrupted at first, but then fixed by Ivy, and then- then they’d seen it all- _The recordings are clear now. I can see everything._

Lyf takes a breath and carefully removes the Black Box from Sigrid’s grasp. “Don’t mess around with that. Gods know that thing gave me enough trouble before I found out my world was to be devoured by an unknown force of cosmic madness.”

Once they’ve got it in their hands, they look it over; observing the slight shimmer of color against its smooth black surface. If they didn’t know any better, they might have called the shimmers captivating. It’s mostly just a reminder now; of the things they saw. Of what happened. Of the colors they see in their dreams and the static they hear when they wake; with a scream on their lips and feeling sick to their stomach.

And they would silently cry, plead for it to stop, even when it follows them into the waking world-

Lyf narrows their eyes at the Black Box, silently cursing it and the Bifrost for what they had become. They toss the cube to the side in frustration. It doesn’t reply, of course; it just sits there faintly emitting a prismatic glow. Stupid thing. If only Lyf had realized what was hidden in it sooner, if they had been faster-

“Should have just left you on Midgard.” They mutter, reaching over to pick it up. They’ll seal it in a box and back under their bed for now. They can consider getting rid of it once the Mechs finish their new story (as long as it doesn’t summon any more Outer Gods).

* * *

With the development of being able to alter objects around them, as well as their surroundings, Lyf’s taken to commandeering an empty storage room. There’s some crates around they can… practice on; figure out the reach of whatever this new ability was and exactly what they could do with it.

So far what they’ve been able to determine is- yes, they can alter objects. Fixing the metal of the sproomba was one thing, and when they tried to recreate the results… well… the first attempt they tried to force it and ended up with a terrible pins and needles sensation in their hand and a broken crate, the pieces shimmering with rainbows. After a few more attempts they had a more reasonable idea of how it worked. It made them feel strange every time they used it though; they weren’t used to this.

They also noted that half the time it could be downright unstable, which led to them realize they could also manipulate their surroundings; mostly warp things slightly, though they had somehow caused a crate to half melt into rainbow goo once.

Lyf continues on regardless of how much it unsettles them. They need to be aware of what the Bifrost is doing to them; how it’s changing them. To understand what they are now, and how far they’ve slipped away from who they once were.

A few days into their exploration of their abilities, they’re trying an experiment of breaking apart a few crates and rearranging the pieces back into abstract forms, though it mostly leaves the crates stained with rainbows. Breaking apart another crate goes off with a flash, and that’s when they hear someone enter the storage room.

“Thought that was you.” Lyf hears Marius say. “Saw the flash of color from the hall.”

They turn and see Marius leaning against the doorway to the storage room. “You know any other rainbow monstrosities?”

“I mean, you _are_ the only one here that’s had a brush with an Outer God that also dyed your hair rainbow and left you with glowy abilities.”

Lyf sighs and sits down in front of their half fragmented/slightly melted crate. They hear Marius walk over and sit down beside them.

“What’s up with this?” He asked.

“An attempt to figure out how this stupid altering objects and surroundings thing works. I kind of understand it better now, but it’s still… It’s still weird.” They look over at him. “It doesn’t feel right.”

“I get that. I had similar feelings when this was first installed.” Marius holds up his metal arm. “I was caught between a weird state of “I have my arm back, I have feeling in it” and “something about this feels wrong”. The whole mechanization thing was weird in general.”

“Guess we have that in common.”

They probably meant the trauma bit, but they weren’t wrong. He had grown up in a war torn world, much like Lyf did (admitted in the one time they talked about it), so there was a bit of truth there.

“Not the mechanization, but just the experience in becoming something that you’re…” They pause, fidgeting with their ring. “...Does it ever get easier?”

“What does?”

“Living with who you’ve become. I’m trying to understand it, live with it- I kinda have to now- but I don’t- it still comes down to the fact that I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to _be this_.”

Marius looks to be considering their question. “...You’ll get a different answer depending on who you ask. For me- I don’t really think it truly leaves you, and that’s probably the trauma. It’s a bit easier for me now, but that’s because I’ve been alive for centuries. Gives you plenty of time to think. To answer your question, I think in time you learn to live with it, and you learn how to be as you are now. But you never forget it either. Does that help?”

It does, more than he knows. Lyf does not say this.

They do say, “Sort of. Thank you.”

“So… what exactly can you do with this new trick of yours?” Marius continues. “Just alter objects and surroundings?”

Lyf shrugs. “As far as I know. I haven’t tried to apply it in any other way other than apparently making weird vent art.”

“Not thinking about ways you could prank people?” Lyf wasn’t amused by this. “Okay, well what about way you could use this in a fight? Defensive methods? If you could figure that out, you could come along with us for some fun next time we stop somewhere! We do like to cause trouble wherever possible.”

“Your definition of fun is copious amounts of crime and violence.”

“Exactly! Now, did they ever teach you how to fight when you were with the transport division?”

“I was taught some things here and there, though I never saw much action with the transport division.” They respond. “But I know how to defend myself, thank you very much.”

“Great!” Marius stands and hold out a hand to Lyf. They take it and get themself to their feet. “What I’m suggesting is that you could figure out a way to be able to use your abilities in a fight, should you need to and your weapons aren’t quite enough.”

Admittedly, Marius does have a point. While Lyf’s slowly moved over to “this might as well happen” in regards to whatever it is the Mechanisms get up to, and Tim may be advising them as far as weapons training goes, but maybe learning how to use their abilities for defensive/combat methods might be useful. It’d be something productive for them to do with it.

“I guess I could give something like that a try.” They relent.

“That’s the spirit!” Marius cheers. “Let’s get to work!”

“Wait, _now_? And you talk as if you want in on this.”

“I’ve got nothing better to be doing. I could be your sparing partner! And we’re still a few months out from the nearest habitable place where we can go have some real fun. Murder hide and seek only gets you so far out here.”

“Er… right." One of the crew’s “games”, and one Lyf avoided getting involved with for obvious reasons.

The two spent the next ten minutes discussing ways in which Lyf’s new abilities could be utilized. They settled on jut starting with Lyf trying for defensive measures, building upon what they had learned from their prior training. Lyf did insist that no live weaponry be involved though, mainly for purposes of not getting shot.

What was settled upon instead was to get two wooden swords- Toy Solider eagerly provided a pair for use when asked- and use the sparing practice to draw out Lyf’s abilities, to use as defense for the time being.

“You know how to use this, right?” Marius asks them, twirling his prop sword around… and dropping it in the process.

“Do you?” Lyf quips back.

Marius picks the prop off the ground and smirks at Lyf. There’s a bit of a wild look in his eyes. “You’ve never seen me in a fight, Lyfrassir.”

They return his expression as a challenge. “I’ve withstood you and your antics for several years. I can take it.”

“We’ll see. You know, I’ve always wanted to see how you do in a fight.”

“Then what are you waiting for?”

Marius steps forward and makes his first move, swinging his prop in their direction. Idly and not with any real force. Lyf blocks the movement with their own easily. He tries again, and that’s when it begins.

Their movements quickly fall into a pattern; Marius on the offensive, quick jabs making Lyf go on the defensive. Obviously the point was to provoke their abilities into reacting, but Lyf still tried to get a hit in on Marius. He was just as easily blocking Lyf when they tried. Admittedly, he does seem to know what he’s doing, though Lyf got the feeling he was holding back a little. However, they were more preoccupied by blocking him every time he swung than focus on that detail.

Lyf takes another swipe at Marius, but he quickly moves out of the way, sneaks behind Lyf, and pokes them in the back. Lyf turns, but Marius moves away again.

“Come on, Lyf. Get creative!” He goads.

They purse their lips and tightens their grip on their sword. Another attack, another block, Marius comes in to take aim at them again and-

There’s a spark of rainbow when the swords make contact, making both Lyf and Marius freeze. After a moment, Lyf takes a step back, readjusting their grip. They notice their prop has started to take on more color.

“There- that’s it!” Marius cheers. “Now see if you can block me with it or try to knock my weapon away!”

They swallow down the worry and try to focus.

He’s moved closer again by the time they look away from the color and bring their prop up again to block, but pushing back with enough force to make it slip from his grasp, accompanied by another flash of rainbow light. His prop falls to the ground, rainbow shimmers rippling across it. Lyf feels a faint sensation like a cold wave washing over them. They feel the Bifrost flow.

Marius doesn’t seem phased by this. He tries to disarm Lyf, but they easily out maneuver him and push him away. He retrieves the fallen prop, steps to the side and gets up on one of the nearby crates. He’s grinning wildly.

“I have the high ground, Lyf!”

Lyf is just not having it and focuses in on the crate he’s perched upon, making it collapse in on itself into rainbow pieces and making Marius crash to the ground. They wince at the sound of pain he makes, but still steps toward him. He smiles up at them from the floor and holds his metal hand up to grab.

They roll their eyes, set down the sword they were using, and grab onto his arm, helping him up. However, as they pull him to his feet they put more pressure on his arm than they intended.

“Nice one-” Marius starts, which quickly switches to, “Hey! Ow! Ow! Lyf! Lyf, I still have feeling in that arm, remember?”

They let go, stepping back. They can see rainbow marks on the metal of his arm, ones he’s now observing even when his face shows his arm still hurts from where Lyf gripped it. They clamped down so hard it almost felt like the metal shifted under their grasp- Oh Gods, they hurt him.

That’s the coherent thought in their mind as their power ebbs away and back into them. They hadn’t considered how their new abilities could react in living beings. They know Marius cannot truly die, but Lyf knows they could have seriously hurt him with whatever that power was; that energy that slipped out of them. They could have done more than twist his arm. They’ve seen what the Bifrost can do, they saw what happened to those on the train that were exposed to its madness. The thought alone makes their head spin.

Marius composes himself, moves his arm around, flexes his hand, and then turn back to Lyf. His mechanism must have dealt with it already. “Lyf?”

They hear him, but are frozen. They still see those twisted forms from the recordings in their mind.

Marius takes a step toward them, carefully reaching out and touching their arm.

The contact snaps Lyf out of their trance. Slowly, they look up at Marius. He’s fine; he’s here and not corrupted like those forms.

“I… I didn’t mean-” They try.

“It’s okay. I’m fine.” He says, as if it’s nothing. They feel his thumb slowly rub up and down on their arm, as if in comfort or further reassurance. Lyf almost wants to lean into his touch; it’s nice. Instead they just stand there, soaking it in. Marius is fine, they’re fine, kinda- everything’s okay.

“I was worried about this. I hadn’t considered how it might affect others around me, and the last thing I want to do is hurt someone.”

“Lyf, I know for a fact you punched someone for insulting those who fought in the revolution against Asgard and talking about Odin.”

“Marius, that’s- You know what I mean! This… This stupid Bifrost. I’ve seen what it’s done.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” Marius draws his hand back, and offers, “You wanna sit down and not think about weird Bifrost stuff? Preferably somewhere with some couches?”

Lyf just nods. They kinda done messing around with these stupid Bifrost powers for today.

* * *

They moment they get into the common area, Lyf heads toward a couch and flops down on top of it. Marius watches them for a moment before they sit up, grab one of the couch cushions and hug it to their chest; closing their eyes and letting out a long breath.

Marius approaches them, sitting down next to them on the other side of the couch.

“What you doing there? Some breathing exercises?”

Lyf opens their eyes and looks at him with an expression of “really?”. “I’m trying to relax. Sometimes if I push hard enough on… whatever this energy is inside me, I’ve found it leaves me feeling, hm- I guess strange is the closest word I can put to it.”

“In what way?”

“Mostly cold. But sometimes I get a bad pins and needles sensation up my hands and arms. Sometimes I get tired, or it just gives me a headache. Like I said. I’ve been trying to get a handle on this, but sometimes it’s- it overwhelms me. Physically anyway.”

Marius looks them over briefly. “You look fine from my perspective, in my medical opinion. You feeling any of those symptoms now?”

“Little bit of a chill, but that usually happens, I’ve found. Rather, that happens frequently outside of this instance. Me and Nastya seem to have that in common now. Wait, “your medical opinion”? You’re not really a doctor.”

He dramatically puts a hand to his chest, as if wounded. “Why, Lyfrassir- I _am_ this ship’s medic!”

“Says the guy who actually has more experience as a pilot.”

“Say what you like but I know at least _some_ base line medical knowledge. Kinda had to learn to look out for myself where I came from. I wasn’t always the handsome, dashing doctor you know today.”

“Man of mystery.” They muse.

“One day I’ll tell my story; Just you wait.” He gives them an exaggerated wink. “It’s not ready yet, is all. I wouldn’t mind telling it to you first though.”

Lyf gives a slight smile, but only for a moment. They waver and shut their eyes, letting out a shaky breath.

Marius places a hand on their arm. “You good?”

They open their eyes. There’s a flash of color in the silver for a moment. “Dizzy… Whenever I’ve used these abilities as well, it’s always seemed to take a bit of my energy.”

“You must not be used to it yet. Lay back for a bit, just till the dizziness passes.”

They did as told, leaning back against the back of the couch and tilting their head back. They were a bit shaky on the walk over here, but they’re far more at ease now. Marius kinda wants to pull them over and have them lay their head in his lap; smooth their hair back and away from their eyes.

He moves a bit closer to them on the couch, which Lyf does notice. They tilt their head to the side and the light catches the rainbow shine in the bangs of their hair. He thinks back to earlier, to when they were pretending to fight each other and Lyf’s powers started to creep out. Their prop sword had taken on a rainbow sheen, the veins in their hands lit up as well, and there had been a bit of a glow in their eyes. Even the tattoo on their wrist seemed to have taken on a similar light.

It’d been pretty cool, actually. At least in his opinion. He knew Lyf would protest to that comment if he said it, and they wouldn’t be wrong to do so. Cool as just that little hint of it was, Marius knew it was some strange kind of energy that neither himself or Lyf understood, outside of it being a mark of what destroyed Lyf’s world.

Like how his arm was a constant reminder of his immortality. Of what he went through when he was still mortal. He runs the fingers of his flesh hand over the metal, remembering how amazing he thought it was at first, but soon after learned the truth of what it was.

Lyf shifts on the couch, moving so that they’re still leaning against the back of the couch, but angled so they’re facing him.

“What are you thinking about?” They ask.

He’s tempted to say something stupid along the lines of “just you” (which is not entirely untrue), but he’s not really feeling it. “Nothing for you to worry your pretty little head about.”

“Is your arm bothering you? I know it’s your mechanism. Are you sure I didn’t damage it earlier?”

He laughs. “No, no, you didn’t. Trust me, this thing’s all good. I guess I was reminiscing, thinking about what you’re going through. It sort of reminds me of my own past.”

“Did wherever you came from get destroyed too?”

“No… It’s...” But he trails off, the memory of his arm being twisted and crushed coming to mind once more. There are other things he remembers too, things he doesn’t like to think about. He frowns, and curls his metal hand into a fist, as if testing the mobility of it.

Lyf nods. “We never- in the time I’ve known you we never really- Your past never really came up. Just your music, various crimes you’ve committed with your crew, anything you had to offer for cases I was working on, trying to convince me to quit my job, and so on. It never crossed my mind what might have come before.”

“In fairness there was nothing really to discuss. We were waiting for the train, trying to get all the details. Plus I was having too much fun where you were concerned.”

“Hmph. You always wanted to know more about me when you weren’t actively trying to annoy me or I wasn’t asking you for any input on a case.”

Silence passed between them and Marius looks back down at his metal hand again. No, nothing like that ever really came up in conversation. Why would it? When he had first met Lyf, they only knew him as he liked to introduce himself; Baron Doctor Marius von Raum. But there was a story behind the name.

“...I did, you know- want to be a doctor.” He says, letting his hand relax again. “Really. And I tried, but, you see, things didn’t work out that way. Eventually I found I had a knack for machines. So I ended up messing around with a couple old mechas, and next thing I know I’m a pilot. I was pretty good at it too, but of course then I went and got involved in a larger conflict because of it.”

“Does this have to do with how you got the metal arm?”

“Well… yeah. Things happened, and I kinda got myself into a bad situation. My arm got crushed. I met Carmilla around that time, and… then _this_ happened. A lot of what happened after is… kinda hazy; it’s not something I like trying to remember. I ended up getting away from Carmilla after finding files on her other mechanization efforts, and then wandering around for a while trying to deal with my newfound immortality, until I met Raphaella. Eventually we found our way to the _Aurora,_ _a_ nd I found out this crew had no doctor, so… I took the position with no complaints.”

Lyf’s been watching him quietly, still holding the couch cushion to their chest.

“...That’s your story.” They say after a long moment.

He sighs. “In summary, yeah. Still working on it, but that’s the gist. Sorry to kinda go off on that train of thought.”

Lyf looks back at him with understanding. “No, it’s alright. It’s better than thinking about the Bifrost or Yggdrasil. It still scares me, because while I may be learning how to use it, it’s an unknown.”

Marius thinks back to what they said back in the storage room, saying they didn’t know how to be how they were now…

(Marius can relate. Probably most of the Mechs could, but still.)

“Anyway, the longer I stay here, the more I learn about you all.” They continue. “If I had asked back on Midgard, if I had taken the time to-”

“Probably wouldn’t of told you a thing. You were still a cop back then.”

“I was an _Inspector_ , but I know what you’re trying to say. You had every right not to disclose any of that information to me at the time. Why would you?”

“I did notice though- all three of us did- that you were more… human than the rest.” He pauses. “Is that the right word for it? I mean, I think your biology is a bit different? Was it a different word on Midgard?”

A smile tugs at the corner of Lyf’s lips. “I understand what you mean. Despite whatever our relationship was back then, despite how much you and the others infuriated me, you were still a person. And when I was assigned to you, I was resolved to do it right. I was resolved to do everything right and by the book.” They pause and give the tiniest scoff. “No wonder they always called me “No Fun Edda”.”

“Sounds like you alright. Always playing by the rules.”

“Ha. Sure. And now I live with immortal space pirates that thrive on crime and violence.”

“An upgrade!”

To his surprise, Lyf laughs at this; a true laugh that’s music to Marius’s ears. He’s always loved Lyf’s laugh and it was such a rare sight. Once they calm down, their expression turns somber.

“You’re all stressful, and nonsensical, but… you’ve all surprised me at the same time. You all have a story; you all have known pain. That much I’ve learned.”

Lyf’s not wrong. He too has a story, and his past is full of pain. Those were grim times back then, even in the brightest moments when he felt like he was doing good.

“I’ll tell you that story sometime; in full.” He says. “Not just the fragments I’ve given you. I’ll tell you when it’s ready.”

“Whenever you’re ready to tell it.” Lyf rephrases.

He will, in time. Maybe there will be a day when he could get the both of them drunk and he could just lay here with Lyf; exchanging stories that were lost in the past. He knew Lyf had been born after the Midgardian Revolution (the former inspector practically had the history of the event memorized), and there were tales untold from that time that Lyf had only let him in on once. But maybe that was something that could happen while they were still here. They would tell their story… and he’d tell them his.

Yeah, maybe one of these days… though for now he’s quite content with getting lost in Lyf’ silver starlight eyes. They always had pretty eyes, even before they turned silver.

His phone buzzes in his pocket, distracting him from his current thoughts about Lyf, and he takes it out to see who’s bothering him now. There’s a message from Brian...

“Ah, shit.” He pockets his phone and gets up. “I gotta go. Brian’s done something to one of his legs and wants me to help him out because apparently Nastya’s busy. Probably having some “quality time” with her girlfriend.”

“Oh.” They sit up on the couch. “Don’t your mechanisms take care of any injury?”

“They do, but the irony is from time to time they still need maintenance. Me, Brian, and Nastya have worked on the crew’s mechanisms when needed, mostly depending on who’s available and who needs fixing. But, Jonny’s pretty picky when it comes to him; he’ll only let Nastya or Brian work on his heart. And in Brian’s case, his whole body is metal except for his heart, so sometimes he’ll ask me or Nastya for assistance.”

“So everything except for his heart-” Realization crosses their face. “Ah. I see. Raphaella told me some mechanisms were more visible than others, but nearly his whole body? That must get complicated.”

“Raph’s done extensive studies into how our mechanisms operate if you’re ever curious.”

Lyf hums. “I’ll… keep that in mind. On that note though, I think I’ll head over to the library. I told Ivy I’d stop by sometime today.”

“Oh, right. You’re working on that thing about Yggdrasil with her.”

“We are making a _collective history_ about Yggdrasil, to be exact.”

“Okay, yeah. Collective history. You guys are nerds.”

Lyf gets up from the couch, crossing their arms. “We both happen to be interested in my formerly existing star system’s history.”

Marius smirks and leans toward them. “For Ivy, that’s a given. You- I know for a fact you’ve memorized the timeline of the Midgardian Revolution.”

They pout at him, and Marius realizes they’re both standing rather close to each other. He can observe the details of their face; the furrow in their brow, their cute little nose that he could reach out and poke if he wanted, how there was a bit of their hair tucked behind one of their slightly pointed ears, their eyes- how it looks like there’s tiny bits of color in the silver if the light catches it right. Theirs is a face he’s spent far too much time trying to memorize.

But he also realizes he’s staring and steps back, clearing his throat and looking away as he does so. If Lyf reacts, he does not see it.

“I, uh- I’ll see you later…? At some point?” He tries, composing himself and looking back up to them.

Lyf still stands where they are, arms still crossed, but not looking annoyed. “When we next run into each other.”

“Yeah. Yeah, sure. Um, I probably shouldn’t keep Brian waiting, so I’ll just…”

He trails off, but Lyf nods anyway, so Marius takes his leave, stepping around Lyf and toward the door. He does though, pause and give them a dramatic bow. Lyf sighs and rolls their eyes.

* * *

“Remind me why I’m doing this again?” Marius asks as he works on one of Brian’s legs. Looks like he’s twisted up his leg somehow. A couple of clusters that serve as tendons look stressed as well. “And while you’re at it, how did you manage this?”

Brian looks down at him from his chair. “Because I tripped over an octokitten, Nastya is busy, and trying to conduct maintenance on oneself can get tricky depending on what you’re doing.”

He had a point.

“You’re lucky I used to work with mechas.” Marius moves on to checking on the joints. Make sure there’s nothing wrong there. “This is obviously a bit different, but I can work with this. Don’t suppose you need me to double check the navigation to make sure we’re actually on course while I’m here?”

“That probably won’t be necessary. Nothing’s changed in our trajectory.”

“Great! That means the sooner I get to make my debut as Thor in our new album!”

“I’m not too surprised you wanted that role. That reminds me, how’s Lyfrassir doing?”

Marius stopped what he was doing and glances up at Brian. “About as well as they can with, you know, everything.”

“Hm, I can imagine. Lyf comes by sometimes, and we talk. There always seems to be a lot weighing on them. Have you talked to them at all? Recently, I mean. They always seem to brighten up when you’re mentioned.”

“Ha. You sure they just aren’t complaining about me? Or telling you about how I apparently always made a lot of paperwork for them whenever we broke out of our cell?”

“There was some of that now that you mention it.”

Marius ignores the response and gets back to work on Brian’s leg. “We talk, a lot more than we used to back on Midgard. Kinda. I’d known Lyf for about eight years when the train came crashing onto the planet and cracking the Bifrost wide open. There were plenty of times we talked, but they usually only stopped by when they needed something, and even then it was mostly work related.”

“And now?” Brian prompts.

“It feels like we do have more conversations with each other, but I mean, we live on the same ship now, so we see each other a lot more. They seem a bit more… open? Which they rarely were before.”

“That’s a good thing, isn’t it? I know you’re very fond of Lyfrassir.”

Ah, so that’s where Brian was going with this.

“Can we not talk about that?” Marius insists. “You’re not getting anything to use as gossip.”

Brian casts him a skeptical look. “Firstly, I’m not on EJM. Secondly, you’ll have to face this eventually. You know Lyfrassir is mortal, and mortals don’t tend to last very long with us.”

He tries not to show how much that fills him with dread. He’s just not going to think about that. Nope.

“Look, I’m really happy Lyf’s here with us, even if they are eldritch now. And that’s fine. If they need someone to lean on while they deal with their grief and eldritch changes, sure. But I really don’t think- there’s no way they’d feel the same for me. It’s fine, really.”

“Whatever you say, but I don’t think they regard you the same way as before, at least from how they talk about you. And you should stop repressing your feelings.”

“Hey, I’m not Jonny.” He says, trying to brush this conversation away.

“No, but the point remains.”

Marius shakes his head dismissively and steers the conversation away from Lyf. Once he gets done sort out the problems with Brian’s leg, telling him to take it easy for a bit, (and warning him not to trip over any more octokittens), he heads off to do… he doesn’t know. Something. Anything.

He could always go bug Lyf, but Ivy doesn’t like many people poking around the library unless she let you. Or if you were Raphaella or Lyf… or the octokittens. She likes the creepy pests for some reason. He supposed if he was really bored enough he could read one of the medical text books he snagged from Ivy, which come to think of it, he could ask if she managed to get any textbooks on Midgardian physiology before they left the planet. With an actual mortal living with the crew now, it might be useful to know these things. She’d probably forward any relevant files to him should he ask.

Okay, yeah, maybe that was a good idea. It’d give him something to do. He has a database of relevant medical files related to each member of the crew, and with Lyf sort of a part of that now, he should add them. He sends a text to Ivy (and one to Raphaella since she is keeping track of Lyf’s changes via the Bifrost for her own research) and heads off to the medbay. Marius may not technically be a doctor, but he does try to be one… like he wanted to be once upon a time.

He knows Raphaella suggested Lyf might have some sort of regeneration that led to a very interesting theory, but he should have this information just in case. Lyf’s still mortal.

And that… kinda makes him sad, because there’s the traitorous thought that Lyf won’t be here forever.

Marius pushes that thought away. Lyf is here now, they didn’t die in the Bifrost, and honestly, he doesn’t care about the mortal bit or about them being an eldritch being now. Rather, he’s gonna ignore it and enjoy it while he can. There’s time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am fully aware about the upcoming marius backstory album, but you know, that's not gonna stop me from having my own thoughts on the matter (to maybe be expanded upon later?? idk).
> 
> I'll have the next chapter up when I can (part two to this chapter), but thank you for sticking with this ^^;


	8. Breathe A Little Deeper (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Music, nightmares, star charts, and eldritch powers going slightly out of control. Also more pinning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title once again from Breathe Deeper, by Tame Impala.
> 
> Similar to chapter 6, in the latter half of his chapter, Lyf is not having a good time; starting from "Lyf follows the music to an open door nearby and steps in". Also warning for a emetophobia mention that's brief, though not greatly described.

One thing that was shared among the members of the Mechanisms was their habit of expressing their various traumas through song. Most of them had a backstory song of how they came to be as they were now, though Jonny’s was still a bit fuzzy on the fact he once claimed he made it all up for “narrative purposes”. Nastya was the only one who probably truly knew, and wasn’t giving up that story any time soon.

Marius, for his part, had not written a song recounting his time before his mechanization, but he was working on it. He just… had a lot to say about it, and looking back on his life before was never a good time; full of war and tragedy. He and Tim had that in common at least.

Recently the crew had decided to formally integrate Lyf into the band. It was something they had discussed before, considered ever since they were brought onto the ship. They’d wait to do Lyf’s formal introduction till after the first run of the new album, since they asked not to be involved with that set for personal reasons, but they would be on cello. When the decision was brought up to Lyf over breakfast, they were also asked if they had a backstory song they wanted to preform. All Lyf did was shake their head and decline the offer for the backstory song.

Lyf wouldn’t have been the first not to give one. Marius had never given them his story, and Raph still hasn’t (he knows her story though). So everyone just shrugs and lets it go; the offer would always be there.

It doesn’t cross his mind again until he’s hanging out with Lyf one evening. They’re writing something, probably more poetry, and he’s working on his story, occasionally trying a melody or two on his violin. Marius had always figured them to secretly be a poet, or at least be interested in the subject. Up until Lyf came aboard, he’d never seen them write poetry, though they said they were mostly writing now as a form of comfort and venting.

Marius looks over at Lyf. “Ever think about turning your poetry into song?”

Lyf looks up from their notebook, raising a brow at him. “What?”

“Turn your poetry into song.” He repeats, followed by playing a single note on his violin.

They frown. “Is this about the whole “backstory song” thing now that I’m part of the band?”

“Writing music to deal with our traumas is a common thing to do around here, not just write about the stories we happen to stumble across.”

Lyf shakes their head and returns their gaze to their notebook. “I already said I don’t feel like making a “backstory song”; not now anyway.”

“And that’s fine. I’m just saying, I know you write your poetry to help cope with all this stuff that’s happened to you; music’s another avenue of doing so. You might wanna practice before your debut show anyway.”

“You’ll all still wait till after you do your show for your new album, right? You know I don’t want to be a part of that, considering it’s, you know, the story of what led to the destruction of everything I knew and left me like this.”

“Oh yeah, of course. We’re not gonna make you relive that. There’s some other songs we can run with you instead. You’ll still need to learn them though.”

Lyf makes a noise seeming to acknowledge this fact, but not saying anything further. Marius takes this as a sign their conversation is done and returns to his own musical musings. He continues with this, but then he sneaks a glance at Lyf and begins to sketch them in his own notebook, in a blank space near a block of text and a drawing of a robot. It’s not a very good rendering of them, but it’s just a sketch anyway.

A few more minutes pass, with Marius taking a few more glances at Lyf. It’s as he looks over to them again, just so he can make sure he’s getting the angle of their head right, that he sees Lyf is now looking right at him. Not expecting this, he startles a little, dropping his pen.

“Ah- Y-Yes?” He quickly says, flashing them a smile.

Lyf looks temporarily confused by his reaction, but continues on. “I was thinking, about the music thing… There wouldn’t happen to be a cello lying around with all the other instruments, would there?”

“There would! It hasn’t been used in… a long, long time, but I’m sure with a good tuning it’d be ready for use again.”

“Well then, I might as well take a look at it if I am to be your band’s celloist, especially if it hasn’t been used in a while. Can you show it to me?”

* * *

The cello has a bit more dust on it than he was expecting when he pulls the case out and opens it. It’s still in one piece, but it definitely looks like it hasn’t been used in a while.

“Looks like it needs a little more than tuning.” Lyf comments.

“It probably still works.” Marius tries to assure them, looking over the instrument. “Supposedly, the last person to play cello was before I got here; someone by the name of Scuzz, who was also a ninja! Back to the cello though- it just needs the touch of someone who knows how to use it.”

“Meaning me.”

“Who else?”

Holding onto the neck, he leans the cello toward Lyf. They take it from him, dragging it closer and inspecting it.

“It certainly has some wear, but it’s not badly damaged.” Lyf concludes. “It should be cleaned before use; dusted, polished. I’d also like the strings to be replaced, and then a tuning. I’ll need to inspect the bow as well.”

“I think there’s some stuff around here to help with that.” Okay, now Marius is curious about Lyf playing cello again. “How long have you known how to play cello?”

Lyf runs their fingers along the old strings, almost reverently, before answering. “Since I was a child. My mothers took notice that I had an interest in music and poetry from a young age, and my mum, Vilja, who was a musician, got me a cello. She… she taught me how to play. I...”

There’s a waver in Lyf’s voice and Marius looks to Lyf to find them glancing down sadly at the cello. They look a little lost for words; struggling to find them. He remembers that losing their entire world- the entirety of the Yggdrasil system- also included losing their family. Last of Yggdrasil and last of the Eddas. They hadn’t spoken much of their family before, but Marius could tell they had loved their family deeply.

“I get having a personal connection to one’s instrument. You’ve never seen it, but I keep my original violin from way back way here on the ship. It’s had to undergo maintenance many times, but it’s here. I usually only break it out when I’m working on my own stuff.”

“What about all the other violins, like the ones I took from you.”

Marius grins at them. “I like collecting violins.”

“Of course you do.” Lyf deadpans. “And… And the significance of this one you keep here?”

His smile falters. “...I’ve had it through hard times, so it kinda means a lot to me. So much I carried it off a battlefield once.”

“Oh.”

Yeah. The violin he could never bring himself to let go of, even after- when he was still mortal- he could no longer play it. When he left that planet, that violin was one of the only few possessions he carried. He’s had the same violin through the good times and bad.

He shakes off that thought and says something more light-hearted to Lyf. “Hey, I’m sure Vilja would be glad you’re continuing to play. Shame I never got to hear you play it back on Midgard.”

They meet his eyes, finding their voice once more. “Suppose you will now, seeing as the others want me to be in the band. When I took my job with the transport police, I stopped playing for a while, but now… Hm… It will be good to play again.”

“Awesome! You’ll do just fine, with a bit of practice of course!”

“Right, I need to learn your crew’s songs.” Lyf recalls. “Where to start...”

“Probably a bit too early to figure out if we’d be playing a certain set, but you could start with some of our miscellaneous songs; the random ones we throw into shows sometimes. How about our intro-”

“No.”

“You’ll have to learn it at some point if you’re to be part of the band!” Marius insists. Oh the irony of the one song they hated now being one they would probably have to learn. Or maybe not. Not everyone played during that; they mostly vibed while Jonny did his thing. “In any case, I think there’s some sheet music around here.”

Marius leaves Lyf to the cello and goes to look for sheet music. There’s some kept around for practice reasons, sorted by story, and then the miscellaneous ones in a separate folder. They don’t always stay organized, however, no matter how many times Ivy reorganizes them. After a few more minutes of searching around, he does find some to give to Lyf.

Lyf frowns when they are handed the sheet music. “Marius, this is for a violin.”

“What?” He takes the sheet music back and looks it over. “Oh. So it is. Though, you could always learn how to play violin.”

“I already play cello.” They retort.

“I know, but a violin isn’t that far off, and it’d just be until we can get you some songs transcribed into sheet music for the cello.”

“They’re two separate instruments. Also both you and Nastya play violin. There’s no need to have me as a third.”

“Aw, but it’d be fun. We could play violin duets! Or you, me, and Nastya could play something together. But, ah… you’ll take the cello? We can always get you another one next time we’re planetside.”

Lyf looks over the cello again. “...I’ll have to do some work on this, but it’ll do for now.”

“Fantastic!” Marius exclaims. “This is so exciting. Soon you’ll be preforming with us! I’m so happy to see you’re one step closer to embracing the life of a Mechanism.”

“You were all insistent I join the band.” They point out. “But it’s not the worst thing to happen.”

“Definitely not. And think about what I said about using music to help you out when you’re not feeling so great.”

“I will.”

“Oh, that reminds me. When are we gonna start writing songs together?”

That got him an exasperated look from Lyf and them giving him a light bonk on the head with the cello’s bow.

* * *

It took them the better part of a day, but they’re able to get the cello back in working order. Marius had been helpful in lending them some supplies, and even Nastya had pitched in when she caught word about Lyf’s efforts.

They haven’t practiced with the rest of the crew at all yet, but they still keep the cello in the practice room (with a note on it saying “Lyfrassir’s cello. Do not touch.”) and sneak in from time to time when there’s no one around. They had actually taken Marius’s suggestion about writing out their feelings about everything that had happened to them into song and had started to turn one of their poems into an actual song.

That’s why they’ve come over here today; tired and feeling restless as they are. They didn’t have a good rest last night and they’re feeling in a low mood. It’s thoughts on all they’ve lost and, once again, remembering they are the last living person of the Yggdrasil system. That does feed back into the fact that they have been marked by the Bifrost and have been changed by it, the thing that took everything from them, which is really not what they wanted. They don’t feel in the mood for writing, unfortunately, but they remember they have their cello now. If music worked for the Mechs when they’re weren’t resorting to violence as a coping method…

They take the cello out of its case and sit down in a chair, preforming a quick tuning. When that’s done, they open their notebook they brought with them and turn to the poem they had decided to turn into song. They were just working out melodies for it now; trying some ideas here and there. So, for a little while, that’s what Lyf does. They work on their song, which sounds sad with what they have put together so far. It wasn’t as if the poem they were working off was a happy one. Quite a few things they’ve written with a similar subject matter are not... good things.

They play out another few notes, a fragmented piece, before pausing and giving a sigh. They set down the bow for a moment and lean against the cello. They intend for this piece to sound solemn, to reflect how they felt when they wrote the poem they’re working off. A recollection; longing for a place they’d never be able to get back. Far from home and knowing they can’t go back. Still, doesn’t mean they’ve stopped feeling the way they did when they wrote it in the first place.

Picking up the bow again, they play back through a portion of their song. It sounds good now that they’ve got this bit figured out, even if it’s not supposed to be the brightest of songs.

They keep playing until they hear the sound of the door opening. They stop and look up, somehow not surprised to see Marius looking in through the doorway.

“Yes?” Lyf inquires. Did he, by chance, hear them play?

He blinks at them. “Um… Hi!”

“Hi. What are you doing here?”

“Nothing! Nothing- I’m just…. looking for Brian!”

Lyf tilts their head. “Looking for Brian.”

“Yeah! He wanted to ask me about something- I can’t remember what!”

“Hm… No, I haven’t seen him. Perhaps he’s on the bridge? You know, where he usually is.”

“Right! I should check there, but there’s a few other places he likes to hang out too. Or maybe he’s chatting with Nastya.” He pauses, his gaze flickering from the cello to Lyf. “Were you playing something just now?”

“I was.” A thought occurs to them. “Were… Were you actually listening to me play, instead of looking for Brian?”

The reaction is instant, and he seems to be caught off guard by that. “Huh? No, no, I- I was- I just so happened to be walking by and I heard you! Yup, just that.”

Lyf studies him, not fully convinced. “Mmhm.”

“But that’s great! That you’re playing something I mean. Is the cello good? You spent a while fixing it up.

“It works fine now.” They run a hand down the wood surface. “It only needed a caring hand to help it get back in working order.”

“It was a shame that no one had touched the cello in a while. Um, well, I’m going to go look for Brian now. Good you got the cello working.”

He takes his leave, and yet Lyf smiles as they place the bow back on the strings. They want to believe that maybe their music had made him pause. A part of them hopes he liked it, if that’s so. A part of them wonders what an accompanying violin might add.

* * *

Their nightmares have never been kind to them, especially since they fled the Yggdrasil system in the wake of the Bifrost. Always filled with twisted visions, many watchful eyes, screams of static and dying transmissions. Screaming, tearing, rending.

And so much color; far too much and overwhelming.

Lately the nightmares have seemed to escalate. They’re worse than they’ve been before, and they leave Lyf horribly shaken every time. Perhaps it’s the sudden awareness of how they’re changing that’s made them worse. That would make the most sense, right? But even so, the terrible things they see when they dream- it holds Lyf tight until they jolt into the waking world; their heart feeling like it’s about to tear itself from their chest.

They hear a far off song. They hear the static.

Sometimes they dream they hold the Black Box and stare into it as the scenes from the train flash across their vision.

When the visions assail Lyf again, they wake gasping for air and bolted up into a half sitting position. Rainbows linger at the edges of their vision and they faintly hear static ringing in their ears. Their gasps quickly turn into sobs as they put a hand over their mouth and tears begin to flow. They almost don’t even care there’s a faint glowing of color in branching lines under their skin, though that fades quickly.

They’re still crying when the colors and static finally go away. They tremble as they sit their in bed, feeling cold and with fear and dread coursing through their veins. They’re aware now that it was another nightmare, but they’re so, so sick of it. They don’t know what to do about it, to do with everything it stirs up-

> “ _Yeah; anytime. I mean it.”_

They swallow down another cry, remembering those words spoken to them in their earliest days aboard. Lyf remembers the words he spoke, and how he comforted them when they were in pieces, and how he braided their hair so carefully.

With a sniffle, Lyf grabs their coziest cardigan and heads out toward the direction of Marius’s room.

Before, Lyf would have never considered going to see Marius over something like this. Things had changed, however. It wasn’t just because they realized their (repressed) feelings of affection for him, but the way they thought of him now was different than how it used to be. He could still prove to be a pain at times, that hadn’t changed at all, but he’s helped Lyf when they’re not feeling their best, and he’s made them smile more than once. After the events of that day where they realized the Bifrost had more of an effect on them than they realized- Well, Marius’s actions had left quite the impression to say the least.

The nightmares made them feel so alone…. But they weren’t alone. They had somewhere they could turn.

Soon enough, Lyf finds themself standing outside the door to Marius’s room. There’s a nagging feeling of anxiety in the back of their mind telling them they should just leave him be- don’t be a bother; he’s probably sleeping- but Lyf can’t stand to be alone right now.

They hesitate, but work up the nerve to knock on the door. A few minutes of waiting later, and of silently debating whether this was a good idea after all, the door opens.

“Wha- Lyf?” Marius sounded tired, and Lyf is looking anywhere but at him. “Lyf, it’s- wait. What’s up? You look awful.”

Yes, they suppose they do look awful. Waking up from a nightmare will do that.

“The nightmares… they’re getting worse.” They mutter. “So it feels.”

“Ah. That’s not good. Is… Is there anything I can do?”

Lyf shrugs. They know he’s aware of their nightmares at this point, along with everything else, but they still stumble with their words. “I just- I don’t want to be-”

“You can come in if you want.”

Lyf finally looks up, stares at him, and nods silently.

Marius steps aside to allow them in and Lyf enters the room. They look around as the door is closed behind them. They’re not exactly sure what to do or where to go until Marius moves past them and to his own bed. Lyf looks over at him when he sits down, and after a pause, he pats the space beside him; inviting them.

Lyf moves over to the bed, and sits down next to Marius.

“You wanna talk about it?” He asks, not moving closer or reaching out. Just being there.

“I don’t know if I can. It’s...” Lyf trails off, not wanting to think about their dreams, but then picks back up again. “More or less of the same really- well, no, it’s more, kinda. It’s gotten worse since my hair went partially rainbow and I… I can’t...”

A hand gently rests upon one of theirs.

“That’s okay.” Marius assures them. “You don’t need to talk if you don’t wanna. Sometimes all you need in these situations is the presence of another person.”

“Is that why you invited me in?”

“I mean, when you said nightmares- you looked like you at least needed someone to possibly talk to, but I wouldn’t have stopped you if you’d declined.”

Couldn’t have put it better themself. Lyf nods and whispers, “...Yeah.”

“Is it okay to give you a hug?”

They respond by leaning into Marius, bumping their shoulder against his. Marius gathers Lyf into his arms and Lyf tucks their head against him. He hums something, and then pulls Lyf back so they’re both laying propped up against some pillows. They don’t have the energy to care.

The embrace is so warm; grounding and comforting.

“Thank you.” They mutter after a moment.

“Yeah, of course. Hey, how about I tell you a story to get your mind off things?”

“What kind of story?”

“I’ve got a tale from when we were causing some trouble on Asgard.”

They shrug; they need something to distract them. They don’t want to think about the nightmares. “Sure.”

Marius pulls away from them, but doesn’t leave their side. “Now I’m sure at some point you’ve wondered what kind of things me and the other members of this humble crew got up to before we met.”

“I _did_ have your criminal record from your 20 years of running around Yggdrasil. Not too hard to imagine what you were up to.”

“Okay, so you did, but you had just that. Me, Raphaella, and Ivy decided to split off on our own when we got to the Yggdrasil system. We went around to a couple planets and had our usual fun, but at one point we ended up on Asgard.”

“What did you do there? Bother some stupid Asgardian government officials and/or the Aesir?”

“A few of them, yeah. Raph was busy harassing some Asgardian scientists. As for Ivy- I think she said she found her way to some library; said it was called the Völuspá.”

“The Völuspá?” Lyf repeated, surprised; a little more awake at the mention of that place. They rolled over on their side to face him and continued, “The Asgard National Library and Archives? She managed to get in _there_?”

“Yeah. She told us about it later; said she met some weird old lady- head archivist or something.”

“During Odin’s reign, at least from what I know in my teachings, the Völuspá was cut off from the rest of the system; limited to access. I’ve heard Odin had an interest in the Völuspá for some reason, and she would often visit the place. That interest contributed to her closing it off to anyone outside of the Asgardian government and the Aseir royalty. It had something to do with the previous head archivist Odin had spoken to in the early years of her reign. To hear Ivy got in- That would explain how she got books and other artifacts from Asgard.”

“Our Ivy’s clever like that. She’s probably tell you about the experience if you asked. Same with Raph.”

“Hm. So, who exactly did you go pester? Meet anyone interesting? Not that I liked any of them, not after Odin’s reign.”

“Actually those I met were kinda boring.” Marius admitted.

Lyf snorted and rested their head down on one of the pillows. They listen as Marius tells his story about his encounter with Asgardian government officials, and indeed a couple of the Aseir royalty as well, though he was mostly annoying them because screw those assholes. This is certainly much better than thinking about the nightmares that had left them so shaken before.

They just prefer to hear him talk right now; to hear the sound of his voice.

* * *

When Lyf wakes up, they’re feeling surprisingly better, and comfortable. They don’t feel cold anymore. They feel warm; safe. Their hand brushes against a blanket as they open their eyes, and then they also realize that they’re laying against another person. They lift their head up-

Marius is lying there; asleep and his face inches from Lyf’s.

They freeze up, trying to remember. Why was he here? When had they-

And then they remember. This was not their room. This room they were in belonged to Marius. They’d come here last night because they had a nightmare and sought out his company because, well, they trusted him. He’d told them a story from before they met, when he and his friends were causing trouble in the Yggdrasil system.

‘ _I must have fallen asleep.’_ Lyf reasons. Yes, that made sense.

They push themselves up on their elbows and look around, seeing that, yes this is Marius’s room. Also one of his arms lies loosely across Lyf. Okay, so they fell asleep together and must have moved closer to each other while sleeping. They look at Marius, observing him as he continued to sleep, seemingly undisturbed by Lyf waking up before him. He’s making the tiniest, softest snoring sounds they’ve ever heard, and it’s very, very cute. They wonder if he wakes up now if he’ll give them the sleepiest of smiles and it’ll melt Lyf’s heart to mush.

They reach a hand out, suddenly overcome with the desire to place their hand on his cheek, or maybe… maybe even give a light kiss to his forehead. He looks so at peace sleeping like this though, maybe it’s best not to wake him. They still think they woke him when they came over last night, so yeah, let him sleep.

Lyf carefully removes his arm from around them and slides out of bed. They move as quietly as they can to the door. They pause when they open the door, glancing back over to Marius. They feel a bit guilty about leaving him, but they push it down.

“Thank you.” They whisper before stepping out into the hall and closing the door behind them.

* * *

A few days later, Marius seeks out Lyf; trying to contain his excitement because he’s got something to show them. After searching about the ship, he finds Lyf working on something with Nastya down in the engineering decks.

Well, he doesn’t see Lyf right away, but he does see Nastya, and she’s the one who gets Lyf’s attention. It turned out that Lyf was above her working on some pipes.

“What?” They call down, leaning out over the pipes.

“Marius wants to talk to you.” She says back to them.

Lyf shifts their glance over to him, stares at him, and then responds to Nastya. “One moment.”

They come down from the pipes via a rope and harness and set their tools down on the floor once their feet are on solid ground. Their hair is pulled back, but still disheveled looking, and the clothes they wear- a tank top and cargo pants Nastya must have lent them- have patches of grime here and there. Honestly, they look kinda hot.

They cross their arms before they speak to him. “Yes, Marius?”

Marius unfreezes, clearing his throat. “Yes! Ah…” He turns to Nastya. “May I borrow Lyf for a bit?”

“I don’t see why not.” She replies. “I can handle things here.”

“Suppose I could take a break.” They say and turn to Marius. “So, what is it you want?”

“I’m glad you asked! But for that, you’re gonna have to come with me.”

Before he can give Lyf a chance to respond, he takes them by the hand and starts to pull them out of the room. They sputter some nonsense, but follow along.

“Mind explaining where the Hel you’re taking me?” Lyf asks as they leave the engineering decks, a hint of annoyance in their voice.

“To the observatory!” Marius answers. “I’ve got something to show you!”

“And let me guess, you’re not gonna tell me until we get there?”

“It’s a surprise!”

They sigh. “Alright, alright.”

Lyf doesn’t say anything more for the remainder of the walk up to the observatory. Marius hasn’t let go of their hand, but they don’t pull away either.

When they get to the observatory, Marius guides them toward the windows, asking them to sit down, and leaves them to go to a console nearby. He hopes he remembers the instructions Ivy relayed to him.

“Now will you tell me what you supposedly have to show me?” He hears Lyf ask again.

“Have patience, dear Lyf.” He assures them. “It’ll be just a moment.”

It takes a few minutes to set up what he’s trying to do, as per Ivy’s instructions, but sure enough he gets the inputs set and gets it up and running. Smiling, he steps away from the console and back to Lyf as the lights in the room begin to dim and he sits next to them. Lyf looks confused.

“What’s going on, Marius?”

He doesn’t elaborate further, other than saying, “You’ll see.”

Lyf opens their mouth to respond, but the shielding on the windows comes down, blocking out the view of the stars, and a star chart is projected instead. They look over at the projection, and Marius can pinpoint the moment the recognize what it is they’re seeing. They look stunned.

“Is… Is that a… a star chart of the Yggdrasil system?”

“Yup!” Marius beams.

Lyf looks over at him; their eyes are wide. “...How did you get this?”

“You know Ivy saved a lot of things from Yggdrasil as a whole. She collected a lot from our travels around the system before ending up in prison on New Midgard, and she offhandedly mentioned a few days ago that she had some star charts. I talked to her about it and she helped me get them set up on the observatory’s projection system. Totally interactable and accurate right up until… well, you know. I thought you’d like to see them and I also thought this might make you feel a little more at home.”

They go to say something, but they don’t make a sound.

“Do you like it?” Marius tries, hoping he didn’t break Lyf or something.

After a moment, there’s a nod, and they whisper, “I do...”

“Great! That’s fantastic!” He’s grinning at them, but they still look a bit like they can’t believe it. “You okay?”

“Yes, I… It’s just-” They look back to the star chart, raising a hand and gesturing at it. “Remembering that Yggdrasil is gone, that _I’m the last_ \- it still hurts. It hurts every day. But you’ve given me a little piece of home. Of course there’s the materials Ivy recovered, but… I’m glad this is here; that you showed me this.”

“And guess what? It gets better. Ivy says she can program you your own personal projection on this star chart to have in your room.”

“Oh… That’s good to know.”

Marius glances at the star chart as well, to see if he recognizes anything. He sort of doesn’t, even though he knows how to read these kinds of things because, well, formerly a pilot and all. He never really got to take a look at a Yggdrasil start chart before.

He looks back to Lyf, and he asks, “Hey, can you show me where some stuff is on this? Like planets and such?”

Puzzlement crosses their face. “But you were there.”

“I’ve never seen a Yggdrasil star chart! Not until Ivy showed me this one when we were setting it up.”

“Okay then. I guess I could. You’re lucky I had to study a few as part of my training with the transport police. So this bright spot in the middle? That’s our sun, Valhöll. Asgard was the closest planet to this star, and part of the first sector. That’s over here- follow my direction.”

Marius does, looking to where Lyf is pointing out Asgard’s position on the star chart. They give a few facts about Asgard as well, though they don’t sound too fond of that planet in particular. Which makes sense; Asgard was the planet Odin reigned from and were generally not the greatest of people. Lyf goes on to point out some other planets in the sector for him, before moving onto the second sector, where most of their family was from.

“Me and Lisbeth were born on Midgard as was my mother, Ingrid. Right here.” Lyf shows him. “And do you see this planet here, the big one? That’s Jotunheim, our largest planet. My mum, Vilja, originally lived there before she came to Midgard. And then over here we have Svartalheim. My sister-in-law, Revna, was from there.”

“Okay, the Jotunheim thing makes sense if it’s the biggest planet.” Marius says.

“It’s said that the people there are descended from the first _Jättar_ , or Giant, as it is said of us all really, but they had a closer affinity to them. So it is said.” They go a little quiet after saying this, staring out at the star chart.

After a moment of being unresponsive, Marius decides to get their attention. “Hey, Lyf?”

“I hear you. I got lost for a moment.” They reply, getting up and walking toward the star chart. “...I wish I could have gotten to see more of it, you know.”

“Of Yggdrasil?”

“Yes. I mean, travel to other planets was always a bit pricey, but there was so much to Yggdrasil; so much to see and learn. And all of it just vanished in an instant, destroyed by the Bifrost, the madness of Yog-Sothoth. The same madness I carry in me now.”

Oh boy, they’re getting existential again. Marius stands too and goes over to them.

“That may be true, but couldn’t it also be said that Yggdrasil is still alive through you?”

They turn, consideration on their face. The glow of the projected star chart is silhouetted against them, and damn do they look gorgeous in its light. Radiant. Prismatic. Like stardust… whatever that was supposed to be.

“I suppose so.” Lyf answers. “But one day even I will fade and return to stardust. At least there’s your band’s album now, and the project me and Ivy are working on.”

“Hm, yeah.” Marius swings the subject back to their previous conversation. “Hey, wanna get back to you telling me where the planets are and stuff about them? That was interesting.”

“Yeah. Sure.”

They both sit back down on the floor and as he looks over to Lyf, they make eye contact. They give him a tiny smile, and then they’re back to telling him about the planets of the Yggdrasil system.

* * *

By this point, Lyf’s been long since aware that the Mechanisms new album is about their investigation into the disappearance of the Ratatosk, and the events that caused it. Hel, Jonny has a transcript of the events that Lyf made for him to use. They’re not necessarily mad about it anymore, despite the underlying fact of “you turned my trauma into a musical”. The truth of the matter was that in a way, these space pirates had immortalized their story, so Yggdrasil leaves on and anyone who gets curious about it will know what happened. It won’t be a mystery.

They can live with that, they think.

For as long as they’ve been traveling with the Mechs, they’ve been practicing for the new album. Recently Lyf’s heard their next destination was where they had decided to debut this story.

And once that was done they could get rid of the Black Box for good.

Sometimes, Lyf will find the group practicing some songs. They’ve even sat in on a few practice sessions. They know which roles are which, and they know the story. Jonny has utilized the transcript they gave him well, and Lyf is satisfied with that. The music gives the story life, and Lyf can recognize individual pieces of songs from the story by now. All in all, the group has done well.

Nastya had told them once that when it came to music, they all took it very seriously, especially Jonny. Some of them had written out their traumas from their past into song, which Marius had also suggested to Lyf, so they understood. When the band was working on a new album, they would practice often to make sure it was just right.

So it comes to no surprise when Lyf’s heading down to engineering and they catch familiar notes of music. They think- It sounds like it’s one of the songs from the second half of the new album, towards the end.

Lyf follows the music to an open door nearby and steps in. They find the Mechanisms there, and yes, it appears they’ve come in on the tail end of another practice session. They haven’t been noticed yet, so they keep toward the back of the room, not wanting to disturb the others.

They hear Ashes and Tim singing together- must be the song depicting Loki and Sigyn’s last moments; the sacrifice of the former to keep the train going as long as possible, knowing it wouldn’t matter in the end. As they finish the song and the music dies down, Jonny does the final section of narration; Lyf’s final recording before they fled.

When he’s finished speaking, Lyf doesn’t move just quite yet, deciding to observe them for a bit longer.

“Sounds pretty good, everyone.” Jonny addresses them before turning to Brian, who looks to be messing around with some piece of machinery. “And for the finale- you gonna be able to get the playback on that thing working?”

“It should work, though I have no idea why you wanted to include these.” Brian replies. “It’s a decent enough ending by implying Lyfrassir escaped just as the Bifrost emerged in full to engulf the Yggdrasil system.”

“Oh, come on. These are the actual transmissions.”

Transmissions? Wait…

“Alright. Testing playback now.”

A switch is flipped on the machinery crackles to life, and what Lyf hears from it- they remember.

All the transmissions that followed them as they fled; a multitude of words that melted together into screams. Broken up by static that they couldn’t block out. All the sounds of a dying world as it was consumed by the Bifrost.

They don’t know when they backed up against the wall, or when someone finally saw them and said “oh shit”. They don’t know when they slid down to the floor, putting their hands over their ears and shutting their eyes in an attempt to shut it out. Their heart’s beating so fast and they can’t make it stop. They want it to stop.

“Fucking shut it off already!” Someone yells, breaking through the noise.

It all stops, so suddenly, and after a moment Lyf dares to open their eyes. There’s a few people standing nearby, looking at them strangely. Marius is the closest, but isn’t so close as to crowd around them. The rest of the group remains where they are; onlookers.

“Give them some space.” Marius says, turning to the other two closest, Ivy and Tim. He looks back to Lyf. “Hey… The machine isn’t running anymore. It’s alright.”

Lyf hears them, but they can’t stop shaking. They swear they can still hear the static.

“T-Those- Those transmissions- I don’t want to hear them again, please-”

“You won’t. Sorry about that, if I had known you were in the room-”

“Stop. Just… Just don’t play those again.”

“Yeah. Yeah, of course.”

Marius reaches out a hand, and Lyf takes it. Something still doesn’t feel right though, even as he helps them to their feet. There’s still static ringing in their ears and they have to blink away the spots of rainbow that dance around their vision. Marius is talking to them, but they aren’t paying attention.

They don’t feel right.

Ivy and Tim are still nearby and they’re both looking at Lyf with expressions of vague concern.

“Will you be alright, Edda?” Ivy asks. “You look pale.”

“Also, you’re, uh, glowing.” Tim adds.

At that Lyf gives him a puzzled look and looks at their hands, finding that they are indeed glowing rainbow.

They pull away from Marius, who, for his part, looks unfazed by the glowing. He’s watching them carefully, but keeping his distance.

“Lyf?”

“My- My head hurts.” They lie. They can’t stay. They need to go. “I’m gonna- gonna go lay down.”

They retreat away from him and flee the room as quick as they can, not looking back as they stumble back to their room.

* * *

They slam the door of their room shut the second they get inside, collapsing down to sit back against the door. They stare at their hands, breaths coming in shaky and uneven. They’re still glowing; shifting colors clinging to their skin like a mist. The same colors that surrounded them in their dreams and flowed through them.

They shut their eyes tight and clench their hands, trying to will the glow to stop. The static has stopped now, thankfully, but Lyf’s still not recovered from hearing the transmissions, and that’s not making the situation any better.

Hearing those again... All those voices… The sounds that had haunted them as they left Yggdrasil to its doom. It haunted them now, echoing in their nightmares, just like the scenes from the Black Box that always came back to torment them. The Black Box, which burned the very recordings into their mind-

In a moment of clarity, they still and lift their head up. They crawl over to their bed, and reach under it to where they know the Black Box lies. Once they pull it out and into the light, feeling the weight of it in their hand, they decide what they are going to do.

They stand and head for the door, Black Box in hand. They’re going to dispose of this thing.

If they were remembering correctly, there was an incinerator on board down in the lower levels. They could dispose of the Black Box that way. Now that the Mechs had the official record of their investigation that they transcribed from the recordings, the Black Box had served its purpose and Lyf had no more need for it. Best to get rid of it all the same regardless. They don’t want or need any more reminders of what they had lost and what they were becoming.

Lyf makes their way through the halls, trying to remember how to get to the lower levels, and aware they’re probably still glowing. They could deal with that later, right now they were set on getting rid of the Black Box. They could always have Aurora point them in the right direction if they got lost. Remembering the right direction aside, there was a thought in the back of their head that whispered “what if this didn’t work” and “what was the point”.

The Black Box itself had survived the initial incident, since it was completely intact when it was recovered. The only thing, as Lyf had noted back then, was that the footage wasn’t in the best shape, though it had later been fixed by Ivy. Given that, it was entirely possible this plan would not destroy the Black Box and that this was pointless. But the point was that Lyf wanted it to be gone, even if it would change nothing.

‘ _Of course it won’t change anything.’_ Something whispers to them. _‘Yggdrasil is still gone. You’re still marked by the Bifrost.’_

Lyf stops, their grip tight around the Black Box. They take in a breath and glance down at the thing.

“It’s not about changing things. It’s about closure.”

‘ _As if that hides what you are. You can’t hide what calls to you; flows through you. It is a part of you now.’_

They shiver, a cold chill settling over them. Rainbow crowd around the edges of their vision, but they assume it’s just tears.

“Doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

‘ _But you know it’s there. You’re still the one who looked into the Black Box; into the metaphorical abyss. And something looked back.’_

Of course Lyf knew. It wasn’t like disposing of the Black Box would undo the damage or absolve them of anything. They know within them rests a piece of the Bifrost, and there was nothing they could do about it. Damned if they let it get the better of them. Damned if they let it take them. They couldn’t let it do that, no matter how much it twists just beneath their skin. They can’t because if they do they’ll just become another squamous thing, like those people on the train. They can’t-

They can’t-

They-

* * *

“Where do you think they’ve gone?” Marius wonders aloud as he and Raphaella walk down a corridor.

“Beats me.” She says from beside him.

It’d been bad timing and bad luck Lyf so happened to be in the room when Jonny and Brian were testing the transmissions Jonny wanted to play back at the end of the album- closing dramatic flair, he said. Marius hadn’t known Lyf was even in the room; he hadn’t seen them come in, but at some point they snuck into the room. Probably while they were all still in song. Ashes spotted them shortly after the transmissions started to play back, and the instant Marius saw Lyf- how they put their hands over their ears and shut their eyes tight against the sound- he yelled at the others to shut the machine off.

Still seeing them even after it was turned off, how scared they look and the prismatic glow that had begun to surround them…

After Lyf left the room, Marius set off to find them and make sure they weren’t, well…. Weren’t pacing around somewhere leaving rainbow tracks that melted the floor or something. Raphaella was tagging along because she was curious about the glowy thing. He’d already stopped at their room, but got no response so he was trying something else.

“Maybe they ran off to the library?” Raphaella suggests. “Or maybe down to engineering! Lyf and Nastya talk frequently.”

She was right about that, actually. “There is a place in the library Lyf likes to hang out in. I found them there the day their hair went rainbow. But we can check in with Nastya if they’re not there.”

They set off in the direction of the library, but it isn’t too long after setting out in that direction that they run into Ivy.

“There you two are.” She says. “I assume you’re looking for Edda.”

“Yeah.” Marius replies. “Well, Raph wants to find them for science purposes.”

“You may want to hold off on that.”

The response sets him on edge. “What do you mean?”

She quickly leads them along and, soon enough, she brings them into an adjoining corridor; to what she wanted them to see.

There’s Lyf; just standing in the middle of the area and looking down at something in their hand. Marius recognizes the object they hold- the Black Box; glowing with as much color as Lyf is.

“How long have they been like that?” Marius asks Ivy.

She shrugs. “Not sure. They were like this when I found them.”

“That’s the Black Box they’re holding, right?” Raphaella points out, gesturing to the cube in their hand.

“Yes.” Ivy confirms. “It appears they might be transfixed by it.”

“Transfixed?” Marius and Raphaella echo at once.

“Looks like it.”

Raphaella moves toward Lyf, her wings giving a flutter of curiosity. “Hey. Lyf? You there?”

“Raphaella, wait.” Ivy warns.

But she’s not listening. “Um… Aurora to Lyf?”

She reaches out to grasp Lyf’s shoulder. That proves to be her mistake.

A second later, Lyf turns on her. At the same time, something like a black tentacle materializes out of Lyf and knocks Raphaella back. They had been standing back to everyone else before, but now Marius can see them more clearly. The glow still persists around them, but there’s also a web of rainbow crossing all across their skin. There’s more of it under their eyes too, almost like a bruise. It’s almost like before when their hair partially changed color and he found them in the middle of a meltdown because of it. There’s something more frightening about it now, however.

“Whoa, okay, sorry.” Raphaella quickly apologizes. “It’s just us, Lyf.”

Lyf seems to have realized there’s actually other people here. They stare back at everyone else for a long moment, and their expression shifts like they’ve realized something horrible. They take a step back away. Marius notices their steps leave a slight rainbow impression in the floor that warps the area slightly. He thinks they say something, or they start to say something, but all he hears is a gasp as they suddenly clutch at their head, the Black Box slipping from their grasp.

They sink down to their knees and the warping of metal spreads out to circle around their form, creating a rippling effect on the floor. The lights in the corridor flicker like mad.

“Lyf-” Marius tries.

Lyf flinches at the sound of their name, as if saying their name hurt. More tentacles spring out from their back, moving and curling around them. They’re not looking at him anymore. They’re staring down at the floor now, shimmering tears flowing from their eyes.

“Well, shit.” Marius mutters.

“Interesting.” Raphaella observes. “This is an interesting development. I’ve noted Lyf’s Bifrost levels seem to increase when they’re stressed, but I was not anticipating extra appendages.”

“Raph, not the time.”

“He’s right.” Ivy agrees. “We should try and calm then down, lest this get any worse and they start to cause real damage to the ship, or they hurt themself.”

Marius thinks back to when he saw Lyf in their room after their hair turned rainbow; their scared expression as they realized what was going on with them. What was changing them. He remembers how tightly they clung to him as they cried. He remembers taking them to Raphaella’s lab, and how they looked at him like-

> _“_ _I trust you.”_

He has an idea.

“I’ll try talking to them.” Marius decides.

“You sure?” Ivy asks.

“I’ve seen them like this before. Talking seemed to help; having someone to anchor them and help them come back down. What’s the worst that could happen?” Both Ivy and Raphaella give him incredulous looks. “Okay, well, _if_ something bad does happen shout at Aurora to flood the area with knockout gas. But let me try and talk to them first, please.”

He turns back to Lyf, still kneeled on the floor. He walks toward them, his movements slow as to prevent them from getting startled. When he steps into the area where the floor is warping, it ripples around his feet like he’s walking through water. The closer he gets to Lyf, the more colorful the floor turns, like all the color is flowing right from Lyf.

Once he’s in front of them, he gets down to his knees.

“Lyf? You there Lyf?” Marius says, speaking as gently as he can. When Lyf doesn’t respond, he tries again. “Come on, Lyf. Let me know you’re in there.”

Carefully, he takes their hands and removes them from their head. A couple of the tentacles bat at him as he does this, but he ignores it. Once he’s lowered their hands back down to their side, they look up. Maybe the contact brought them out of it a little. In any case, he doesn’t let go.

* * *

All they can hear is static. It’s so loud that it hurts. They see those many colors flowing through their veins.

It’s hard to think through all of it, hard to keep themselves together. Or maybe they’re not. Maybe they’re finally falling apart. They can’t help the tears that fall from their eyes.

But someone sees them. Someone finds them. They hear someone over the noise of the static. _His_ face is there before them. He’s talking to them, and they grasp onto it, trying to use it as an anchor. They can’t lose this, they can’t-

* * *

“Marius...” They whisper. Colors flow in their silver eyes.

“Yeah. That’s me.” He takes a moment to consider his words. “You’ve gotten a bit overwhelmed, haven’t you? The transmissions, and now whatever’s brought this on. That’s all that’s happened.”

“You…. You shouldn’t- the Bifrost- I hear it, all around me. It’s so loud. I feel it in me.” Lyf’s hands move and grab onto his arms instead. “Marius. Marius, it hurts.”

“I know. All of this has been hard for you.”

They’re still crying and he has such an urge to wipe their tears away, but that can wait.

Lyf ducks their head again, wincing. “R-Raphaella. I-”

“Hey, stay with me now. She’s okay. You were just reacting accordingly; no harm done. We all get it.”

“...You’re not scared. Of me.”

He shakes his head. “No. Why would I be? Now, why don’t you come back and be here with us? I’d much rather have you here.”

Lyf whines a low sound, but still manages to get a word out. “Why… should you… care? I don’t understand.”

“Because you’re Lyf. You’re Lyfrassir Edda. Contrary to our history, I do care. Even if you’re Bifrost touched. Even if you get all glowy sometimes. Even if you’ve got tentacles now- which are actually pretty cool!”

Lyf manages to lift their head up and the glow around them begins to dissipate. They lean forward and Marius takes this as a sign to pull them close. As they collapse against his chest, they speak in a weak voice.

“Please don’t go.”

“I’m not going anywhere; I’ve got you.” He assures them. “Find my voice and listen. Come back to us.”

He closes his eyes, and he starts to sing.

> _“Some things unknown, a million places unseen_
> 
> _Across the vast wastes of space a thousand tales untold_
> 
> _This crew immortal can tell these tales untold”_

Redeath. He doesn’t sing this one as good as TS can, and it’s a song that’s only been preformed a handful of times, but he sings it now, for Lyf. The point of origin for this song was something the crew had seen a couple decades after he and Raphaella joined the crew, and TS had come up with the words on the spot in a flash of inspiration.

It’s strange now, how this song makes him think about Lyf, and what happened to their world. Lyf’s escape, thinking they were dead, but they were still alive, though changed at the will of the Bifrost. Yggdrasil burned, but Lyf escaped. They live again as someone new, though still the same Lyf he knows.

> _“At the edge of the worlds we saw a planet fall and_
> 
> _Spread its wings, throw itself into the flaming sun_
> 
> _A dwindling spark that blinked in the flaming sun”_

Marius continues to sing, hoping this can reach Lyf. They are motionless in his arms, but he wants to think they’re listening.

* * *

“Please don’t go.” They plead.

“I’m not going anywhere; I’ve got you.” His voice rings back.

They are held and they know, somehow, that they’re safe. To their surprise, he starts to sing, and it sounds so much like the one they heard in a dream. So they listen to his voice as he sings, and the Bifrost slowly recedes back into themself.

Lyf eventually comes back to themselves, in the embrace of Marius.

* * *

When he finishes the song, he opens his eyes, and he notices that the glow is gone completely, as are the tentacles. Lyf pulls back from him and he can see their face now. Most of the rainbow colors that branched across their face have receded and their eyes have returned to plain silver.

“Hey.” He says to them, softly. “There you are.”

Lyf looks back at him, frayed. It looks like the worst of whatever just happened is over now and Lyf is back to themself, though maybe a bit shaken up.

Before he can say any more, they start coughing and double over. Marius lets go of them and scoots back as they heave something black onto the floor, but he quickly moves to be at their side and patting their back. They feel cold under his touch.

When they’re stable again, Marius helps Lyf to their feet, though they shake and lean on him quite a bit. Such a release of their power must have taken a lot out of them. That or their body still wasn’t too used to the presence of the Bifrost. Or there was always the possibility they were in a state of shock over what just happened.

Raphaella approaches them, but only to take a swab of the oily sludge on the floor that Lyf coughed up. Marius wrinkles his nose at the sight.

“Gross, Raph.”

Raphaella shrugs and ignores his comment. Meanwhile, a screen pops out of the wall, meaning Aurora must have taken notice of the situation.

 **{AUR:** Is Lyfrassir alright now? **}** She asks.

“I’ve got it under control, Aurora; don’t worry.” He returns his attention to Lyf. “Lets get you warmed up. There’s a heated blanket I keep in the medbay.”

* * *

> **Humble_First_Mate:** Okay I was kidding about the tearing-a-hole-in-space-time shit
> 
> **AlwaysTimeForScience:** It didn’t progress to quite that extent, thankfully
> 
> **Gunfire &Explosions_Tim: **Let Lyf know once they’re feeling better we can go throw some darts at Jonny
> 
> **Humble_First_Mate:** Hey!
> 
> **Cooler Violinist:** Is that why Aurora freaked out earlier? What did you do to upset Lyfrassir?
> 
> **Drumbot The Pilot:** I think it’s better to leave Lyfrassir be for now.
> 
> **ArsonistOfYourDreams:** Or we can just find the nearest planet and let them vent their frustrations. Maybe set something on fire.
> 
> **Archivy:** Fire is your solution to everything.
> 
> **ArsonistOfYourDreams:** You know it.
> 
> **AlwaysTimeForScience:** Oh, Marius- while you have them, can you ask if I can have the Black Box to conduct a few tests on?
> 
> **Friendly_Crewmate:** Should I Make Them Some Tea?
> 
> **Cooler Violinist:** Uh... Maybe not right now, TS.

Marius sets down his phone to ignore further incoming messages, deciding to fetch the heated blanket he promised Lyf. He returns to Lyf, who is sitting on one of the cots, and hands the heated blanket to them. The streaks of color shadowed under their eyes is concerning, but he is choosing to ignore that for the time being.

He gets Lyf some water, since they still look a bit woozy, and hopefully they’ll be okay with that. They haven’t been sick again at least. Once he hands them off a glass, he runs through the basic observations to assess their current physical condition.

“There’s a bit of a fluctuation in your temperature, but other than that you seem okay.” He concludes once he’s done. “You still feeling nauseous?”

“Not as much, no.” They take another sip of water. They’ve stopped shaking, so hopefully the heated blanket is helping.

He’s gone though the basic checks. Nothing appears to be seriously wrong with them, aside from the temperature thing, but the only reason Marius made a note of that was because of Lyf’s permanently lowered body temperature. With how the Bifrost has changed them, he doesn’t know if that’s something to be concerned about. Raphaella might have more insight to offer, as she’s the one who’s studying the effects of the Bifrost on Lyf. But their vitals and everything are fine, so he’s going to assume they’re fine.

“Good. Whatever you did back there looks like it took a toll on you.”

Lyf moves their gaze away, looking down into their glass of water instead. “Back there- What came over me was...”

Their words trail off and they vaguely look like they might be sick again. Marius taps the glass they’re holding.

“Drink if you can. It’ll make you feel better.” He insists. He’s heard Lyf say before that whenever they’ve tapped into their power it leaves them drained and tired. It’s not surprising; the energy that’s become so intertwined with them is of the Bifrost, and they’re trying to adapt to it. Physically, their body is trying to adapt, and on the other hand it likely hasn’t been great for their mental well being.

They do drink the water, and it takes them a few minutes before they can speak again.

“I feel so hollowed out by it; the Bifrost, I mean. It’s changed me so much. You saw me back there, didn’t you? A lot of it was different sensations, and the static was ringing so loud- it hurt and I could barely focus- but I was somewhat aware. I saw the space warping and changing color around me. I saw those… those _things_ that pushed Raphaella away. I know they came from me.”

“While that’s true, I don’t think any of us could have predicted what kind of effect the Bifrost was going to have on you. None of us are really versed in Outer Gods or eldritch rainbow stuff.”

“Hearing those transmissions was bad enough, but of course then some of the Bifrost slips free and I see just how far I’ve wandered into being some sort of eldritch monstrosity.” New tears come to their eyes. “I hate it… I hate it so much. I never wanted this. Yet, here I am.”

Marius nods. “Yeah, I get that.”

They down the rest of their water and pull the blanket closer around themself. “...I didn’t hurt Raphaella, did I?”

“Nah, she’s fine. Trust me, we’ve all seen and endured a lot worse.”

They sigh with what sounds like relief. “Okay, good. I didn’t notice any of you were there until she approached.”

He still thinks Lyf didn’t mean to react like they did, not when they looked to be in some sort of trance and the sudden contact probably was jarring. Now that he thinks about it, he thinks about another thing he’d noticed when Ivy brought him and Raphaella to them...

“Why do you still have the Black Box?” Marius asks, mostly out of curiosity.

Lyf’s gaze flickers back to him. “Did… Did you not- I thought Jonny might have mentioned it in passing. I made him a transcript from the recordings so you all could tell the story accurately.”

“I just assumed he worked out the details with some of the others. We knew some of the story beforehand. I didn’t think you would have taken it with you.”

They sigh and shake their head. “Something… Some part of me didn’t want to leave it behind. I am the last remaining record of what happened to my world, and that thing holds that information as well. No one else but me knows because everyone else is either dead or worse!”

“But we know; me and the rest of the crew.” He points out.

“Yes. Yes, you do. I’ve sat in on your band’s practices on the story, up to a point. I had a reason before for keeping it, and then I made the transcript from the Black Box’s recordings. After that, I realized I didn’t need the Black Box anymore. I wanted to get rid of that thing, that’s what I was going to do. Now that your band has made an album about what happened, and with me and Ivy’s project, I have no reason to keep the Black Box. So I want it gone now. It’s just a reminder. I guess you could say I wanted to give myself some closure.”

He nods, understanding their reasoning. “We can think of a way to get rid of it, if that’s what you want.”

“It is what I want.” They reiterate.

“Which is understandable! But maybe not keep the Black Box anywhere near you in the meantime? Something tells me it’s not good for your health. Raph does want to study it, so maybe-”

“Sure, tell her to go nuts.”

Marius cracks a smile. “That was easy. She’s been bugging me about it for the last 15 minutes. You know she’s all about science.”

“So long as the science isn’t being preformed on me.”

He’s not too worried; Raphallea has promised not to do any science on them, and she’ll be busy with the Black Box for the next few days at least.

Marius watches as Lyf leans forward a small bit and close their eyes. He hopes they don’t pass out because they’ll just fall forward onto the floor.

“Falling asleep there, Lyf?” Marius jokes.

Lyf blinks their eyes open again and sits back up straight. “Ah, I’m… still not all there.”

He can tell. Lyf seems to be stuck in a state of processing. It was the same as last time after they had their breakdown over their hair changing color. “That’s fine. You need anything?”

Confusion crosses their face. “I… don’t know? It’s all so…” They stop and chuckle; a low and dry sound. “I’m a bit of a mess right now.”

“I mean, after that…” He trails off, deciding returning to talking about them going all eldritch might not be the best line of conversation. He stands from the chair instead. “I’m gonna do some things around here. You’re free to stay as long as you like. Take a nap or whatever. I’ve got some medical texts lying around you can read if you want. It’s still a while before dinner too.”

“I think I’ll just sit for a while, but thank you.”

In the end, Lyf doesn’t stay very long, leaving to go drop off the Black Box to Raphaella. The next time he sees them is at dinner. At some point, Jonny decides to be a brat and tries to steal some of Lyf’s garlic bread. So they summon a tentacle to push him away. They warn to let them enjoy their pasta and garlic bread in peace or they’ll throw their drink in his face next time. That gets a couple laughs from around the table.

Marius is glad Jonny didn’t throw a fork at them or something.

* * *

He’s about to drift off to sleep when there’s a knock on his door. Marius rolls over in bed and squints at the door, and yet, he gets up anyway and heads over.

When he opens the door, he’s slightly surprised to see Lyf on the other side once again.

“Oh, hey.” He greets with a yawn.

They nod wordlessly. They’re looking kinda out of it, so Marius can take a guess as to what’s going on here.

“Let me guess, another nightmare?”

Another nod.

Just as he thought. “You wanna stay for a bit?”

And another nod.

It must have been really bad this time if it’s rendered them speechless. And also because it looks like they’ve been crying.

They still don’t say anything as he leads them in, bringing them over to the bed so they can have somewhere to sit. He wonders if he should get them something warm to drink; they look like they could use it. But he part of him doesn’t want to leave Lyf alone, if the last time this happened was any indication. He knew Lyf’s been having nightmares, for obvious and understandable reasons, and they had said those had been worse as of late. With what happened earlier today too, it wouldn’t be too surprising if that was what was keeping them awake.

“So...” He tries. “You wanna talk? Or… I don’t know. I can get you something to drink if you want. I’d have to go out to the kitchen- oh, but then we could take a stroll around the ship! Just throwing out ideas here.”

Lyf looks over at him, still silent. Marius takes notice of how their hair is messy and starting to come undone from the loose braid it’s in.

“Feel free to shoot this down, but would you like me to fix up your hair?”

Lyf blinks, and runs a hand over said braid. They giving a consenting nod, which is his cue to grab one of his pillows and place it in his lap.

“Come here; lay down.” He says, gesturing toward himself.

They do so, resting their head on the pillow. They look up at him and he gives them a reassuring smile before setting to work. Lyf’s hair may have some new color to it, aka the rainbows, but he still finds it pretty. Lyf’s always had such long, beautiful hair. It’s as he’s starting the braid he hears them speak.

“I’m sorry for waking you. Again.” They finally say, their voice sounding fragile.

Marius shrugs. “Don’t worry; it’s not a big deal. When I met Raphaella, we would talk to each other when this sort of thing happened. Our mechanizations were only decades apart, so when we were traveling together, those were still fresh wounds to us. Me and Tim have, at times, stayed up late talking to each other when we couldn’t sleep because, well, we both fought in wars. We found common ground in that.”

“Still...”

He doesn’t reply to that. He doesn’t mind having Lyf here; quite the opposite, really.

“How’re you feeling?” He asks them.

They say nothing save for a sigh. That’s all he needs to know.

“It was bad this time, huh?”

“The nightmares are always bad.”

“That’s why they’re nightmares. Only asked ‘cause you look out of sorts. You’ve been having a rough day.” He replies as he finishes their braid. “There, all fixed.”

Lyf runs their fingers over the braid. “Thanks. And… yes, the nightmare was- They’re always a lot and right now even more so. I always feel so disoriented, and not myself. Gods, I forgot where I was after this one for… I don’t know how long before deciding to come here.”

“Yeah, those ones are never fun. A few of us could tell you that from experience.”

They nod and sit up, which is too bad. Marius was really enjoying having their head in his lap. They face away from him, and he wonders what they’re thinking about (he could probably make a decent guess). Silence lapses between them and he’s half tempted to just fall back in bed and go to sleep; Lyf’s free to leave whenever they please.

“I keep thinking about what happened today.” Lyf says. “I know… I know there’s no escaping the Bifrost, what I’ve become. And I know you all, you and the rest of the Mechs- death doesn’t phase you, but the last thing I want is to hurt any of you. I want to believe I’ve found a place here, although that’s something I struggle to believe myself. I don’t want that taken from me again.”

Marius, against his better judgment, reaches out and places his hand on Lyf’s, and then whispers, “That won’t happen.”

Lyf turns to him; stares at him as if processing those very words. Marius moves closer and puts an arm around them.

“How about you lay down for a bit? Till you feel better.” He offers.

They sigh and pull away from him so they can lay down on the bed. Marius pats their shoulder and grabs a blanket for them. After that, he grabs himself a book and sits next to Lyf, leaving them be, but not too far away in case they need anything.

Eventually he starts to drift off once again...

* * *

This time, Marius is the first to wake. He also wakes to find Lyf is here, cuddled up right to him.

Well… That’s something.

They look so much more calm compared to when they showed up at his door. He hadn’t fully been expecting them to stay either. The last time this happened, Lyf had fallen asleep when Marius was telling them a story to distract them from their nightmare, and Marius had told himself he was going to wait a little bit to make sure they were actually asleep before moving them back to their room. He ended up falling asleep shortly after though. The next morning he had woken up to find out that Lyf had gone. Which was fine, really, so long as they were feeling better. They had no obligation to stay.

(Though Marius had hoped last time they would have stayed)

Here they were, however; sleeping soundly, by the looks of it. That’s a relief, given yesterday and then that night when they came to him.

Marius props himself up on one arm and smiles down at them; peacefully asleep. They’re too cute. Only on a handful of occasions, before they came aboard, had Marius seen them like this. Those were times Marius had seen them asleep at their desk, or the one time they fell asleep when they were asking him and the others something about a case. Taking in the sight of them now, he feels lucky he gets to see them so at ease; unguarded. It warms his heart.

And he loves them. God dammit, he loves them.

He’d like to hold them forever in this moment and whisper those words to them. Maybe he should, because he knows they won’t be around forever.

Before he can think any further on that, Lyf stirs beside him and makes a cute little sound in their sleep before finally opening their eyes. It takes them a moment, but slowly they shift their gaze up at him. Marius simply grins at them.

“Good morning.”

Lyf blinks at him, and rolls over onto their back. “...Sorry. Didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“What are you apologizing for? It looks like you needed the rest. You’re much more relaxed today.”

“That’s because I just woke up.”

“And? Did you sleep well? Or, better, I mean.”

“...Maybe.”

Marius sits up a bit in bed so he can recline back against the pillows. “You know, if you’re worried about bothering me or something, don’t be. I don’t mind it. Any time you have a nightmare or if you can’t sleep, you can come here.”

Lyf looks up at him, but then sits up and pushes the blanket off them. “Okay. Thank you. I’m just… I’m not used to- I don’t want to be-”

Marius stops them before they can finish that. “It’s fine, Lyf. Totally fine.”

They look away from him, looking down at their hands. “I’m going to the kitchen to get something to drink.”

At the chance this is an open invitation, he responds with, “Want some company?”

Lyf gets out of bed, but turns around to face him. There’s the faintest hint of a smile on their lips. “Sure.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only two chapters left to go now. My hope if to have the next one out this coming month and the last one in March, when this fic will have been in progress for about a year!


End file.
